I Ain't One To Gossip But ....

Yes, it’s true … Aunt Becky is going from Fuller House to the Big House.

Bad parents Lori Loughlin and Mossimo Giannulli have agreed to a guilty plea and struck a deal in connection with their involvement in the Varsity Blues college admissions scandal rather than face trial and certain, longer jail time.

Lori will serve two months in prison, pay a $150,000 fine and have two years of supervised release with 100 hours of community service, while Mossimo will serve five months in prison, a $250,000 fine and two years of supervised release with 250 hours of community service.

I know, I wish it was a longer sentence, too, but the best part of all is that for the rest of their lives when you Google Lori or Mossimo or their two spoiled, and probably not-so-bright daughters, you’ll see scandal and scam artists and bribes and guilty pleas and jail time.

So, Full House and Fuller House will no longer be the worst thing Lori Loughlin has done.

photo

Speaking of dumb celebrities …Jason Derulo.

Singer, and apparent asshat, Jason Derulo is on TikTok and in a desperate attempt to keep his views up he posted a video of himself eating a corn on the cob cartoon style with help from a drill, Jason got corn-holed in the piehole with the corn drill and lost some of his teeth because … stupid.

And now, like Lori, when you Google Jason Derulo you’re apt to see “Jason Derulo getting his corn hole drilled.”

Of course, it was all probably a prank, but, again, stupid. Just sayin’.

photo

Some people get Jude law and Hugh Grant confused as actors, and now they’re going to get them confused as two British men who have the most children with the most partners.

Forty-seven-year-old Jude Law  32-year-old wife of one year, Phillipa Coan, are having a baby; her first, his sixth. And this gets Jude an edge in Most Children by Most Different Moms over Hugh.

Jude shares 23-year-old son Rafferty, 19-year-old daughter Iris, and 17-year-old son Rudy with his first wife, Sadie Frost. He also has a 10-year-old daughter named Sophia with his ex-girlfriend Samantha Burke, as well as a 5-year-old daughter named Ada with his ex-girlfriend Catherine Harding.

Six kids, four Baby Mamas. One tired Jude.

photo

Seriously, who the f%k asked for this?

Mindy Kaling will reunite with her A Wrinkle in Time co-star Reese Witherspoon to co-write the screenplay for Legally Blonde 3: Legally a Senior Citizen. Reese will again star as the aging attorney Elle Woods, producing through her Hello Sunshine studio with the franchise’s original producer Marc Platt.

Blonde 1 came out nineteen years ago followed by Blonde 2 seventeen years ago. And for some reason, nearly two decades later someone thinks the idea on Blonde 3 is a good one?

No. Just no.

photo

I guess when you’ve been fired from a high-profile, big money job for being a pervert and your wife dumps you and takes more than half your coins and property for being a pervert, there’s just one thing left to do: whine about it all and get a tattoo.

Sixty-two-year-old Matt Lauer got inked, y’all, and it’s cray. But first, Lauer, who was accused of rape, abusing his power over female employees, having affairs, flashing people, and buying co-workers sex toys as gifts—but vehemently denies he ever raped anyone—has accused Ronan Farrow of being a lousy reporter who’s only after headlines:

“Will anyone hold Ronan Farrow thoroughly accountable? I doubt it. I ask people to consider how they would react if someone they loved were accused of something horrific and basic journalistic standards were ignored because of a desire to sell books. I also urge people to remember that there are two sides to all stories.”

Oh Matt. You should still be sitting because no one has asked you to get up and start talking again. Least of all Ronan Farrow, who responded to Matt’s rant:

“All I’ll say on this is that Matt Lauer is just wrong. Catch and Kill was thoroughly reported and fact-checked, including with Matt Lauer himself.”

See, Matt basically helped Ronan with much of what was written about him and now claims the rest of it is wrong. Sorry, Matt, not buying it. But then, as sexual predators do, Matt pulled a ____, and claimed he “was falsely accused” by Brooke Nevils, the co-worker who accused him of rape. And like Ronan, Brooke was not having it, and she took to Twitter:

“DARVO: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender.”

