Give This Piece a Chance

I'm trying to will the care-free mood seen in this photo of Charles Melton into my own existence today -- spoiler alert: it ain't working. I don't know if my partner was punching me in the side of the head all night long as I slept (no this is not a cry for help) but I woke up feeling like I didn't sleep a single second last night, and I be draggggggging my ass this Thursday. This is pointless information for anyone who isn't "me" I know but it's good that I remind myself that this site is just a stupid fucking blog sometimes and I don't have to feel bad about insubstantial content. Tis my prerogative! Is it weird that typing that word out always makes me want to eat pierogies? In summation -- aren't you glad you just wasted one minute of your life reading this post? You're welcome. Any time. 

ETA Just got word my office is closing tomorrow so I am officially giving up for the long weekend. Hands in air, Jason don't care. I'm headed to a screening in half an hour (Backrooms baby!) and then I'm off until Tuesday. I should add since we're doing Accounting Of My Time here that NewFest and Tribeca Fest stuff start plaguing / entertaining me next week so my schedule's about to get nuts again -- on the positive side Summer Fridays at my day-job also kick off... well tomorrow now, I guess. Which means four-day weeks through Labor Day. Yes I am rambling! Let me ramble! I have half an hour to kill and need to stop fussing over my Tribeca schedule, which is much of what I've been working on this week. Anyway stay tuned -- coverage of those fests and lots more to come! Probably including me choking to death on my own bile! Have a great holiday weekend! Think of me like this (if you think of me at all):

Private Hells For Everybody!

Nicholas Winding Refn's latest movie Her Private Hell starring Sophie Thatcher and Charles Melton among others is about to premiere at Cannes, so today they dropped the teaser -- Thatcher and Melton (and Charles Melton's tits) are the main focus of it so I am assuming they're the main characters, our leading lady and lad. And tits.

As I told you back on the 1st we don't have forever ages to go until we can see this ourselves -- Neon is releasing it on July 24th. Thank goodness. Looks like a perfect Summer Movie -- really all Refn movies are Summer Movies. Everybody is hot and sweaty and mean. Anyway the teaser gives away very little -- just showcases NWR's style, the real star of the show, so feel free to watch: 

Bisexual Lighting: The Movie

We have a U.S. release date for Nicolas Winding Refn's first movie in a decade y'all! Her Private Hell will be opening on July 24th thanks to the stellar folks at Neon -- this will be after it bows at Cannes this month for those bastards who go to Cannes. (Fuck you, bastard people.)  I've posted about this movie a lot previously because duh -- we fucking worship NWR. But this thing's also got one of his most gorgeous casts (which is saying a lot given his last movie that had both Alessandro Nivola and Karl Glusman in its cast) -- Sophie Thatcher, Charles Melton, Havana Rose Liu, Diego Calva, Drive My Car star Hidetoshi Nishijima, Parker Sawyers aka...

... the beautiful man who had lots of sex with Henry Golding in the movie Monsoon. Also the model Lola Corfixen and the oldest person in the cast, one Dougray Scott, who nevertheless remains very much fuckable at 60 years old. And listen -- not every movie needs to star a cast of nothing but hotties. But I do look at the ones that do -- the ones being shot by a hyper-stylist like Refn especially -- as extra special gifts. Let's hope that NWR used his decade off making the most gloriously obtuse and sexy disturbing television shows since Twin Peaks as perverted fuel for this big-screen return!

Charles Melton Two Times

Given the photoshoots that Charles Melton had been dropping in the build-up to Beef's return (including this very morning's new speedo snap) these two photos admittedly feel a bit tame, but we don't love Chuck for just his body. Let me say it a second time so he will mentally note this for when we eventually meet and fall in love -- I don't love you for just your body, Charles! (Do you think he bought it?) No seriously he is very very funny on Beef -- have any of you watched it yet? The reaction's been more muted than the first season but I think I actually prefer season two, to be honest, the further I get away from it. It's a grower. Speaking of... ahem. 

