The Funny Papers

Kevin Siers, Joe Heller, Bruce MacKinnon, Mike Smith, Ed Hall, Mike Luckovich, Steve Sack, Dave Whamond, Michael de Adder, Steve Breen, Bill Bramhall, Darrin Bell, Jack Ohman, Drew Sheneman, Nick Anderson,

The Funny Papers

Steve Breen, Marc Murphy, Ed Hall, Jack Ohman, Michael de Adder, Gary Varvel, RJ Matson, Darrin Bell, Steve Sack, David Horsey, Mike Luckovich, Bill Bramhall, Matt Wuerker, Drew Sheneman, Clay Bennett

Tuesday Thought #3

The Funny Papers

Jack Ohman, Nick Anderson, Marc Murphy, Walt Handelsman, JD Crowe, David Horsey, Pat Bagley, Bill Day, RJ Matson, Darrin Bell, Michael de Adder, Drew Sheneman, Mike Smith, Kevin Siers, Clay Bennett,

Tuesday Thought #3

 

I Didn't Say It ...

Andrew Cuomo, New York Governor, on Senate Majority Leader Moscow Mitch McConnell’s recent comments opposing so-called “blue state bailouts”:

“What he’s saying is that if you look at the states that have coronavirus problems, they tend to be Democratic states—New York, California, Michigan, Illinois, they are Democrat states. How ugly a thought? I mean, just think of what he’s saying. People died. Fifteen thousand people died in New York, but they were predominantly Democrats, so why should we help them? I mean, for crying out loud, if there was ever a time for you to put aside your pettiness and your partisanship, and this political lens that you see the world through—Democrat and Republican, and we help Republicans but we don’t help Democrats. That’s not who we are. It’s just not who we are as a people. If there was ever a time for humanity and decency, now is the time. And if there was ever a time for you to stop your obsessive political bias, and anger—which is what it’s morphed into, it’s just a political anger—now is the time. And you want to politically divide this nation now, with all that’s going on? How irresponsible and how reckless.”

That’s Bitch McConnell in a nutshell. A partisan hack who doesn’t care if a Democrat dies because that only helps him move his hate-fueled agenda forward.

Mitch McConnell can politely fuck off.

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J. August Richards, actor from Angel and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., coming out as gay:

“One of the things that I find is so fascinating about Oliver his character on Council of Dads who is gay] is that we have never had anybody like him on network television. He’s a black, gay professional married to another man who is also a black, gay professional. This has never happened before on television … with a daughter. If I think about why I even got involved in this industry it was really to combat oppression, to also, I knew how I was affected by the people of color I saw on television or that I didn’t see on television. So this being a married gay man with a family I realized that on television I don’t take anything I do lightly and you have an opportunity to put an image into millions of homes and I wanted that image to be honest and I wanted it to be correct. So honestly, it required me to show up fully in a way that I don’t always when I’m working. I knew that I could not portray this gay man honestly without letting you all know that I was a gay man myself. I’ve never done that with the people that I worked with. … I knew how important it is to other people out there like me, who would need to see that role model.”

Welcome out, J. August, and thanks for being a role model for the Black community as an openly gay man.

Also, please accept our gift from, HOMO HQ, the Official Coming Out Toaster Oven™ and a copy of The Gay Agenda. You’re making a difference on TV and in the lives of not-yet-out men, and women, everywhere.

Welcome out.

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Van Jones, CNN political commentator, on the decision by some states to ease stay-at-home restrictions and open businesses:

"I think it's incredibly reckless. And, you know, signing these orders is signing a death certificate for many, many, many people who do not need to die and who will. I mean, it's just the bottom line. You're talking about states where they haven't even flattened the curve. It's a death sentence for communities of color that are on the frontlines of this thing already and have the least ability to deal with it. [We] need to be rushing masks, rushing tests, rushing respirators and ventilators to communities of color, because that's where the pain is. This is playing the data card. The data shows that, you know, these are the frontline communities in this fight. From the grocery stores to the hospitals people who live in communities of color need help."

Huh. Communities of color are the hardest hit and most vulnerable—as well as the elderly—and the GOP governors want to reopen?

Sounds kinda racist, don’t it?

PS Van Jones is hot. Just sayin’.

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Kelly Loeffler, Georgia’s GOP Senator, and the wealthiest member of Congress, dismissing the accusations of inside trading—she sold millions worth of stock after a private briefing about the impending pandemic—as a “socialist attack.”

“This is a political attack that is designed to distract from the issue at hand and to use this outbreak to play politics. We have addressed this and taken extraordinary measures to make sure we can’t be attacked for our success. This gets at the very heart of why I came to Washington, to defend free enterprise, to defend capitalism, and this is a socialist attack. We have taken extraordinary measures and I am focused solely on working for Georgians. I’ve been doing that seven days a week around the clock, and it’s my honor to be here and serve, and that’s why I stepped out of the private sector.”

After initially dumping shares in companies that plummeted in value, Loeffler and her husband, who chairs the New York Stock Exchange, invested heavily in a medical supply company.

Coincidence? I think not. Now, Loeffler faces a special election in November to retain her seat, and a pro-_____ Super PAC is supporting one of her GOP challengers; there are several Democrats in the race, which could decide which party controls the Senate.

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Steve Schmidt, GOP strategist, on The Last Word with Lawrence O'Donnell, truth-telling about _____'s reelection prospects:

"We have tens of thousands of Americans who will lose lives they didn't have to. We see an economic collapse that didn't have to be. And we see every indication things will continue to get worse because of the ineptitude of the response. And that's the president's legacy heading into the reelection. He is the greatest disaster in the modern history of the country made worse by the ineptitudes, inefficiency, and confidence of the executive response."

Schmidt was not shy it placing the blame for the deaths of thousands of Americans on President Donald Trump. His callous disregard compounds the need to get rid of this unqualified poser.

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Lance Bass, now openly gay, on the time a bandmate asked him about his orientation:

“It was a big day for me because it was the first day someone asked me if I was gay. Chris Kirkpatrick sat me down and said, ‘Hey dude, are you gay?’ No one had ever asked me that. I was super in the closet and way too young to even know or care what was happening. But I remember getting so freaked out on that set because he caught me so off guard. I’m sure at that point people were wondering—so why don’t you have a girlfriend? It was very blunt. It scared me. I said, ‘No, what are you talking about?’ I wasn’t even telling myself. I definitely wasn’t gonna tell Chris.”

I think most of us have had someone ask if we’re gay, before we were ready to come out, proving it needs to be done when you’re ready, and ready to live openly and out loud.

Today, Bass is an LGBTQ advocate and happily married to actor Michael Turchin; the two recently lost a baby eight weeks into a pregnancy. It was their ninth try at conceiving a baby through IVF and they say they will try again.

I hope it works for them.

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