Matt also wrote that the accusation “was devastating for my family” and was all a lie “used to sell books.” Um, that lie cost you your job and your family, and yet you didn’t try to fight the lie; you took a payout and whimpered away so, again, stay seated.

But anyway, about that tattoo that Matt suddenly showed off; it reads:

“Hatred corrodes the container it’s carried in.”

It’s kinda hard to read because Matt clearly asked for the Drunk Fratboy Font.

photo

I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Last year, Lindsay Lohan was hyping the opening of her Lohan Beach Club in Mykonos with an MTV reality show of the same name.

The show premiered to mediocre ratings and terrible reviews … followed soon by her beach club opening to mediocre ratings and terrible reviews, and now both have been canceled after about a year.

Gird your loins, people, Lohan is out of work and on the loose …again!

photo

Remember last year when Cardi B ALLEGEDLY ordered a beat down on two strip club bartenders because one of them maybe had sex with Cardi’s man, Offset? Okay, I don’t really either, but the two bartenders, Jade and Baddie G claim they were injured by Cardi’s goons, and then Cardi turned herself in and was charged with two misdemeanors.

Until a Grand Jury heard the case and now Cardi B has been indicted with fourteen charges against her, including two counts of felony attempted assault with intent to cause serious physical injury, misdemeanor reckless endangerment, assault, criminal solicitation, conspiracy and harassment.

I wonder what they’ll charge her with for throwing that shoe at Nicki Minaj?

photo

I love history, and I love that Jennifer Lopez has been able to rewrite hers. Oh, not about her being an amazing musical talent, or an awesome actress, or the best dancer ever, cuz no one, save JLo and A-Rod, would believe that shiz.

No, JLo, on the verg of marrying ALLEGED serial philandered A-Rod in her fourth trip down the aisle, is saying it’s really only her second time as a bride because her first two marriages don’t count because, and this is full-on narcissistic, egotistical, batshit crazy JLo shiz, they didn’t happen in a church, neither one lasted more than a year, and she didn’t do it for the right reasons.

She’s practically a virgin, except for those two kids she had in her third first real marriage to Marc Anthony.

Still, it sounds like she’s sure this marriage will take, until it doesn’t and she says it’s because she’s a serial marrying dolt.

photo 1 2 3 4

And, taking a page from the Jennifer Lopez History Is Flexible Playbook is NBC and the Today show.

Today is celebrating its 25th anniversary of the move to their current studio—seriously, this warrants a party—and they have included every single playing on the Today show team … except for pervy Matt Lauer.

Well, it’s not like he was part of the show for 20 of the 25 years they’re celebrating … except it is.

Sheesh, I’m’a rewrite my own history … like I how I used to be JLo and was a host of the Today show with a trained chimp named Matty until I married Marc Anthony and gave birth to A-Rod.

photo

It seemed like only a moment ago, we talked for a brief second about that Cardi B-Nicki Minaj feud and what Nicki would do if Cardi went to jail. Well, as Nicki is apt to do, she’d start a new feud with someone, anyone, else. Like, say, oh I dunno, freakin’ Miley Cyrus?

In a song on her new EP She Is Coming (aka I’m Way Into Sex And Drugs, Y’All!), Miley, um, raps [?] about how she likes Nicki Minaj but listens to Cardi B instead. And Nicki, known for her outlandish clothes and thin skin took to  her radio show Queen Radio to call Miley out:

“You sucked all that d*ck, only to come out looking like a perdue f*cking chicken on stage, and then got mad and went back to country music. Sit yo’ stupid ass down.”

Miley has yet to comment on being called a chicken with no gag reflex, but Cardi B may have lost her shiz when she was getting her mugshot retouched.

Just sayin’.

photo

You hear stories about celebrities having things stolen … their jewels, their cars, their careers, their houses. Wait. What. Yup, back in March someone tried to steal Halle Berry’s house.

Apparently one Ronald Eugene Griffin showed up at Halle’s house last January and tried to mess with one of the door  locks until being chased off by a gardener. Then in March, Griffin returned with a locksmith and claimed to have the deed to the home, and while workers—does it seem like there are more workers and gardeners in Halle’s house than Halle—called the police, Griffin managed to get the locksmith to change one of the locks and then called the police to accuse the workers of trespassing on his property.

