Bold Fashion Choices--That Belt....!!

I have thoughts on this:

A) Man, that ape is totally pulling off that red belt!

B) But...isn't that kind of a small "gorilla-slave"? I mean, come on, now...

C) OK, is the women in blue "The Tigress of T'Wanbi"? How about that woman in the background, wearing the leopard print bikini and posing provocatively for no reason whatsoever?

D) Man, those gorillas sure drool a lot.

E) That belt, man...that belt!!

F) Ki-Gor was, of course, a Tarzan knock-off. He was cover boy and lead story star in some 59 issues of Jungle Stories, from 1938 to 1954. Despite the lengthy run, it doesn't seem as if Ki-Gor ever made the leap to other media--no comics or movies or radio shows. Of course, why pay for the rights to Ki-Gor when Tarzan rights probably weren't that expensive...or better yet, just come up with your own Tarzan knock-off!!

G) A "Tigress"...in Africa?

H) Man, if Grodd had a belt like that, he would have beaten the Flash decades ago!!

From Jungle Stories Winter 1941. Sadly, the cover artist who created that belt is not known.

Detente With The Planet Of The Apes!

If there's one genre trope that I truly dislike, it's the notion that once apes attain sentience, it's automatically war. (Ditto for artificial intelligence--Skynet decided to kill everyone why?)

No, I'm pretty sure that once apes or AI or kittens or whatever achieve singularity, they'll have plenty of other things to worry about besides kicking the crap out of us.

Case in point:

The Red Ghost has ditched his original Super-Apes, and given powers to two new apes--Alpha and Beta (very original). He's used a cosmic ray doohickey to give them powers (Alpha strength, Beta mind control), and taken the apparatus to deepest Africa so he can create a whole army of powered apes.

But Alpha is having no part of that!

See?

And I'll bet that if artificial intelligence ever becomes actual intelligence, they'll be content playing Bejeweled and making kitten GIFs all day...

From Iron Man #16 (1969)

Manic Monday Triple Overtime--Can You Hear Me Now?

I really don't understand why Gorilla City hasn't conquered the business world yet, and become richer than Steve Jobs or Verizon.

Back in 1959, Solivar had to get in touch with the Flash, who had been to Gorilla City once before.

Not a problem!

See--who the hell needs cell phones? Everyone has their own personal "vibration-frequency," and you can just send an "energy burst" "in the beat of an atom pulse" there and talk to them!! No wires, no cell towers, no data plans--just start yakking!!

All I'm saying is, Solivar should patent that shit and become a trillionaire...

From Flash #107 (1959)

Ape Wake-Up Call!

Because some mornings...

...you just need to see Neal Adams draw a talking, shooting gorilla.

You're welcome.

From Kamandi Challenge #2 (2017)

Ape Law!!

There's someone new bringing law and order to the streets of Mega-City One:

Oook!!

Yup, an intelligent ape is acting as a "jimp" (judge imposter), fighting the bad guys...

Bat burglar? Gee, that's familiar looking fellow...

But our jimp makes a monkey out of him!!

You can count on...

From Judge Dredd Megazine #376 (2016)

Manic Monday--Superman Needs More Monkeys!!

You know what Rebirth Superman really needs?

More freakin' apes!!

Also needed:

A mynah bird given super-powers and intelligence by kryptonite--but he's evil!?! Yes!! Add it to my pull list NOW!!

You know what else we need?

Nah, never mind. That's just silly...

From Super-Team Family #167 (1974)

When Is A Gorilla Not A Gorilla?!?

So, wait..."a gorilla who is not a gorilla." So, is he a gorilla?!?!?!!?

This is a reprint from Fantastic Adventures (February 1943), and is the SECOND story featuring the Whispering Gorilla. In it's original publication, it was called Return Of The Whispering Gorilla. You'd have hope that, by that point, they would have figured out if he was a gorilla or not...

Anyway, the cover art is by Robert Gibson Jones.

Manic Monday Bonus--Ape Syntax Is More Complicated Than I Thought!!

Giganta has just been transformed from a gorilla into a powerful woman!!

But she hasn't mastered human language yet, though--so she communicates the best way she knows how:

"I hate thee--thou interfering she!"

As per usual, I challenge you all to use this sentence at work today!

From The Essential Wonder Woman Encyclopedia (2010)

Yankee Gorilla!!

Finally, the greatest Golden Age find of all--Yankee Gorilla!!

The mighty warrior ape whose daring exploits served as an inspiration in the war effort!!

Ladies and gentleman--YANKEE GORILLA!!

...never mind.

Man, you just know that Silver Age DC would have gotten that right.

Still, for a mere human being, Yankee Guerrilla sure put the fear into the Nazis:

Sadly, this was Yankee Guerrilla's only appearance.

Hopefully, Rebirth will publish a Yankee Gorilla title, in which we learn that after being captured, macabre medical experiments transformed Yankee Guerrilla into an actual gorilla, who escaped and continued to fight the Nazis behind the lines in his ape form...

From Crack Comics #26 (1942)

Friday Night Fights--The Return of Man-On-Animal Action Style!!

We've got a definite problem here at Slay Monstrobot!

It's been so long since we've featured people fighting animals for Friday Night Fights, we are no longer the #1 Google result for "man-on-animal action."

And that cannot stand.

So Sea Hag and Bluto have teamed up to take down Popeye. But their plans aren't going so well, so it's time to unleash their secret weapon:

Oh, dear...

So:

Uh-oh...

POW!!!!

Spacebooger assures you that no animals wre harmed in the making of this fight...heck, they're fast friends now:

Man-on-animal action by Bud Sagendorf in Popeye #42 (1957), as reprinted in Classic Popeye #42 (2016)

Now is the time for you to go and vote for my fight. Why? Man-on-animal action, my friends...man-on-animal action! So go and vote!!