Honeymoon With Hairy

Things have been relatively quiet on the Jake Gyllenhaal front since his overpriced run on Broadway with Denzel Washington ended (who me bitter), save lots and lots of relatively boring pap-snaps on him on the Rhode Island set of M. Night Shyamalan's next movie. But today -- hark, a new project! He's going to star opposite Kevin Costner in the new movie from directors Glenn Ficarra and John Requa, aka the dudes behind Crazy Stupid Love and the surprisingly wonderful I Love You, Phillip Morris. It's called Honeymoon With Harry and apparently this script has been bouncing around Hollywood for two decades trying to get made -- it's about a a man whose fiancee dies right before their wedding, so he decides to go on their honeymoon... with her father. This is a weird idea for a movie y'all. It's also weirdly close to the plot of Moonlight Mile, Jake's 2002 movie with Dustin Hoffmann and Susan Sarandon that gifted us with a set of pictures like this:

Anyway I assume they're going for a heart-tugging dramedy "guys feeling their feelings" kind of thing but... I don't know. Sounds weird to me! Anyway once upon a time Mike Figgis was going to direct Vince Vaughn and Jack Nicholson in HWH; after that Bradley Cooper and Robert De Niro were attached while Jonathan Demme almost directed it. Lots of talented people circling this, so I guess they all say / see something in it! Meanwhile, me being a very serious person who also feels all of his feelings, all I can picture is this:

Which is Hotter?

I don't always take requests -- not because you people have bad ideas, just because I'm lazy -- but when commenter  Spideu137 left the suggestion to pit Josh Hartnett's evil sexiness in Trap against James McAvoy's evil sexiness in this weekend's Speak No Evil remake, well, that's a good idea! Crazy difficult choice! So pit them against one another I shall!

online polls

That said if they want to make a sequel where the two of them wrestle one another for dominance, I think we'd all accept that offer. Anyway I haven't seen SNE yet -- I had to miss the press screening Monday so I will see it (and review it) over the weekend. I will try to be impartial given what a masterpiece the original is but James sure is making it hard (heh)...

Every time I want to get angry about the SPEAK NO EVIL remake they disarm me with a photo of James McAvoy GET IT "DISARM" BECAUSE HOLY F'ING CHRIST LOOK AT HIS ARMS pic.twitter.com/rORDmc3IUQ

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) September 12, 2024

More Like Thirst Trap

Oh blessings be unto us -- it turns out that tthere are a couple of set photos from the scene where Josh Hartnett's gets shirtless in M. Night Shaymalan's film Trap! I am feeling catered to! In case you missed it the movie is out on digital rental now -- it's a fun time! I enjoyed it. Here is my brief capsule review. Just turn off your brain and you'll have a lot of fun. It's great entertainment and Josh is legitimately fantastic in it. Fantastic whilst looking like this. I won't cry about life not being fair -- I will only appreciate he shares his great fortunes with the rest of us.

Josh Hartnett Three Times

These photos are coming at us via a new chat with the Trap star in the NYT -- read it right here (thx Mac) -- and I recommend clicking on the pictures, because they grow and grow. The pictures, I mean. They're 'uge! And if you missed my brief review of Trap, click here. I found it delightful, and even though my Hartnett-love never waned -- I refer everyone to our archives where I've been celebrating everything he's done over the years from Penny Dreadful to the masterpiece Exterminate All the Brutes -- I am 1000% here for his reinvigorated headliner status.

Now that we're in the middle of a Josh Hartnett Love Fest let's all go watch Raoul Peck's 2021 masterpiece EXTERMINATE ALL THE BRUTES, which is streaming on @StreamOnMax! https://t.co/DH479zu9yO

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) August 6, 2024

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

 ... you can learn from:

The Sixth Sense (1999)

Stanley Cunningham: Philadelphia is one of the oldest cities in this country. A lot of generations have lived here and died here. Almost any place you go in this city has a history and a story behind it. Even this school and the grounds it sits on. Can anyone guess what this building was used for a hundred years ago, before you went to this school, before I went to this school? Yes, Cole?

Cole: They used to hang people here.

Stanley Cunningham: No, uh, that, mm-mm, that's not correct. Uh, where'd you hear that?

Cole: They'd pull the people in, crying and kissing their families 'bye. People watching would spit at them.

Stanley Cunningham: Uh, Cole, this, this building was a legal courthouse. Laws were passed here. Some of the very first laws of this country. This whole building was full of, uh, lawyers, uh, lawmakers.