Oy, the cojones. Luckily the LAPD spoke to Halle who had no clue about her, um, ‘houseguest.’ And Griffin was kicked to the curb, er, arrested and charged with “a felony count of procuring and offering a false warranty deed and an additional count of petty theft.”

Must not be the nicest house if the charge was petty theft? Just sayin’. I’m also just sayin’, if Halle can’t even keep a house how can she ever hope to keep a man.

Ouch.

photo

It's Snarkurday!

After it was revealed that Matt Lauer was a creeper, and a creep—with a secret-button-under-the-desk to lock his door after women entered—his wife Annette Roque ended their marriage and kicked him out of their Hamptons’ home.

Annette attempted to file for divorce once before, back in 2006, but Matt charmed her gave her $5 million to stick around. But now Anette and Matt are once again in divorce negotiations, but $5 million just won’t do it this time.

Annette wants more … like she wants both of their family homes—a 40-acre farm in Water Mill, NY, and the manse in the Hamptons; she and Matt own a ranch in New Zealand which they are selling and splitting the profits. Annette also wants financial support for herself—not spousal support—but a one-time payout of $20 million, and then she won’t ask for child support for their three children, though Matt will still be responsible for half the education and health costs until each child is 21.

Who knew that marrying Matt Lauer would be like winning the lottery?

I’d have married him for two houses and $20 million.

photo

John Travolta lives in a world where it’s perfectly okay to fondle the crotch of your male massage therapist without permission … ALLEGEDLY … but last week, in Cannes to promote his next big flop, Gotti, Johnny was asked about the #MeToo movement and his answer was so incredibly ignorant and stupid and nonsensical that I thought maybe his toupee was too tight.

During a press event, a moderator spent most of the time gushing about Travolta’s career in movies—not his career in men’s locker rooms … ALLEGEDLY—but finally someone asked about #MeToo and the nearly 100 women protesting at Cannes about the underrepresentation of female filmmakers at the festival. Travolta said he hadn’t really heard much about #MeToo because, again, my guess, tiny tight toupee:

“I honestly don’t know a ton about it, because I try my best to keep people equal— men, women, races. My father was brilliant at it. He had a global viewpoint. I’m a citizen of the globe, and I’m a citizen of groups and people.”

You know you’ve had too much Scientology when …you don’t have a clue what’s going on in the real world but call yourself global.

photo

Jennifer Love Hewitt walked the red carpet of the Fox Upfronts last week—she’s taking over for the departing Connie Britton ion 9-1-1 next season—and then went on Instagram to apologize for something no one said about her.

After the event, Hewitt—who wishes she’s trademarked ‘JLo’ for herself—saw her photos online and was mortified and so she raced to film an Instagram live video to explain:

“We go to the Upfront yesterday and nobody tells me the day is going to be like 12 hours long and the humidity is going to be almost 100 percent in New York City. So, I just have to apologize. Wearing a black suit? Not a good idea. Not wearing enough hairspray and teasing in my hair? Also, a bad idea. I just have to apologize for how wrecked I look in all the pictures that have come out. I was literally melting ... My hair was flat, my makeup was running off my face and I looked like I had completely forgotten I was an actress in this business who is supposed to look [perfect] when you step on the red carpet. That is not what I’m going to look like on the show. I’m going to have makeup on my face. I’m not going to be sweating ... Honestly, I apologize. I should’ve really gotten it together!”

Honey? No one asked about your looks. They were too busy wondering why anyone would hire you for anything.

Apologize for that.

photo

After fathering five or so kids with two or so women, Hugh Grant has actually decided to marry one of his Baby Mama’s.

Hugh got engaged to his longtime girlfriend and mother to some of his kids, Anna Eberstein. Hugh and Anna have three kids: a two-year-old daughter, a five-year-old son, and a third kiddo who was born earlier this year that they aren’t talking about too much.

Hugh also has two kids with his ex, Tinglan Hong. 

