Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Algernon Peters
Bought odor-eaters
He put them in his boots
And the pockets of his suits

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Can an emu
Moo?
Can an aardvark
Bark?

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

When his horse grew leaner
The judge named it "Subpoena"
Then he christened his porpoise
That's right, "Habeas corpus"

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

If you live near Wonthaggi
Your jeans won’t be baggy
But near Castlemaine
High heels are a pain

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

A cowboy by the name of William Scooter
Accidentally sat on the sheriff’s six-shooter
But had he sat on a cactus (like Kevin)
He too might have ascended into heaven

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

An electrician named Errol
Put the whole town in peril
When he lost a lot of money on the colts
And stopped concentrating on the volts

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Professor Turner
Lit the bunsen burner
But the angle of his pose
Meant that he singed his nose

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

You should never feed gumbo
To a ruminating jumbo
And you mustn't serve tzatziki
To a horse that's looking peaky

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

If Wee Willie Winkie
Is running through the town
And you’re not tired or blinky
You’ll really make him frown

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Said Samson to Delilah
"I think you need a styler"
So while he slumbered, his days were numbered
With his shaven head, he was encumbered

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

He coveted a tux
Without paying big bucks
So he bought Hugo Boss
And claimed a tax loss

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

The mayor’s daughter Betty
Went to the Serengeti
There she dined on wildebeeste
Cooked in butter with a spoon of yeast

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

The merchant of menace
Paraded round Venice
But his shoes and his jacket
Were worth quite a packet

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

With all practicality
Just celebrate hilarity
Let’s pledge to end the dearth
Of widespread spontaneous mirth

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Is there a word that rhymes with "highway"?
Not unless you consider my way
Is there a word that rhymes with "marbles"?
Apart (that is) from Aesop’s farbles

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

He caught the ferry
To Pondicherry
And found inner peace
On a two-year lease

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

I once walked the plank
With a pirate called Hank
But he fell in the ocean
And raised a commotion

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Governor Walker bought a fat porker
Before he was transferred to Majorca
He crafted a collar from rope and twine
But sold it for a dollar to an uncultured swine

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

If you bare your solar plexus
On the streets of Paris, Texas
You’ll be slapped with a fine in double-quick time
Before the town clock has had time to chime

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Can you fit an alligator
In a dusty lunar crater?
And can you move a crocodile
Inch by inch, across the Nile?