Cole: They were the ones that hanged everybody.

Happy 25 to M. Night Shyamalan's horror classic! For some reason I resisted loving this movie for a long time, but I have given up that ghost (ha) for awhile now. I think I used to just see it as its twist and nothing more? I don't really even remember now. But Shyamalan's second act as a filmmaker, which I mentioned in my review of Trap yesterday, has me appreciating him more than ever. 

Happy 25 to Toni Collette proving how she can make entire generations of people start sobbing uncontrollably in one minute flat pic.twitter.com/w9MzZZynlY

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) August 6, 2024

Trap in 250 Words or Less

Fantastic fun with a career best performance from Josh Hartnett -- and to any people who might be like "Has Josh Hartnett given a good performance before?" I say begone before somebody drops a house on you. (Also go watch Penny Dreadful and wash your mouths out with soap.) I was honestly totally enthralled by M. Night riffing hard on De Palma -- not just the very obvious diopter shot but this is very clearly his version of Snake Eyes -- and above all just having fun. I think this period of his career, since Old really, will be looked back on with great admiration for how much fun he seems to be having making movies right now. I know he's been compared to Hitchcock his entire career but he has been earning it for the way his movies are pure entertainment machines that're not at all concerned with making "sense" in a logical way over them just being engines for cinematic playfulness. I had a dumb grin on my face the entire run of Trap, from Hartnett's nerdy girl-dadding to Kid Cudi's hilarious turn -- how was he the only person who recognized what a stone-fox they had in their mix? And then for absolutely no reason Shyamalan has Josh take his shirt off for the last act. Pure joy. This movie's pure silly delight.

Tell It To My Hartnett

The big movie out this weekend is M. Night Shyamalan's Trap starring Josh Hartnett -- I have not seen this yet, but I already have my tickets and am going to the theater to do just that over the weekend like a regular ol' person. Nothing will ever keep me from Josh! The fact that I heard they weren't screening this for critics -- I'm not 100% on that since I still only get invited to things about half the time, but I certainly wasn't invited -- is worrisome, but the trailer looks fun... and Josh. I do it all for Josh! Anyway besides that there is the horror movie Cuckoo with Hunter Schafer and Dan Stevens (which is pretty good) and the dark class-comedy Coup! with Peter Sarsgaard and Billy Magnusson (which is not good but Billy looks deeply, incredibly hot in it so it's watchable enough) so maybe you'll see something. Maybe not. I don't know. I am incredibly tired and can't think of clever things to say right now. So I will just bid y'all adieu until Monday -- I might have some more Fantasia reviews going up over the weekend though, so keep an eye on my socials for links. Or don't. It's so hot y'all. I cannot think. Bye. 

5 Off My Head: Toni My Queen

It's Toni Collette's 51st birthday today and you could knock me over with a feather upon the just-now-made realization that I have never done a list of my favorite Toni performances before. Not even for her 50th last year? What the hell was I thinking? Well there's no time like the present. I don't think this list will surprise anybody with my choices given what a vocal supporter of her I've been since I saw Muriel's Wedding way back in '96 and it became basically my number one favorite movie of all time...

... I think the only thing that will surprise is that I didn't up the number to ten or fifteen performances! Because I coulda! And I purposefully decided to leave T.V. performances off because that coulda doubled it again (but seriously, The United States of Tara forever). The fact that I got to hang out with her for a couple of drinks while she was doing press for Hereditary will probably always remain the greatest perk this gig has ever gifted me. That brag aside, here's my list!

My 5 Fave Toni Collette Movie Performances

Sandy, Japanese Story

"To say goodbye."

Annie, Hereditary

"I never wanted to be your mother."

Muriel, Muriel's Wedding

"Why can't it be me? Why can't I be the one?"

Lynn, The Sixth Sense

"Do I make her proud?"

Mandy, Velvet Goldmine

"It's funny how beautiful people look

 when they're walking out the door."

Runners-up: In Her Shoes, The Hours, Knives Out, I'm Thinking of Ending Things, Velvet Buzzsaw, Krampus, Little Miss Sunshine, About a Boy, Clockwatchers, Emma... and all the rest!

-----------------------------------------

What are your favorite Toni Collette performances?