Whether that means he’ll be changed enough to alter his outlook on monogamy remains to be seen. Back in 2016, Hugh had a mouthful to say about the subject of long-term relationships to Howard Stern:

“If you ask me the question, ‘Do I think human beings are meant to be in 40-year-long monogamous, faithful relationships?’ No, no. Whoever said they were?”

That’s one way to start a marriage with a woman who gave birth to three of your five children at the same time another woman was giving birth to the other two kids.

photo

Religion has always been the go-to for pop stars seeking to portray themselves as rebels; think Madonna during her entire career. Think Katy Perry trying to evict nuns from their home because she wanted it.

Now think Beyoncé who just snatched up a church in New Orleans for $850,000. To be fair, the 100-year-old, church has been out of commission since a lot of the members died, but still … Beyoncé … church?

Why? Oh, she thinks she’s some kind of a god … of auto-tune and weaves and oscillating fans. Or maybe she’s found another way to whore herself out for coins. See, recently, about 900 of her most devoted zombies began attending a church service in San Francisco called “Beyoncé Mass.”

And now Beyoncé bought a church in Nawlin’s? How long before she starts her own mass, and sells tickets to his and turns the alter into a concession stand?

If it ain’t making her money, Beyoncé ain’t doin’ it.

photo

Last weekend Janet Jackson won the Icon award at the Billboard Music Awards, and many members of the family were there to see her—after probably cashing a check from Miss Jackson.

Prince Michael was there; Mama Katherine, too. Even the non-singing one—except for that one unfortunate tune in the 80s—Rebbie Jackson was there. Not there; Paris Jackson. Was it because no one likes Paris?

Not according to her; the day after the show, Paris posted an Instagram story complaining that nobody had bothered to tell her about Aunt Janet’s big night:

“No one from my mgmt reached out to me about attending billboards or about the award, and no one from my family did either. I had absolutely no idea until y’all spammed with hatred.”

Hey Paris? The Jackson Five weren’t there … LaToya? Nope. Blanket? Unless he was laying under a seat he wasn’t there either, so it wasn’t just you … it’s most of your messy family who didn’t get the ticket, or a check.

photo

It's Snarkurday!

Remember when songwriters Sean Hall and Nathan Butler sued Taylor Swift back in September claiming that her off-key ramblings of “players gonna play” and “haters gonna hate” on 2014s Shake It Off might have been a rip-off of their song from 2001 called Playas Gon’ Play?

They wanted 20% of Shake It Off’s profits, or roughly $30 million dollars, but the case was thrown out because, well, no one actually wrote “playas gon’ play” because people have been saying it long before anyone heard of Swifty or Hall or Butler.

So, that should have been the end of things, right? Nope, because Swifty countersued for the $75,000 she paid in legal fees to defend herself. And that’s when Judge Michael Fitzgerald gave Taytay a lesson in how the law works before kicking her case to the curb; Fitzgerald explained that although the suit may appear like a shakedown, it’s not entirely unbelievable to say that Taylor Swift stole a couple of lines from their song.

Fitzgerald dismissed Swifty’s claim and told her to go home and steal write another song about it.

photo

When Tristan Thompson got caught cheating on his Baby Mama Khloé Kardastrophe, the other woman was ALLEGEDLY an Instagram model … which is ALLEGEDLY where Tristan met his many, many, hookups.

At first Tristan tried to appease Khloé by claiming the women were just “stupid groupies” … cuz that somehow makes it all right, but now maybe she’s not so forgiving since it’s been revealed that he went after all these women on social media, the very bread-and-butter of a Kardastrophe’s life.

Karma, baby. Live your life on Instagram, find your life ruined on Instagram.

photo

In Ick news … “Smallville” actress Allison Mack, who was arrested last week for her role in a sex cult, ALLEGEDLY tried to lure Kelly Clarkson and Emma Watson into her “movement.”

Mack sent tweets to Watson about an “amazing women’s movement” she thought they might be interested in:

“I’m a fellow actress like yourself & involved in an amazing women’s movement I think you’d dig. I’d love to chat if you’re open.”

