Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Saltburn (2023)

Poor Dear Pamela: We met in rehab so... 

He was just so lovely at first, and then... 

all his business partners started sort of 

falling out of windows. You know. 

Oliver: Right. Lucky escape.

Poor Dear Pamela: I suppose so. But he spoke 

Russian all the time and it just sounded so romantic. 

And I don’t know the Russian word for “whore” so 

I sort of thought it sounded like lovely poetry.

Oliver: Yeah.

Poor Dear Pamela: Daddy always said 

that I'd end up at the bottom of the Thames.

A very happy birthday to our dear Carey Mulligan!

Something Stinks in Cinema

There's a cute picture of a shirtless Barry Keoghan looking like he smells something vaguely unpleasant, which seems like the perfect introduction to my review of "his" movie Hurry Up Tomorrow -- he's only a supporting character and not to blame for anything so calling it "his" movie seems unfair. The movie belongs to the pop-star called The Weeknd and it came out over the (past) weekend and so did my review of it -- click here to read my review of it. I found some nice things to say -- Trey Edward Shults is a talented director! -- but it's a mess, and that is actually me still being nice. 

G'mornin', Barry

This batch of photos of Barry Keoghan dropped on Friday but I decided to save them here for our Monday morning pick-us-up -- he was photographed by celebrity photographer Greg Williams and interviewed for his site and there are a ton more photos over there if you click on over. These two photos are just, you know, for obvious reasons, my pick o' the litter. We love frisky Barry!

Do Dump or Marry: The New Beatles

Last night at CinemaCon Sam Mendes unveiled the four actors he's cast to play The Beatles in four yes four seperate movies, each one focusing on a single member -- there's Joseph Quinn as George Harrison, Barry Keoghan as Ringo Starr, Harris Dickinson as John Lennon, and Paul Mescal as Paul McCartney. Love all these actors -- you'll see Quinn in Warfare soon enough but that was when I finally decided I am a fan of him -- but as I've probably said on this site a few times over the past twenty years I just do not give a shit about The Beatles. And I don't say that to posture myself as Too Cool or above anything; I recognize that they were an earthquake in music and they have some perfectly good songs but JFC I cannot be bothered. Put their music catalogue or Radiohead's in front of me and I think you can guess where I'll wander. Anyway this will probably turn out to be an interesting expiriment -- telling their story from each point of view -- so if for no other reason we'll be watching. But for right now I invite you to "Do Dump or Marry" these four actors (and as always when there's four feel free to double up on one of those choices) in the comments! (And "Do" = spend one night with; "Dump" = spend zero nights with, and "Marry" equals "spend all the nights with" of course.)

Meet Barley Keoughan

Two of our favorite working actors with fairly similar names -- namely Barry Keoghan and Riley Keough -- who have both worked with Andrea Arnold previously and to great effect (him in Bird and her in American Honey) are next teaming up together! They will star in the next film from Beanpole director  Kantemir Balagov -- as if we needed further proof that these two are the real deal, seeking out real filmmakers making challenging works of art, there we are. I personally felt mixed on Beanpole but it was striking nonetheless and it certainly made Balagov one to keep an eye on. The new movie will be called Butterfly Jam and it's about "a tight-knit U.S. community of Circassian immigrants and a complicated relationship between a father and son, in which the son imbues his father with qualities he doesn’t actually possess." Okay! I'll watch that. And since we're here already hit the jump for a couple bonus shots of Barry that I've never posted before...

And Speaking of Barry Keoghan...

... his movie with the legendary Andrea Arnold directing, the one called Bird, can now be viewed from the comfort of your couch, or your bathtub, or Jacob Elordi's bathtub even, thanks to the fine folks at Mubi. I love love loved this movie (which also stars our other boyfriend Franz Rogowski) when I saw it last fall -- here is my Pajiba review -- and you should expect to see it on my list of favorite 2024 movies whenever I get around to taking five minutes to write that thing down for y'all. It is magic. (pic via)

Chris & Barry Go Down

My memory of the headlines from TIFF was that Bring Them Down, the movie starring Christopher Abbott and Barry Keoghan, was sort of indifferently received (I didn't go to TIFF last year and haven't seen the movie yet myself) -- but checking its score on Rotten Tomatoes just now I see it sits at 93% so I guess my memory was faulty. Not the first time that's happened! Anyway the movie got a trailer this week because it's hitting theaters on February 7th, and that's what I am here for. That's what we all are here for. That plus that photo above of Chris & Barry being touchy-feely natch. 

I wouldn't expect much touchy-feely in the movie itself though, since it's apparently a dark dramatic thriller about feuding Irish shepherds, but who knows? Maybe it's shepherds fueding with sexy results like in God's Own Country. Fingers crossed.

