The Sound of The 70s!!

It's open mic night!!

So pull up a chair, have a mochachino, and listen to the music stylings of Rick Jones:

The ladies love it, too!

But there's always a heckler...

Dude, maybe you shouldn't heckle a guy who was taught to fight by Captain America?!?

Make that--you definitely shouldn't heckle a guy who was taught to fight by Captain America!!

Later, Rick is a superstar on the rise!!

No doubt about it--

Rick Jones--better than Snapper Car in every possible way!!

From Captain Marvel #18 (1969) & #20 (1979)

Tuesday Morning Battle Royale!!

Thanks to "scientific" jiggery pokery from Dr. Destiny, it's time for a battle royale between a heapin' horde of villains and the Justice League!

If you're not familiar with everyone, in the top panel there it's Mr. I.Q. (Yes, Hawkman only has lame villains), Penguin, Captain Boomerang and Doctor Light.

The lower panel has Lex Luthor, Cutlass Charlie (yes, Aquaman only has lame villains), the Tattooed Man, Jason Woodrue (yes, he throws plants at people), and Doctor Destiny.

Fortunately, the Justice League pulls the old "switch up opponents" trick, which works pretty well...

Yes, Snapper Carr knocked out the Tattooed Man.

Any way...

....it's a pretty easy fight, and all that's left...

...is for Green Lantern to sweep up.

Thank you, Mike Sekowsky & Sid Greene.

From Justice League Of America #61 (1968)

Snapper Carr Is No Rick Jones

Snapper Carr--what a loser.

I say this not to be mean. But seriously, the guy sets the record for undeserved self-pity.

As a high school student, Snapper helped the Justice League Of America beat Starro. I mean, they make him an honorary member after that--a high school kid who gets to hang with the Justice League, for heaven's sake!! Dude ranked higher on the pecking order than most of the Teen Titans, is all I'm saying.

And yet he decides to throw it all away. Feeling unappreciated, Snapper allows the Joker (in disguise) to convince him that all super-heroes are dangerous, and gives Joker the JLA's secret HQ location.

Yes, that really happened. (And, if you were to ask me, I've decided that that event marks the end of the Silver Age...Not a hoax, not a dream, but the guy who has hung with the JLA since day one betrays them to DC's greatest villain because he buys into "heroes are bad for society". Definitely the beginning of the Bronze Age.)

After that? Well, let his sister Janet narrate for us:

I'll try not to get repetitive here, but after every one of these panels, do a mental comparison with Rick Jones, OK?

Fair enough. But those changes?

"Bull-ticky"?!?!?!

Wait.

Let's stop right here. Your fellow students ask you a few harmless and well-intentioned questions about the super-heroes you personally knew...and you "can't study" and "drop out"?!? I mean, sheesh, someone has the excuse machine cranked up to 11.

Back to the panel...
Really? You couldn't find any job? Not the Post Office? Not a dish washer? You couldn't, say, enlist in the military?? Mowing lawns? Anything?!?

Well, there's only one solution...

Seriously, Snapper Carr dropped out of school because someone asked him if Wonder Woman was hot, and then couldn't finds a job worthy of him...so he applies for welfare? But that wasn't quite down and out enough:

Maybe fame worked differently in the DC Universe.

Rick Jones, after all, wrote a bestselling book about being a sidekick, became a rock star, had his own TV talk show, became sponsor of a support group for former teenage super-heroes, etc, etc.

Snapper Carr, however, just became a loser...

Wait...his address was "disconnected"?!?

And then Carr went on to join The Key and became the super-villain Star-Tsar, which earns double demerits for the ridiculous stupidity of that name.

Over a decade later, they began to refurbish Snapper, giving him super-powers, having him mentor Hourman and Young Justice and join Checkmate and yada yada. And who knows when/if we get the nu52 Snapper Carr,

But man oh man, Snapper will always be that whiny betraying loser to me.

These panels were all from Justice League Of America #150 (1978)

THIS REALLY HAPPENED--Blasters!!

And then there was the time that the Dominators gave Snapper Carr super powers (he could teleport, but only when he snapped his fingers!), and he formed a pretty lame super team, and they gave him his own book:

THIS REALLY HAPPENED!!!

Now, I'm not sure what the point of rebooting your whole damned universe if you're not going to bring back Snapper Carr and The Blasters. In the Third Wave, maybe?!?