She followed that with:

“I participate in a unique human development & women’s movement I’d love to tell you about.”

Mack also sent a vague tweet to Clarkson about having a “chat.”

“I heard through the grapevine that you’re a fan of ‘Smallville.’ I’m a fan of yours as well! I’d love to chat sometime.”

Mack has pleaded not guilty to charges of sex trafficking and forced labor after she ALLEGEDLY lured female members of the self-empowerment group Nxivm into a secret society that forced women into sex slavery.

Seriously.

photo

In the ongoing feud between herself and Kim Cattrall, Sarah Jessica Parker—and let’s face it, SJP is the only one talking and still talking—claims she was nice to everyone on set. As for her alleged battles with Kim, she says she has never engaged in that sort of thing:

“I’d just like to remind everybody that there is no catfight. I have never uttered an unkind, unsupportive, unfriendly word, so I would love to redefine it … I’ve always held Kim’s work in high regard and always appreciative of her contributions. If she chooses not to do the third movie, there’s not a lot I can do to change her mind and we must respect it. That’s the only thing I’ve ever said about it, you know?

But, no, there is no catfight, there never has been a catfight. I’ve never fought with someone publicly in my life, nor would I. And I spent time with all of the women on the set … We are enormously proud of what we got to do and I don’t want someone sharing thoughts publicly, which is Kim’s right to do and that is what it is, but we spent 10, 12 years of our life doing something that I really loved and I feel privileged to be part of and I don’t want this to eclipse it or change its experience for that audience that was so good to us for so long.”

Gosh, she never did or said a mean word or thing to anyone anywhere ever … because she has minions like Andy Cohen do it for her. Give it another week and SJP will be back talking about the non-catfight-catfight again, while Kim Cattrall just moves on.

photo

God, Gwyneth Paltrow does not know when to shut her pie-hold, albeit a possibly gluten-free piehole.

After dating everyone, everyone, from Brad Pitt to Ben Affleck to Chris Martin—whom she married—Paltrow now claims that her new husband, Brad Falchuk, is her first “adult” relationship.

Gwyneth is 45 but clearly thinks she has neither dated, nor married, an adult male, ever. I don’t feel bad for Brad or ben, because they’re provably positively Glee-ful to have avoided a Paltrow marriage, but poor Chris Martin, the father of Goops children, Pear and Elijah, has now learned that he is not an adult … after learning, also, that Paltrow thinks of him as a brother.

This woman is too much, and too full of herself.

photo

So, a few years ago, Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert’s marriage imploded. Was it his boozing or her cheating, or maybe both? But they both moved on rather quickly, with Lambert hooking up with a backup singer and Shelton hooking up with a headline singer, Gwen Stefani.

Lambert’s post-marital relationship crashed and burned, but Blake and Gwen are ALLEGEDLY still going strong. But he clearly still holds a grudge because Miranda and her last ex-boyfriend Anderson East split a couple of months ago, but now we learned that Miranda was also sleeping with Evan Felker, the married frontman of Turnpike Troubadours at that same time.

So, maybe it was less Blake’s boozing and more Miranda’s sleeping around? At any rate, the news to Miranda’s married boyfriend did not go unnoticed by Shelton, who Tweeted:

“Been taking the high road for a long time.. I almost gave up. But I can finally see something on the horizon up there!! Wait!! Could it be?! Yep!! It’s karma!!”

But is he really taking the high road, because if he’d moved on, and clearly, they both have, would he care?

Just sayin’.

photo

Well, all those jobs that Lindsay Lohan never got have finally hurt the family. Lindsay mother, Dina “Can I Order Chardonnay By The Bucket” Lohan is losing her home to foreclosure because her daughter dividend paycheck daughter doesn’t really work and can’t foot the bills on Chez Lohan any more.

In 2013 it was reported that Dina was $1 million in debt and took out a $1.3 million loan on her home. But Dina has a hard time paying back loans and so the bank came a’knocking, as banks are apt to do when you don’t pay them back.

But Lindsay swooped in with 40K—she is a high-class call girl, you know—to help, but it wasn’t enough and so JP Morgan Chase filed a lawsuit to foreclose on her house and a judge has ordered the home to be sold off.