Good Morning, World

I cannot believe that Men's Health has been sitting on yet ANOTHER photo of Charles Melton and his little black speedo all this time! It's been twelve days -- twelve excruciating days!! -- since we saw the last ones. (See them all here.) Haven't they seen the world falling apart all this time? Didn't they understand we needed rescuing? Well we got this one (via) so perhaps this will steer us back toward heaven. They could, I don't know, just drop a new one of these every single day for the foreseeable future -- just spitballing here. (Hear that, Charles. Spitballing.) Gahh filthy innuendoes aside, the real real is that I've got a screening this morning so you'll just have to stare at that photo until I'm back. So spitball that!

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Three More Meltons!

How dumb am I (full stop) to've thought that we'd seen the last of the Charles Melton in Men's Health photos after I'd spent half the past week posting, you know, literally hundreds of them. When I posted that hot one yesterday I really thought that'd be that since Beef was now out on Netflix. (Have you watched any? Can we talk about the coyote scene yet???) Thankfully I am the stupidest peron who has ever lived or will ever live, and three more photos have come via MH's Instagram in the past day or so.  So now I'm gonna be smart and say this won't be it -- I'm gonna guesstimate that they're holding on to five thousand more photos to share, and that'll prove my smarts! I'll show you! Okay go watch Beef so we can talk about the coyote scene, the end. Oh and hit the jump for the rest of these pictures as well I suppose...

Good Morning, World

I literally posted nearly 200 images from Charles Melton's Men's Health photoshoot and video on Monday -- seriously, go see for yourself!!! -- and yet somehow I totally missed this fairly straightforward (yet no less sexy) image right there above? What a world, what a world indeed. Anyway it's a good thing because the second season of Beef is out on Netflix today and why wouldn't I post about that? For one I've been pretty relentlessly plugging it for months now because of its incredible cast. And for another I've actually already watched the whole damn thing! And it's good! I think it might be a little more unfocused than the first season, but all of the leads are excellent, with Mr. Melton and OF COURSE Carey Mulligan being the stand-outs from where I stand. For his part Melton is hysterically funny and surprisingly moving, proving that May December was no fluke; he's the real deal. As much talent as he's got abs! And as for Mulligan... 

Carey Mulligan is one of those notable few performers who, when I think about how much I love watching them perform, I literally well up. I feel immense gratitude every time she acts. I'm basically Team She Can Do No Wrong. What an immense talent she wields. A queen.

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) April 15, 2026 at 4:52 PM

... well as you see above I'm of the mind that Carey Mulligan is incapable of being anything less than absolutely 100% compelling on-screen, and every single time the camera focuses on her here she proves her exquisite skill yet again. I am in awe of her, really and truly -- I'm not quite ready to de-throne the dueling Frenchies of Binoche & Huppert as my picks for the Greatest Living Actresses, but every time I watch Carey Mulligan I question that. I do! She's just so spectacular. Anyway you should watch the new season, it's mostly terrific, and I won't spoil it but there is one moment involving Carey and a wild animal that will probably end up being the funniest thing I see all year. All that plus Charles Melton spends every episode half-naked, as highlighted in the below trailer? What are you even doing here? Get over to Netflix, you fools!

This is literally the only advertisement Netflix needed to make for Beef's second season

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) April 15, 2026 at 2:04 PM

Charles Melton Six (Plus) Times

You know I am just sitting here innocvently at my desk, just got to work, I start eating my breakfast cereal and I open up instagram and WHAM I am almost choked to death on a Cheerio by these photos of Charles Melton for Men's Health magazine suddenly smacking me upside the face. Obviously this is a rhetorical question and either way the answer is a defiant NO...

... but wasn't almost murdering us with that slutty i-D magazine photoshoot enough, Charles? I'm not getting any younger and there;'s only so much my heart can take. But I belabor a stupid argument -- obviously this is the good sort of surprise. Charles is making our Mondays brighter! Hit the jump for all the photos we've got so far (I do assume more will come because they always do)...

Charles Melton Ten (Plus) Times

The second season of Beef had its premiere last night (click here to see some photos of Oscar Isaac and our half-naked boy here on the red carpet) and Charles Melton is not letting this moment get by without dropping a bomb of LOOK AT ME on us all -- this photoshoot for i-D magazine that just dropped this morning...

