The Lost Class

Last week former NRA president David Keene accepted an invitation to address the 2021 graduating class of James Madison Academy.

He arrived at the school and was scheduled for a rehearsal of sorts at the socially distanced ceremony, and took the stage and gave his speech in front of 3,044 empty chairs.

Trouble is, there is no such school as the James Madison Academy, so there was no graduation, What Keene did was speak to the 3,044 AKA “The Lost Class,” which represented all those students who should-have-been the 2021 high school graduates but were killed by gun violence before they finished school.

The stunt was devised by Change the Ref, an organization deeply involved in the gun control movement. Founded by Manuel and Patricia Oliver, whose son Joaquin was tragically killed in the 2018 Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School shooting in Parkland, Florida.

Footage from Keene’s speech was released last week, edited into a video advocating for raising awareness against gun rights advocacy and the threat it poses to middle and high school students. Keene was unaware that he was set up to make a fake speech which caused a Change the Ref spokesperson to say:

“Ironically, had the men conducted a proper background check on the school, they would have seen that the school is fake.”

Snap. Background checks are good.

Mediaite

Betsy DeVos' Gun Violence Commission Ignored Guns, While Punishing Minority Students

Shortly after seventeen people were murdered at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, the _____ administration, and their lack of interest, concern, care, empathy with those who had died, came under fire for doing nothing to protect students.

But then some of those surviving students became activists, outspoken, loud, who condemned the White House for their inaction, and suddenly _____ thought he might need to do something.

You know, cuz ignoring dead students isn’t a good look on anyone, even the Fat Bastard. So, ____commanded Betsy DeVos, his ill-equipped, laughably unqualified, woefully inept Secretary of Education  to create a commission to study the epidemic of gun violence in schools and come up with recommendations to make schools safer.

Kinda like allowing the wolves to run the hen house. Except, slower, and lazier. See, it took Betsy a while to set up her commission—she was probably hoping the activist students would get tired—but when she finally did get around to appointing members to her team, she named four _____ Cabinets Secretaries— herself, the Attorney General, HHS Secretary Alex Azar, and Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen—no Democrats, no students and not one single expert on gun violence.

Then, while testifying before Congress, DeVos admitted that her commission on gun violence in schools would not focus … not focus … on the role of guns in school shootings. Yes, they would study gun violence without studying the role of guns. But then it got worse.

While her commission worked … and I jest in saying that … Betsy DeVos announced a plan to allow schools to use federal funds to buy guns because more guns is always the answer, especially when you, your boss and his entire administration is beholden to the once-deep pockets of the NRA.

And then it got worse … more worse … even worse. This week _____ and DeVos are using that school safety commission to rescind or roll back Obama-era guidelines that were designed to protect Black and other minority students from racially-motivated punishments, while suggesting they are responsible for a rise in school violence.

Yes, this is what DeVos concluded from her year-long study of gun violence in schools … that Obama-era guidelines needed to go; not guns, but a set of criteria to make sure minority students were not unfairly disciplined. Not a word about guns, or the murder of students in schools.

Oh, and that whole subject about how black and minority students are responsible for gun violence in school? Complete and utter bull shiz; the Parkland shooter is white, as are most school shooters, but, hey, let’s blame it on the black and brown kids so we can satisfy our base. But facts are facts, Betsy, and these are facts:

Black and brown students are three times more likely to be punished.

Black and brown girls are suspended six times more than white girls.

Black and brown boys are suspended three times more than white boys.

This is just another way to attack those students who are considered ‘other,’ or, you know, not white.

Remember that Betsy DeVos' first act on the job was to rescind Obama-era guidance protecting the civil rights of transgender students. She then rescinded guidance protecting students with disabilities. DeVos has worked to expand protections for accused rapists—like her boss—and others accused of sexual misconduct, including assault and harassment.

This has nothing to do with guns, nothing to do with students being murdered in schools, but everything to do with undoing the work of our first black, and best, presidents, and targeting any and all minority students as the problem.

This is the racist agenda of _____ and Betsy DeVos, plain and simple. And when we oust the Fat Bastard from office, it’s gonna take a lot of work putting this country back together again.

NCRM

Tuesday Thought #3

When Wingnuts Attack ... Students Fight Back

Of course I stand with the students from Marjorie Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida; I’ve stood with everyone who has come out in favor of responsible, sensible, common sense gun control, no matter who they are or their age.

Sadly, many on the right, those _____ supporters and lackeys, those rightwingnut news hacks, those NRA lapdogs, feel the same; but that’s okay. It’s okay to have a difference of opinion, but let’s talk. Let’s not name call and badmouth and attack these students; they aren’t Hitler Youth as one Fox News nut said; Emma Gonzalez if not a skinhead lesbian as a GOP politician claimed.

But we’ll talk today about Laure Ingraham, a Fox News pundit, and “Good” Christian, who has an issue with the Parkland students, most notably David Hogg, who has been eloquently vocal in his calls for gun control.