My Hartnett Will Go On

M Night Shyamalan is currently filming his next movie in Canada (he got an interim agreement from SAG) -- it's called Trap and it will star our boy Josh Hartnett! Josh gave one of the best supporting turns in Oppenheimer -- the first Chris Nolan movie I've liked well enough in a very long time (although I will cockblock you from orgasming over it too hard if need be) -- so I'm glad to see him landing another high-profile role. Some of us (cough cough) never stopped following his career, but it doesn't always work out that the ones with genuine talent get a second shot once H'wood's cooled on them. S'pose it doesn't hurt that he's aged so well! Anyway here is all we know about Trap:

"Shyamalan previously described the film as a “psychological thriller set at a concert.” Saleka Shyamalan will play a popstar in the film whose concert is at the heart of the story. Josh Hartnett will play a father who takes his child to a concert, and unwittingly gets caught up in the surrounding events."

And this is the first I am learning that Night's daughter is a professional singer? Is this a thing people knew? Is she actually good and/or successful or have we got some nepo-baby bullshit rearing its head here? Anyway Shyamalan's been on a roll with his last few movies so I hope this one's good. I am incredibly tickled by how the plot makes it sound like Night was traumatized by having to take one of his kids to like a Justin Bieber concert and wrote a script about it. Old man telling at cloud movie ahead!

Which is Hotter?

Ben Aldridge's shoot for Attitude mag is the gift that keeps on gifting! Gifting short shorts, that is. (See the rest here.) This spangly out-take was today brought to my attention, and opens up an opportunity to ask a question that's been bugging me since seeing Ben in M. Night Shyamalan's Knock at the Cabin earlier this year. (And PS for the thousandth time here is my piece on the movie.) If you've seen the movie (and this in itself isn't really a spoiler so don't avert your eyes if you haven't) you know that it offers us both flashbacks and flash-forwards. Which in turn also offers us a look at Young Twink Curly-Haired Ben, as well as Gray-Bearded Daddy Ben. So my question to you inevitably is....

online polls

Pics of the Day

Actor and sexual being Benjamin Aldridge shared some fun set photos for Knock at the Cabin over the weekend via Insta -- one of them I had previously posted but the above snap, with Jonathan Groff feeling up Ben's knee in front of some bookshelves...

... now supplants that one as my fave. Hell it supplants photos of my childhood and family and best friends as a fave. Not sure why he's sharing these now -- it's not out on blu-ray until May (you can pre-order it right here though) but whatever, it presents a good excuse to link to my piece about what the film had to say about gay trauma right here at Mashable. In case you missed it! Anyway there are a few more photos, including lots of hot hugging man-action with Dave Bautista, hit the jump for it...

Pic of the Day

Okay this photo of Ben Aldridge and Jonathan Groff playing papa bears to adorable little Kristen Cui on the set of M. Night Shyamalan's Knock at the Cabin is Too Cute, Too Cute By Ten. If you missed my big piece at Mashable on this movie and on its discussion of gayness and the apocalypse click here and read that. Yes I had mixed feelings on the movie but I wanna see it again as soon as I can, which is a pretty good sign for my future feelings about it.

Quote of the Day

Hey look it's another photo of Ben Aldridge in Attitude magazine -- see the previous bunch here, and really, I recommend it. I hadn't read his chat yet and so I missed that therein he talked about having been in a serious relationship with a closeted famous actor (who he doesn't name) and how their break-up fucked him up -- he went into therapy for it, and found it helpful beyond just that heartbreak stuff and I found this bit of what he said worth sharing:

"You can’t underestimate the trauma of growing up in a world that tells you that you’re disgusting. And I feel like we do the best job of being fabulous, but I think it can wound us deeply, really deeply. More than we can comprehend sometimes.”

I highlight that quote also because it's a good lead-in to linking over to a piece I wrote at Mashable about Ben's new gay horror movie Knock at the Cabin from director M. Night Shyamalan, which went up over the weekend (my piece that is -- the movie's been out for a week now). It's all about the gay trauma of apocalypse talk during our formative years, so fun stuff! But that movie certainly dredged it all up and ended up surprising me some, with how seriously it approached the subject.

