It's Jeopardy's Fault!!

Look, everyone, the Mysterious Traveler is going to tell us what's wrong with the modern world!!

Oh, it's all television's fault...?

That's a little trite, isn't it? Can you be more specific?

OK...this had better be good, you Phantom Stranger wannabe!

OK, quiz shows...so what?

Well, superstar pollster Jack Hoyt has noticed something disturbing...

After a few weeks...

So quiz shows make people feel stupid, because they feature smart people?

Oh, it's much worse than that!

Ken Jennings is responsible for our current terrible state!!

Well, Jack tries to warn the networks bosses, but you can probably guess how that went...

But maybe there's hope?

Homer Evriman is a hit!

But everyone perceives him differently!

See?

The results, however, are amazing...

Jack goes to meet this Mr. Evriman...

Man, this story explains so much...So when does our Homer Evriman show up?

From Tales Of The Mysterious Traveler #6 (1957)

Manic Monday Bonus--Because It's There?

The Phantom Stranger The Mysterious Traveler looks on as man is finally going to conquer the world's tallest peak:

Oh, there's lots (and lots) of struggle:

Yet finally, our climber makes it!

But...

...wait for it...

What...?

O....K.

As cockeyed conspiracy theories go, this one is kind of odd. After all, this story was published several years after the first successful ascent of Everest. Were we really supposed to believe that it wasn't really a successful ascent, that it was all faked to prevent "men's spirits" from being "crushed" by the "revelation" that there was really another peak "ten times higher" atop Everest?

That's some seriously Capricorn One stuff there, dudes. Next you'll have the Mysterious Traveler telling us that Phileas Phogg didn't really make it around the world in 80 days!

From Tales Of The Mysterious Traveler #5 (1957)

Manic Monday Triple Overtime--Martians Are Gassy!!

OK, you bright want to grab a hold of something, because The Mysterious Traveler is about to break the poisonous panes of preconception that form your little glass house, America!

Yeah, dummies!! You always thought Mars was solid!!! Ha ha ha, you stupid fools!! This will teach you to believe scientists and space probes rather than a mysterious unnamed man in a trench coat!! 

And Martians are gassy!!

Awful danger?!?

OK, now I'm beginning to doubt the scientific accuracy of this story...

From Tales Of The Mysterious Traveler #2 (1957)

Manic Monday Triple Overtime--Don't You Just Want To Punch This Guy?

The Phantom Stranger is one of my least favorite characters--smug, preachy, whiny, and either completely worthless in a conflict or deus-ex-machina-pull-a-rabbit-out-of-his-cape insanely powerful when the story called for it.

Depending on how you look at things, he was probably sorta kinda based (maybe) on The Mysterious Traveler, a character who originated as the omniscient narrator star of his self-titled 1943-1953 radio series. He had a one-shot comic published in 1948, and a digest-sized pulp magazine in 1951-52. Then Charlton published a comic from 1956-1959.

Phantom Stranger, meanwhile, had six issues in 1952, and then was revived by DC in 1969.

Obviously, they bear a lot of similarities, including dress, and occasional omniscient narrator over horror anthologies positions. Given the overlapping dates, it could be a Man-Thing/Swamp Thing situation.

Still, Mysterious Traveler was much less annoying, much more tolerable, and...

Never mind. I want to kick his smug ass, too.

From Tales Of The Mysterious Traveler #5 (1957)

Manic Monday Double Secret Bonus--New York? Sounds More like Los Angeles...

The Mysterious Traveler tells us all about New York City...

Wait just one darned second!! Rewind, Cambot:

"It is not strange even to see a hobo with his own servant"?!?

Dude, even hobo Namor didn't have his own servant!!

Still, there may be the potential for a new series here...Hobo Manservant!! See Jarvis care for Tony Stark one of the many times when he's in the gutter. See Alfred fetch tea for Bruce Wayne after Bane steals his fortune!! See Kato kick the crap out of some college kids who want to give a tough time to down-on-his-luck Britt Reid!!

Someone get on this idea immediately, please...

From Tales of The Mysterious Traveler #4 (1957)

Manic Moday--Comic Memes That Give snell High Blood Pressure

So, in Tales of The Mysterious Traveler #4 (1957), young Ainsworth has gone stir crazy at his posting in a "desolate weather station" near the North Pole.

Ainsworth cold cocks his admiral and deserts, but is blocked while fleeing by...

Well, he has to turn back, and...


Wait a minute...that's not how mirages work!!

So let's continue to Tales Of The Mysterious Traveler #5, wherein the evil Sultan of a tiny desert republic with no oil gets lost in the desert, and...



THAT'S NOT HOW MIRAGES WORK!!!!!

Stay tuned for more examples of "That's Not How Mirages Work" on "Comics That Give snell High Blood Pressure Theater"...