Barry Keoghan Thirteen Times

I've been sitting on my thumbs (I didn't say this was a negative experience) waiting for Arena Homme magazine to drop more of their Barry Keoghan photoshoot that they've been baiting us with for a couple of weeks -- well I think I might have most of it now thanks to the photographers on Instagram (via) and PS these are the same dudes who gave us that immortal Arena shoot of Jamie Dornan, which I like thinking about or mentioning whenever I can. Anyway if more do pop up (like if Arena ever posts the article online) I will update this post with them. But it's another scorcher from our Barry boy so hit the jump and singe your fingertips on these...

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... the wet fag between Paul Mescal's lips.

(via) First off I hope nobody's too irritable about my use of the f-slur lately -- I've dropped it a few times in print over the past several weeks because I've been working through a little bit of a personal reclamation of it and seeing a member of the British Isles smoking a cigarette always gives me an easy out. I am aware obviously (uhh obviously) that it's a loaded term on this continent; it's a word I've mostly avoided using personally, but I don't feel like giving it any power over myself anymore. Clearly a process I should've dealt with earlier in life, but I think we're all feeling ourselves spinning into weird directions that we cannot aniticipate these days and this just happens to be one of mine. Anyway that aside this is a new photo of Paul taken from this set posted last week -- and I think it's safe to say this photo will probably be topping next year's "I Quit Smoking" post, right? I dare the photographers to come up with a better one in the next six months but this is gonna clearly be up there! In summation here is a photo of Paul with Barry Keoghan at the Governors Awards this past weekend: 

A Very Barry Weekend

It's Friday so there are new movies in theaters, and this is the part where I direct you to the ones that I have seen and reviewed. First and fore-best there is Andrea Arnold's Bird, which stars the-pictured-here Barry Keoghan and Franz Rogowski as the influential dudes in teenage Nykiya Adams' life -- Keoghan's her sweet-but-fucked-up dad while Franz is some weirdo she bumps into who starts following her around. Here is my review of that -- gist being I loved it, it's proper Andrea Arnold magic. The other movie out this weekend that I have both seen and reviewed is Heretic, A24's horror film starring Hugh Grant that you're no doubt familiar with given how hard they've been pushing it -- here is my review of that. The gist on that one being the very good performances therein cannot wallpaper over a bunch of intellectually-compromised and deeply conservative bullshit. Especially after Tuesday it feels important to call this shit out -- to me anyway. Lots of critics seem to love it. I saw someone today say it presents both sides -- as in believing and not believing in religion -- equally, and it doesn't force us to choose, and uhhhhhh that's a pretty wild bunch of nonsense to say with a straight face. I'm pretty sure the movie makes us choose when the atheist turns out to be a violent maniac while the Mormon girls he torments all all pure and true-hearted. But what do I know, right? (I know you should go watch Bird, that's what. It will make you feel better, I promise. It's Arnold's by far most optimistic film to date.) 

Morning, World

I am still not quite up to saying "Good Morning" but to each and every one of you reading this I do hope you are good. I appreciate all of the extremely and extraordinarily kind comments on my little bout of word vomit yesterday. It's another day, I am back at my desk, and here are some nice new smiley photos of Barry Keoghan. Let's just try and make it to the weekend without completely falling apart, shall we? We can do it. If for Barry alone!

Have a Happy Halloween!

I better see somebody wearing this tonight.

(I am actually going out to a party if you can believe it!)

Let me know if you wear something neat 

or watch something cool in the comments...

Barry Keoghan Eight Times

Yesterday we got the Franz Rogowski photoshoot and today we get his Bird co-star Barry Keoghan for Port magazine -- well "co-star" is a little bit of a liberal description since the two unfortunately share no scenes in the movie. But they're still technically "co-stars" I suppose. And once you see the movie it makes sense they don't share scenes -- there's a real swapping out of energies between the two, and what their influences mean to the lead character. Anyway! Bird is a very good movie and you should see it when it hits theaters on November 8th. Here is my review of it.  But back to our Barry boy -- it's a good chat with him in Port, read that too. But I've got all of the photos after the jump...

Good Morning, Franz Rogowski

Oh happy day -- as Andrea Arnold's wonderful new film Bird is about to hit theaters (my review here) Another Man magazine has gifted us with a gratuitous photoshoot of our beloved Franz Rogowski for the ages! Not that Franz has ever been a shy one -- outside of all the many many times he's disrobed in his movies he's posted photos of great gratuity on his Instagram and he's given us several other photoshoots of note. He's a generous giver and I feel given to. You should definitely read the interview that goes with these pictures...

... because on that front I learned Franz was raised by parents in a menage a la Passages, that he refuses to identify sexually, and that he got kicked out of clown school. And every single one of those things make sense when it comes to him, right? The writer of the piece is show-offy with how intimate the interview is, mentioning Franz flirting with him during yoga and "applying some pressure to my glute" and then how they went and showered afterwards... not that I wouldn't mention these things too! I am just jealous. So very jealous. But we've at least got these pictures to show for it, even if Franz didn't touch our glutes. (Yet.) Hit the jump for them all... 