I guess Dina could always go live under the bars her daughter used to sleep under.

photo

Apparently, what’s been going on behind the scenes of Fox’s Lethal Weapon TV show is much better than what makes it on camera, even if what’s going on could sink the show.

Lethal Weapon is in its second season and a third season seemed to be expected but one of the show’s leads, Clayne Crawford—I have no idea who he is—has been accused of terrorizing the cast and crew on set. Sources say Crawford is emotionally abusive and created a hostile working environment and it wasn’t until the higherups had a chat with Crawford and mentioned the possibility of a third season with a different actor, that he squeezed out an apology to the crew and an unnamed actor … possibly his costar Damon Wayans.

So, there you have a show with two stars who don’t get along, and one who feels himself the budget Christian Bale.

And Fox is thinking about keeping this shiz going?

photo

Remember last week, at the GLAAD Awards, when Halle Berry announced this mess … “Behind every Black Panther there’s a Black Catwoman!” … and then suggested that a reboot get another chance?

Well, this past week, when she was honored at the 2018 Matrix Awards Halle talked about her career and her intuition, and as she rambled on and on and on, she realized the audience had slipped into a coma and so then she talked about … Catwoman:

“Everybody around me said, ‘Girl don’t do it, it’s gonna be the death of you, it’s gonna end your career.’ Well guess what I did? I followed my intuition and I did a movie called Catwoman…and it bombed! Miserably. But I assumed it. Because you know what? While it ‘failed’ to most people, it wasn’t a failure for me. Because guess what? I met so many interesting people that I wouldn’t have met otherwise, I got to learn two forms of martial arts and I got to learn what not to do, and learning what not to do is as important as learning what to do. And I got that gift, and I got a shitload of money that changed my life.”

And there you have it: a shitload of money. And that’s why she wants to do it again, even though she doesn’t seem to realize that since the first one tanked, epically, no one will give her even a turdload of coins.

Sit down, Halle, Catwoman is over ... for you.

photo

Well, looks who’s come crawling out of the Sexual Predator Slime: Matt Lauer.

He’s reared his bald head and groping hands and leering eyes to tell us all about allegations that got him canned from the Today by way of a piece by The Washington Post:

“I have made no public comments on the many false stories from anonymous or biased sources that have been reported about me over these past several months … I remained silent in an attempt to protect my family from further embarrassment and to restore a small degree of the privacy they have lost. But defending my family now requires me to speak up. I fully acknowledge that I acted inappropriately as a husband, father and principal at NBC. However I want to make it perfectly clear that any allegations or reports of coercive, aggressive or abusive actions on my part, at any time, are absolutely false.”

There you have it; he admits to being a bad boy but says he did nothing wrong and don’t believe anyone who says otherwise.

Okurrrrrrrrr.

photo

I’ll give it to Jennifer Lopez, she doesn’t do subtle … at this week’s Billboard Latin Music Awards, JLo performed her new song, El Anillo—which means The Ring—the third single from her new Spanish album Por la Primera Vez .

The lyrics translate to:

“I have never felt anything this grand

And your wild side drives me crazy

You’ve given me so much that I’ve been thinking

I already have it all, but

When will I get the ring?”

Wow, someone is desperate for Alex Rodriguez to become the fourth Mr. Jennifer Lopez … because you can’t get to 5, 6, 7 or 8 without getting through #4.

photo

It's Snarkurday!

After her arrest last weekend for being a drunk trying to have sex in someone else’s hotel room, and shrieking at the police, “I will fucking kill you all,” Luann de Lesseps made a New Year’s resolution: to go to rehab:

“After the events of last Saturday night in Palm Beach, I am truly embarrassed. I have decided to seek professional guidance and will be voluntarily checking into an alcohol treatment center. I intend to turn this unfortunate incident into a positive life changing event. Once again, I sincerely apologize for my actions. I have the greatest respect for police officers and the job they do.  My actions alleged in the police report do not reflect my core values and my law-abiding character. I am so grateful for the love and support that I am receiving from my family, friends and loyal supporters.”