... practically knocked me off my chair, it did! I'll have things to say about Beef next week when it premieres (on April 16th) since I've already watched the entire thing but for now I'm just shutting up and letting these fiery fucking photos do the talking. Hit the jump for 'em all...

Good Morning, Gratutious Charles Melton Cont.

I don't know if you guys have been paying attention or scrolling down but that post of Charles Melton photos for L'Officiel Hommes that I posted on Wednesday has been getting bigger and bigger by the day -- you might say it's been swelling, engorging even -- as, predicatably, more photos have landed. I'd said that would probably happen, and it did, and once again I have proven my worth. Not that anyone notices! Ahem. Anyway even more landed last night but it didn't feel right to toss these off into the bottom of that ever expanding post anymore -- especially since these shots somehow, inexplicably, keep getting...

... hotter and hotter by the day. And if they're going to be this generous than I will too. So here, a second post! You've earned it, Charles. No but really, though -- I can't say much about it because I'm embargoed but I got the screeners for the second season of Beef this week, which is what Charles is promoting with this photoshoot (it lands on April 16th) and... believe me, you guys, Charles earns it. Charles earns everything. Beef season two is a veritable smorgasbord of Charles Melton in short shorts, and less. I'm only two episodes in and... heaven. Anyway! Don't tell anybody I said that. And as your silence's reward hit the jump...

Charles Melton Seventeen Times

I can already tell that I'm jumping on Charles Melton's new photoshoot for L'Officiel Hommes magazine too quickly and that there are going to be more photos dropped today, this week, eventually -- you can see a few of them scattered about in the menus at the link above -- but, I'm sorry. It's Charles Melton. You jump on Charles Melton the second, the literal second, you've got the chance to jump on Charles Melton. 

Am I wrong? I thought not. Anyway this shoot is promo for the second season of Beef of course -- click here if you missed that trailer. That show premieres on Netflix on April 16th and I for one am extremely excited for it. Also exciting me this morning -- this shoot, which is a non-stop tribute to Charles Melton's big beefy beautiful legs. So come, jump on them with me after the jump...

Melton's Meat-y Part

Season two of Netflix's successful series Beef is creep creeping creeping ahead -- indeed it's only about six weeks off now (it premieres on April 16th) which means we've just gotten the first teaser for it, which I will dutifully share with you down below. Most importantly though we must first post every new images of Charles Melton without hius clothes on, and...

... done. (See previous sexiness here.) This season swaps out Steven Yeun and Ali Wong and their ever-escalating parking-lot dispute to have Oscar Isaac and Carey Mulligan playing a couple who come into conflict with a couple played by Melton and Cailee Spaeny, all at a fancy country club. Great actors, looking pretty and cruel, I'm all over this shit. Here's the tease:

Charles Melton Three Times

I have chosen to believe that Charles Melton received career advice from his May December co-star Natalie Portman while making that Todd Haynes masterpiece and that's why he's become the "fashion brand ambassador" for several brands in the past couple of years -- not because I don't trust Charles to make his own choices, but it entertains me whenever I think about those ridiculous Natalie Portman perfume commercials for Dior and it makes me chuckle picturing her taking him aside and saying, "This. Do this." Anyway these new photos for Davidoff (thx Mac) are hot as fuck -- no surprise given it's a topless Charles Melton! I probably prefer the sweatier stachier Coach commercial he did just because I have my own personal fetishes but either way god he pretty. Hit the jump for them all...

Pics of the Day

Unbelievably the last time I posted about the second season of the hit Netflix series Beef -- which will focus on totally different characters than the first one, making this an anthology show I suppose! -- it was way back in October of 2024, to deliver the bad news that Brokeback buddies Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway had dropped out. But the news wasn't that bad! Because those two were replaced by Charles Melton and Cailee Spaeny, and we fucking love Charles Melton and Cailee Spaeny. 