Ingraham took to her own show last week, Fox News’ Ingraham Angle to openly mock 17-year-old David Hogg for getting rejected by four colleges:

Yes, a grown woman who shares a different view on a topic than does Hogg, didn’t discuss their differences, but chose instead to make fun of Hogg for being rejected by four University of California schools. Of note, is that the news came out about his four rejections from David Hogg, himself, but still Ingraham slipped into the much to attack the young man.

In the six weeks since the shooting, Hogg has emerged as a leading student voice for gun control. But, sadly, in _____’s America, when you disagree with the Fat Bastard and his rightwingnut evangelical Christian hypocrite base, you spark a smear campaign that started out small, but has gathered steam thanks to fools like Ingraham who don’t understand how to have an intelligent discussion with people of opposing viewpoints.

And this isn’t the first time Ingraham has mocked David Hogg; the day before he spoke at the March For Our Lives rally, Ingraham mocked him for using profanity in a video interview in which he called politicians who refuse to consider gun control “sick fuckers.”

Um, is that wrong, because that’s exactly how I feel when politicians sit by and watch Americans slaughtered time after time and then just send out a meaningless ‘Thoughts and Prayer’ Tweet.

Too bad Laura Ingraham didn’t understand that the pendulum just might be swinging back toward the middle, if not the left, because David Hogg, after her series of attacks, took to Twitter himself and call for a boycott of her show’s sponsors:

Soon after, at least four of Ingraham's advertisers—Wayfair, Expedia, TripAdvisor and pet food brand Nutrish—announced that they were pulling their commercials from her program.

And then guess what? Laura Ingraham decided then, when money was being taken from her show, and her pocket, that maybe she should apologize:

And Isn’t it lovely that she thought it necessary to mention Holy Week, as though a real Christian would attack a student; Ingraham is one of those fake Christians who trots out her faith whenever she tries to make a point because if she really lived life as a Christian the last thing she’d want to do is attack a young man who watched seventeen of his fellow classmates shot to death.

And David Hogg wasn’t having the apology, either; he noted that it wasn’t enough and only came about when her advertisers began to flee:

"She's only apologizing after a third of her advertisers pulled out. I think it's great that corporate America is standing with me and the rest of my friends, because when you come against any one of us, whether it be me or anybody else, you're coming against all of us. And I think it's important that we stand together as both corporate and civic America to take action against these people and show them that they cannot push us around, especially when all we're trying to do here is save lives."

Look, we can all disagree, though how we can disagree about the need to do something to stop the flow of blood from mass shootings, is beyond me, but, yeah, we can disagree; but let’s talk; let’s communicate; let’s discuss.

Let’s not stoop to the level of a Laura Ingraham and attack high school students because, well, that’s just plain stupid.

PS Laura Ingraham suddenly decided to take a week off, possibly in the hope that her show will stop hemorrhaging cash; too bad she doesn’t care as much about Americans hemorrhaging blood in schools and malls and churches and concerts and …and …and …

March

I’m with her.

Marjory Stoneman Douglas student survivor Emma González spoke at the March for Our Lives protest in Washington, D.C. (and while every speech was moving, thoughtful, thought provoking and from the heart, Emma delivered. It was powerful speech made even more powerful when she stopped speaking.

After more than a minute of silence from the podium, with Emma standing still and quiet, someone came on stage, touched her shoulder, and seemed to ask if she was all right.

Emma González didn't move or speak. As she stayed silent, people in the crowd began chanting:

"Never again! Never again!"

Emma stood silent, in tears, and soon the crowd fell quiet. Still, nothing, but a tear running down her face. Finally, someone in the crowd, perhaps thinking Emma couldn’t go on shouted:

"We love you Emma!" 

Emma said nothing … for four solid minutes; then a timer went off., and Emma reached in her pocket, turned it off, and said:

"Since the time that I came out here, it has been six minutes and 20 seconds. The shooter has ceased shooting and will soon abandon his rifle, blend in with the students and walk free for an hour before arrest. Fight for your lives before it's someone else's job."

And then Emma González walked off the stage, silently becoming one of the most powerful speakers ever.

The March for our Lives event in Columbia, organized by Building Better Communities, an organization that works with law enforcement to create better community relations, as well as local chapters of Moms Demand Action, Faith Coalition On Gun Violence and Moms Against Gun Violence, brought several thousand people to the streets of the capitol city.

The march, led by high school students walked up toward the South Carolina State House, growing larger and louder; signs waved; people chanted; some cried. Many held signs:

 “Guns are the death of U.S.”

“Protect kids not guns.”

“No more silence. End Gun violence.”

And a play on ____’s campaign slogan:

“Make America safe again.”

Hundreds of orange flowers were laid out on the State House steps, spelling out Never Again, the motto of the growing gun control movement and Columbia Mayor Stephen Benjamin, praised the students, but chastised those older folks:

“Old folks need to act. This is a moment in the history of our nation that if we stand behind our young people and follow them, we can fundamentally change our nation. Listen to what the youth are saying about gun control measures."

Sarah Hinnant was one of those young people leading the marchers; she is 18 and is quite clear about what she wants:

Universal background checks.

An assault weapons ban.