Barry Keoghan Flies High

I should have known not to doubt in Andrea Arnold! I went into the Fish Tank director's latest film Bird with a bit of muted anticipation because the reviews I'd seen had been themselves muted, but I ended up love love loving the film when I saw it at NewFest last week -- and now I have written my review and you can read it at Pajiba. Starring both Barry Keoghan and Franz Rogowski -- talk about catnip to me -- along with newcomer Nykiya Adams, the film isadmittedly a stretch for Arnold, in that it's actually in the end a pretty optimistic movie (imagine that!) and it also wades further out into the realm of magical realism than she ever has before. I mention Alice Rohrwacher's movie Happy As Lazzaro in my review and that movie is very much a sibling to this one; if you've seen that movie then you'll know what I mean. Anyway go read my review and go see this movie when it's out in November! On top of everything else it's got what will inevitably be my favorite scene of the year! Here's the trailer:

Barry Keoghan Six Times

Happy birthday, Barry! Barry is 32 today. And not that I had a heap of time since Saltburn to fall out of my Barry Keoghan infatuation but I find it heftily reignited after seeing him in Andrea Arnold's latest film Bird at NewFest earlier this week -- more on that movie soon but he's really wonderful in it (as is the movie as a whole)...

I cannot believe all I’ve seen have been mixed reactions to this movie— I fucking LOVED it. BIRD is top tier Andrea Arnold, funny and observant and surprisingly sweet with what might be my absolute favorite scene of the year pic.twitter.com/8DfcdOTw5U

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) October 16, 2024

... and I know per usual posting Barry snaps I'll get a lot of "he's so funny lookin'" comments but please know I am judging you harshly for those every time because you apparently have no room for "extraordinary talent" in your sexy calculations -- when somebody's as good as what they do as Barry is at acting they level up like 300% sexy-wise, in my eyes. Also... I like funny-lookin. It's called "character" y'all. Anyway yeah Bird is super, stay tuned for my thoughts on Bird, and hit the jump for this new shoot...

It's (Almost) NewFest 2024 Time!

I know I just announced it officially Spooky Season in my previous post, but I don't think I need to differentiate that from Gay Season -- Spooky + Gay is my sweet spot! And it's getting gay now because NYC's premiere queer film festival NewFest has just today announced their full line-up for this year's go-round which runs from October 10th through 22nd. Check it all out right here and pre-order your tickets immediately. A few highlights I will quickly highlight -- the Centerpiece Film is Andrea Arnold's new movie Bird starring Barry Keoghan and Franz Rogowski! I've obviously posted about this movie several times already and I was extremely sad to see it wasn't screening at NYFF, so this inclusion made me giddy -- NewFest starts right as NYFF is finishing so I'll switch right on over and get me some Bird there then! They're also screening Emilia Perez,  Jacques Audiard's new film which won a bunch of prizes at Cannes (this one is also screening at NYFF); oh and they are showing a triple-feature of John Waters movies including Female Trouble for its 50th anniversary! But seriously that barely scratches the surface, click on over here to check it all out. Love NewFest every year!

Pics of the Day

I don't read reviews out of Cannes because I know it will be a very long time before I see the movie and the movie might well change a lot before I do see it and I just don't need all of that noise clouding my head for months. That said I'm having a harder time than usual with Bird, Andrea Arnold's latest which premiered today and which stars my boys Franz Rogowski and Barry Keoghan, who you can see looking swank as fuck at said event above and below. Sigh and swoon, I adore them. Andrea Arnold is SO damned good at casting her movies! Check my previous posts about this highly anticipated movie right here.

What's Under the Suits

It's a good day to troll the Instagram accounts of stylists and the like for photos of their male celebrity clients getting prepped for the Met Gala last night -- I enjoy these moments even more than the red carpet to be honest! Here are photos of Morgan Spector and Barry Keoghan that I have so far stumbled upon -- keep checking this Twitter thread because if I see more of note that's where they will go. Besides the copies I print out to put under my pillow of course.

Pic of the Day

I'm not paying much attention to today's Cannes 2024 fest title drop because what do I care, I am not going and the thought of people going and seeing movies there when I am not annoys me -- I was an only child and I can be indescribably petty, it's all true! It's the same reason I'm ignoring CinemaCon news -- ooh people got to watch footage from Robert Eggers' Nosferatu did they? Well lucky fuckin' them. Nyah nyah nyahhh. All of that said obviously this, the first official photo of Barry Keoghan in Andrea Arnold's next movie Bird -- which co-stars no less than Franz Rogowski! -- caught my eye when Indiewire posted it on their Insta just now. Obviously. (See my previous post here.) Talk about a duo of actors birthed to be in an Andrea Arnold movie! Of course this movie will rule and nobody will know what to do with it because Andrea Arnold will keep being too singular and outré for the establishment (by which I mean awards bodies I suppose), but I can't wait. I mean I will have to wait, unlike those assholes who go to Cannes. God, we hate them.