Ben Aldridge Seven Times

Knock at the Cabin and Spoiler Alert actor and mustache-rider Ben Aldridge is rocking some short-shorts on the cover of the new issue of Attitude magazine (thx Mac) and readers, I literally choked on my breakfast looking at the cover image seen above. I almost died because of an up-short shadow! That's a new one! (Ed. -- That is not a new one.) Anyway all good tidings and blessings for the new year unto the photographer Kosmas Pavlos who gifted us this shoot -- and if you check his Instagram you'll see he also shot Lucas Bravo this month so he is living the life y'all. (And let's get Ben and Lucas in a swarthy erotic thriller stat!) Aaaaanyway I will have more on Knock at the Cabin coming shortly, but for now let's just enjoy this sexy neon-soaked and stached-up photoshoot. Hit the jump for it...

 

Good Morning, World

M. Night Shyamalan's new movie Knock at the Cabin is out in theaters today -- it stars Jonathan Groff (that's his butt and other bits above on our beloved Looking) and the beautiful and talented Ben Aldridge as a gay couple with a little daughter who must fight off home invaders (including Dave Bautista) who are convinced it's the end of the world. Here is the trailer if you missed it. Anyway I might have had a mixed reaction to the movie (see my tweet at this post's bottom for a brief thought) but it's actually I think a fascinating failure with a whole lot to talk about. I have a piece coming out at some point on some of that over at Mashable (probably Monday because it's spoilery) but as much as I think the movie's let down by its construction I still recommend seeing it. For one...

Ben Aldridge, real deal pic.twitter.com/G8dx5aYu41

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) February 3, 2023

... the actors are all terrific. Ben Aldridge specifically knocked me out -- after killing it in both this and in Spoiler Alert (review here) I am very much Team Ben at this moment in time. For another, and I don't really get into this in my Mashable piece so I can get into it a little here, it's an incredibly smart movie on the COVID pandemic without actually being about that. What it is about is a family trapped inside a house while everyone outside goes crazy with conspiracy theories and the only way they have of keeping abreast of the world is the television and they start becoming convinced themselves of Fake News and Crisis Actors and without pushing any of this directly it is very much about the past few years in ways that impressed me. So ultimately I don't think it fully works as the thriller that it's supposed to be, but as a collection of ideas and ruminations on Our Moment? It's interesting. It's definitely interesting. But we'll talk more next week once my piece is out. (No not that piece, you pervs. That's Groff's job.)

I had EXTREMELY mixed feelings about #KnockAtTheCabin which takes a shit-ton of interesting ideas (and good perfs) & drops them in a really frustrating container. It somehow feels simultaneously over-stuffed & half-baked. I didn't buy it but I also can't stop thinking about it pic.twitter.com/yow85pHs6E

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) February 1, 2023

Knock Knock, Gays There

Getting to this late because of a screening this morning but lo behold we have gotten the first trailer for Knock at the Cabin, the new thriller from M. Night Shyamalan. Now you might be saying to yourselves -- "But Jason! You're of the mind that M. Night hasn't been at the top of his game for a very long time! Why dost thou care?" And first off I don't know why you suddenly went all Shakespearean there at the end but I like it; you should keep that cool shit up. Secondly -- I actually mostly liked Night's last film Old. Until he went as he's wont to do and crawled up his own ass with his complications having complications, anyway. But Old was goofy fun! Most importantly though, Knock at the Cabin stars Jonathan Groff and Fleabag out-gay Ben Aldridge as a pair of Daddys, so obviously I'm gonna talk about this movie. Come on. What am I doing here if not exactly that? They play dads to a little girl who all go to a cabin in the woods when, wham, a group of nogoodniks (including Dave Bautista and Rupert Grint) comes a'knockin. But don't let me describe it poorly, just watch the damn trailer:

Knock at the Cabin is out on February 3rd. What do we think?

The Boys Can't Help it

The two photos I am sharing in this post (via) of actor and former Fleabag-ian Ben Aldridge (mmmmm) are the reason this post is even happening, because as I was prepping it I discovered a shock that almost put a cramp in the entire thing! A wrench in the gears, a punch to the caboose! Okay I don't know what the words falling out of my fingertips are even meaning anymore, let's try getting to the point. I was all set to share the news that "broke" over my week away that Ben here and our boy Jonathan Groff are the stars of M. Night Shyamalan's next movie A Knock at the Cabin that's about a gay couple and their son being confronted by some weirdo strangers (including Dave Bautista and Rupert Grint) who claim the world is ending. The movie is an adaptation of a book, Paul Tremblay's The Cabin at the End of the World, and you can read more details about the book on its Amazon page -- hell maybe you've already read the book and know all the details your own damn self! People like read and shit, it's crazy. Anyway we know more about the plot than we usually do with M. Night things because it's an adaptation -- we'll have to see if he's spiced it up with some twists of his own when the time comes. 