Well now we've got movement because our first photos have at last arrived, along with word that the show -- which also stars a little pair of somebodies named Oscar Isaac and Carey Mulligan, since this season focuses on two couples at war with one another -- will drop on April 16th. Thrills! Also I'd be remiss to not underline that photo above of Charles Melton, rocking a stache and not much else. And with that important point em phasized now let's hit the jump for several more of these first look photos of the cast...

And Now Charles Melton Wishes You...

... a very very Happy New Year!
(More pictures here.)

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

 ... you can learn from:

Bronson (2008)

Bronson: How would you feel, waking up in the morning without a window? My window is a steel grid, I 'ave to put my lips against that steel grid and suck in air, that's my morning... 'cause I got no air in my cell. I have to eat, sleep and crap in that room twenty-three hours of a twenty-four hour day. You tell me, what human being deserves that? Apart from the stinking paedophile or a child killer. I don't deserve that, I done nothing on this planet to deserve that. My bed is four inches off the floor, it's a concrete bed, my toilet hasn't even got a seat on it or a lid, and I 'ave to live like this month after month after month, and the way it's looking it's year after year after year. Now is that's right then so be, but let somebody else 'ave a fucking go at it, 'cause I've had twenty-six years of this bollocks and it's time to come out, and I want the jury at my trial to come and see how I'm living. But I'm not living, I'm existing.

A very happy 55 to our beloved neon mad genius Nicholas Winding Refn today! This is a good moment to remind us all that we will be getting a new movie from him next year -- I told you about his film Her Private Hell back in April when Charles Melton joined the cast, but by all accounts they've already filmed the thing so I'm assuming a next year release. It also stars current it girl Sophie Thatcher (of Companion and Heretic and Yellowjackets fame), plus Drive My Car hunk Hidetoshi Nishijima, Diego Calva, Kristine Froseth, Dougray Scott, and Havana Rose Liu from Bottoms and Lurker. This is one drop-dead gorgeous cast y'all. Can't wait for NWR to douse them all with blood and glitter.

Good Morning, World

The internet is so fast! Pew pew! (Those are computer noises.) We just plow forward, ever forward. No time to breathe. And so sometimes I drop something amazing on here and within a week we've all moved on. That's sad! Especially when the thing I dropped was a half-naked mustachioed Charles Melton jumping rope. Especially that. And I shared a Coach commercial on the 17th that was exactly that and it was all the rage inside these Pants of mine for a good 48 hours, by which time approximately ten million other things (ninety-nine percent of them being awful, let's be real, it's 2025) had shoved its wonder outta the way. That's sad!

But it don't got to be! Because yesterday during my "browsing" -- aka scanning the usual places for filth I might've missed -- I discovered that two set videos of said commercial had been dropped after the original commercial! And they give us a little more half-naked mustachioed Melton to stare at. Slow down and smell the Melton, I say! Along with last night's mayoral primary here in my hometown of NYC everything's coming up so nice this morning! It's such a weird feeling. It won't last. So let's enjoy it while it's here. Hit the jump for ten or so more gifs (and the videos)...

Good Morning, World

Nico Greetham and Charles Melton ask

that you to have a very nice Thursday. 

Do it for them!

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... jumping all over Charles Melton.

The wise wise folks over at Coach decided to hire actor Charles Melton to be the mustachioed face (and body) of their latest sneaker campaign and I know I keep saying this whenever anything positive and good happens lately but -- we deserve this. With all the otherwise general shittiness going on this is truly an actor using their power for good. Think of him as our version of Shirley Temple during the Great Depression. His abs are our Busby Berkeley, baby. Hit the jump for more gifs and the video...

Charles Melton Twelve Times

I got really panicky yesterday afternoon because I suddenly realized I have so much work to get done this week and not nearly enough time to get through it all -- especially with a four-day weekend ahead where I'll be otherwise occupied. But then I saw these photos of Charles Melton for GQ this morning and you know what? Everything is gonna be okay. Look at Charles Melton: 

We live in a world full of beautiful things. They can try to make us lose our minds but goodness and prettiness will always come up through the cracks. So yes I guess what I am saying is that Charles Melton is a dandelion in an apocalyptic wasteland. Thanks, Chuck! So y'all breathe deep and hit the jump for the entire photoshoot...