TBT: This is going to be a mess of a sad post...
Ayla made her journey over The Bridge shortly after midnight. She hadn't eaten in so many days and wouldn't drink water. At 6 pounds 4 ounces August 1st, she weighed 5 lbs 2 ounces last night. She acted confused. She staggered while walking. My regular vet and the emergency clinic vet couldn't find a cause for her not eating or drinking nor why she was beginning to fall over. The meds they provided didn't help.
I had a choice. Let her starve to death or release her from greater pain. I couldn't let this go on... I chose to release her. It was a horrible decision, but after watching Skeeter linger in distress at 16 for months, I couldn't bear to force Ayla to suffer further.
The emergency vet examined her again and said it didn't look like she would survive too many more days. You can't make a cat eat. And for whatever reason she couldn't or wouldn't.
My regular new vet just couldn't fit another appointment into their schedule. I won't forget that, but they are good vets otherwise, just way over-booked.
The emergency clinic vet had done a lot Friday but couldn't find anything specifically "wrong". I think it was just "old age".
The ER vet took her aside to prepare a catheter, then brought her back (because I insisted on being there). I told her what a good friend she had been for 16 years. I told her she was the best Princess ever. I told her that I would "see her on the other side" someday. And that I would miss her so much until we meet again...
She purred with my arms around her one last time and I stared into her eyes saying "goodbye sweet girl"... Then I told the vet tech to release the clamp.
She was so weak from lack of food that she was gone like hitting a light switch. The vet tech said her heart stopped in 5 seconds. And he checked again after 15 seconds and 30 seconds (ay my demand). She was gone... She probably didn't even know anything was happening.
I'm not sure what I will do the rest of today. I should try to sleep. But first I need to set her out so the other Mews maybe understand she is dead, not just "missing". And wrap her up in a plastic bag while I decide exactly where to bury her around Skeeter, LC, and Iza. And I need to build a marking box like these...
I will prepare a tribute to Ayla later today or tomorrow.
But for now, I think I will just go to bed and cry...