 

Anyway to get back to the shock I mentioned that almost derailed this entire post, if it hadn't been for these photos anyway -- this news isn't really news! I had somehow inexplicably forgotten it but I reported this back in March! How the hell does one forget that Jon Groff and Ben Aldridge are set to play a couple in a horror movie by M. Night? Well in my defense... the world is a hellscape. Really that's the only defense I neeed for forgetting anything these days. But further in my defense -- we didn't actually know in March that Groff & Aldridge were playing a couple in the movie. We didn't know it was going to be an adaptation of this book at all. I even said in my March post that I assumed this movie would be sex-less because all of M. Night's movies are sexless. And I actually still assume it will be in practice sexless. But just Jon & Ben playing a couple in front of me, that will go a long way toward making me, you know, think about sex, despite Night's best efforts to tamp that shit down. I mean I posted a photo of Jonathan Groff fully dressed on Twitter earlier today and (see below) Twitter put a content warning on the tweet! That's how much sex Groffy exudes just by existing. He can overcome M. Night no prob!

This photo of Jonathan Groff that his Looking costar Frankie Alvarez posted last night, phew pic.twitter.com/AOPSLrFZGW

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) July 20, 2022

When the Groff's A'Knockin...

The good movie news today is that a double dose of hot homosexuals have been cast in M. Night Shyamalan's next movie -- good so far as the "hot homosexuals" part goes; I'm not so sold on Shyamalan these days but we'll take what we can get. The homos of choice are Jonathan Groff and former-Fleabag-ian Ben Aldridge (see our previous posts on Ben here), who are joining Dave Bautista and Rupert Grint in Knock at the Cabin, a thriller which... probably involves a cabin, who knows. M. Night's not saying. There will be knocking? One hopes of the bedpost-against-wall sort with Ben & Jon specifically, but Night's movies are always sexless so I have my doubts on that front. Dare to dream. In related news...

... Ben's Fleabag queen Phoebe Waller-Bridge has set up a new series at Amazon! And like with M. Night's movie we know absolutely nothing about it! But it's great news all the same. She should make it about a throuple played by Ben, Andrew "Hot Priest" Scott, and her Crashing co-star Jonathan Bailey. I know I know they are all very similar looking white gay men but... I'd still want to see that. Who wouldn't want to see that? If you wouldn't want to see that you just hate fun. 

Jonathan Bailey, Netflix and #Bridgerton respecting the time honored tradition of hot fops getting out of the water in soaking white shirts within period-storytelling you love to see it pic.twitter.com/uueTss6eiW

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) March 2, 2022

Aaron Pierre Five Times

Jiminy Crickets, where did Aaron Pierre even come from? I guess he was on that show Krypton, but all of a sudden this year he's gone and wham-bammed us with the two-fer of Barry Jenkins' masterpiece of a series The Underground Railroad (which I just shared some new news on yesterday) as well as playing the immediately iconically named character "Mid Sized Sedan" in M. Night Shyamalan's film Old (reviewed here). Quality-wise one of these things is not like the other, but that's still a high profile year and then some... and I sure ain't complaining given what a pleasure it is to look at Aaron Pierre. So let's! Hit the jump for more...

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Leave No Trace (2018)

Tom: What if the kids at school think I'm strange 

cuz of the way we were living?

Will: How important are their judgments?

A very happy 21st birthday to Thomasin McKenzie today! This Debra Granik movie definitely marks the moment I fell for her -- I imagine it's the moment most of us fell for her, if you saw it -- but it's kind of nuts to look at how many projects of note that she's stacked up in the past three years since this brought her to our attention. Why she was in M. Night Shyamalan's film Old just this weekend (read my review here) and she was very good in it in a difficult part; before that there were small roles in The King and True History of the Kelly Gang and of course the biggie, Jojo Rabbit.  

What's your favorite from her so far? The next year holds some good or at least exciting stuff -- she's in Jane Campion's new film The Power of the Dog, and I've already seen The Justice of Bunny King thanks to Tribeca (and I reviewed it too, right here) and she is wonderful in that, but it's Edgar Wright's giallo-riff Last Night in Soho with her playing opposite Anya Taylor-Joy that I'm obviously the most looking forward to; the trailer can be viewed right here. That's out on October 22nd! The happiest of happy birthdays to her and please keep the hits coming, Thomasin!