Funny, she didn’t think to seek rehab after spending an entire episode of RHoNY drinking so much she fell off a patio ... twice. 

And she postponed her rehab so she could perform her nightclub act, so clearly, it’s not a priority.

photo

Rumer Willis, what were you thinking?

She’s having a tattoo removed; a tattoo removed, a tattoo of her and Dancing With the Stars’ Val Chmerkovskiy embracing that she had inked on her arm after they won the show.

Now, the odd thing is, there was never a romance between the pair, but Rumer inked herself anyway, until she learned that Chmerkovskiy had started dating fellow DWTS pro Jenna Johnson.

She wasn’t as upset, though, when Chmerkovskiy dated Amber Rose for a half minute, but this relationship with Johnson made her rethink the ink and go under the laser.

Perhaps, next time, she should think before inkcuz that's a big ass tat.

photo

Oh, Mariah Carey did try and redeem herself after last year’s d-s-sastrous New Year’s Eve performance when she basically tottered around the stage on her high heels like a lost Times Square hooker.

So, this year she performed again, and while she did remember the words to her own songs, she sounded a bit like veteran character actor Broderick Crawford while she warbled through Hero.

But, the best part was when she went in search of a cup of hot tea to sip on and when she couldn’t find it, she declared that to be a real disaster:

“Happy New Year, I just want to take a sip of tea, if they let me. They told me there would be tea…Oh! It’s a disaster. Okay, well, we’ll just have to rough it. I’m going to be like everybody else, with no hot tea.” 

Says the woman wrapped in a fur court to the crowd who waited outside in the frigid temperatures for hours to hear her croak a tune.

photo

Speaking of divas, Taylor Swift’s latest album, Reputation, returned to the #1 spot on Billboard charts over Christmas, which probably made her squee with delight, but …

As for the Reputation Tour, fans are pissed off by the jacked-up prices to watch TayTay lip-sync-and-dance.

Ticketmaster confirms that none of the dates has sold out yet, because, while her last tour saw ticket prices of $150 this time Swifty wants her fans to cough up $500 to hear her sing.

Which is about $499.99 too much.

photo 1, 2

Hoda Kotb made history by landing sexual predator Matt Lauer’s old Today Show gig, but she isn’t making nearly as many coins as the perv.

Kotb will make about $18 million less per year than Lauer, which I guess means if you sexually harass women you get a huge check, but if you are a woman, well, here’s some scraps.

Still, Kotb’s $7 million a year check is about a third of what NBC is paying Megyn Kelly, who is about the worst thing to hit the network since Matt Lauer installed that self-locking door in his office.

photo

In other Swifty news, maybe it looks like one of Taylor’s Girl Squad or Posse or Gang or whatever it is they call themselves, has been deprogrammed and joined the rest of us in the real world … or, worse for Swift, in Katy Perry’s world.

Former Swift BFF Karlie Kloss posted a photo to Instagram that may … or may not … have used lyrics from that Swifty’s archrival Katy Perry’s classic Swish Swish.

If you don’t remember … and who doesn’t … Swish Swish was Katy’s clapback at Swifty’s Bad Blood, a ditty about mean girls who steal backup dancers from blow-up kewpie dolls.

And that’s the word Karlie used in her Instagram post, and that clearly signaled the end of Karlie and TayTay 4 Evah.

Especially when Swifty’s army of prepubescent teen girls and boys went after Karlie for the double swish.

Seriously.

photo

We learned that Hoda Kotb will be doing Matt Lauer’s old job, but for many, many, many millions of dollars less, but there’s more about the creeper Lauer.

Apparently, the out of work pervert has been firing off notes to producers of The Today Show offering up his unsolicited feedback on the latest episodes … like the email he recently sent a producer saying that he felt they had used the wrong music to kick off a segment.

I know; he’s run out of town for sexual harassing and abusing women, his wife has left him, and taken the kids, but he sits alone in his Hamptons manse stroking his Little Matt and watching the Today show looking for things that bother him.

Howsabout looking in a mirror, asshat?

photo