No more high-capacity magazines.

The closing of loopholes that allow people to buy guns without the proper protocol.

That loophole is known as the “Charleston loophole” because it allowed a racist white supremacist lunatic—I won’t say his name—to murder nine black parishioners in Charleston, by outlasting a waiting period for a background check to come back.

Sadly, even after Charleston, South Carolina allows the purchase of assault rifles and high-capacity magazines and does not require background checks for private sales, such as at gun shows.

This was a loophole that state Representative James Smith, a Democrat and candidate for governor, called for state and national lawmakers to close.:

“It’s been the youth of America that have been a catalyst for positive change. Like the Freedom Riders of the ’60s demanding civil rights and racial equality, it’s you here today who can bring about the positive change for safer schools, a stronger community and let us leave this place for the next generation a better place than we found it.”

Better than we found it; safer than before.

But not all politicians feel that way, and mots of those are Republicans and most of those are sucking at the teat of the NRA.

Marco Rubio.

On the day of the March, Rubio released a statement to tell those students that he does not support their cause:

“I commend those who today are peacefully exercising their First Amendment rights to march in favor of a gun ban. While I do not agree with all of the solutions they propose, I respect their views and recognize that many Americans support certain gun bans. However, many other Americans do not support a gun ban. They too want to prevent mass shootings, but view banning guns as an infringement on the Second Amendment rights of law abiding citizens that ultimately will not prevent these tragedies.

“While protests are a legitimate way of making a point, in our system of government, making a change requires finding common ground with those who hold opposing views. Common ground is how we were able to achieve the STOP School Violence Act, improvements to our background check system, propelling CDC studies on gun violence and now, a ban on bump stocks. And finding common ground is what it will take to pass our red flag law so we can take guns away from dangerous people.”

Marco Rubio receives more campaign donations form the NRA—more than $3 million—than any other politician, left or right. Remember that; he has a vested interest in keeping gun control legislation from passing.

Marjorie Stoneman Douglas students have repeatedly attacked Marco Rubio for his ties to the NRA and at the March this past weekend they continued;  at the D.C. rally, Parkland students wore orange price tags listed at $1.05, which is what they say they were worth to Marco Rubio; the $1.05 price tag represents the number of students in Florida divided by the amount of money the NRA has donated to Rubio’s campaign.

I guess high school students aren't even worth a buck to Marco Rubio.

And, lastly, where was _____ during the march? Playing golf, of course; having another vacation weekend and saying nothing about the march. Of course, being in the pocket of the NRA, what could he say? This:

“Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims of the horrible attack in France yesterday, and we grieve the nation’s loss. We also condemn the violent actions of the attacker and anyone who would provide him support. We are with you @EmmanuelMacron!”

Yes, he stood in support of victims of terrorism in France, but not with the victims and survivors of gun violence, and home-grown terrorism right in his own backyard.

He said nothing about the more than one million Americans in over 800 cities in all 50 states protesting gun violence and demanding stronger gun control laws.

I’m with Emma … and the students of Parkland … and Sarah Hinnant and James Smith and the thousands of people who took to the streets of Columbia and around the country to simply say …

#Enough

Bobservations

This past Monday evening, as I was picking Carlos up from work, I said:

“I’m gonna take tomorrow off and finish priming the bedroom.”

I have some personal days and thought I’d use one. Carlos said fine, mainly because we are tired of sleeping in a queen-sized bed with three cats. That next day, I drove him to work, went home and began painting. Around noon, the phone rings and it’s Carlos:

“I called work and they said you didn’t come in.”

I replied:

“I told you I was taking the day off to paint.”

“But you said ‘tomorrow,’ so I thought you meant Wednesday.”

“Honeybunch? When a person says ‘tomorrow’ on Monday, they mean Tuesday, because on Monday Wednesday is the day after tomorrow.”

Lord, that man.

Sidenote: when Carlos called me at work that Tuesday, my boss thought I hadn’t told Carlos I was taking the day off, and didn’t want to get me into any trouble, or insert himself into what he thought might be a fight, and so he told Carlos I was ‘indisposed.

After Ben Carson tried to buy a dining table for $31,000, we found out that the Interior Department spent nearly $139,000 on a work order labeled as “Secretary’s Door.” The project was carried out by a Maryland company called Conquest Solutions … the only company to bid on the job … that specializes in building automation systems, like costly doors.

Now comes the part that’s hard to believe, I mean, if you believe a door can cost $139,000; a spokes-idiot for Interior Department Secretary Ryan Zinke claims the cost of the doors was news to her, and that the work was requested by career staffers as part of a building modernization effort; she claimed that historic preservation requirements and new locks raised the cost.

Uh huh; so, you do know the cost, or you don’t know the cost? And if this is part of an historic restoration, how does an automatic door fit into that.

Let’s have Democratic Congressman Adam Schiff have the last word on the matter:

"What a waste. Just think how many dining sets you could have bought or private jets you could have chartered with that money."

The grifters are running the government, people. Get out; resist; vote.

After allegedly threatening to take his life last month over allegations that he raped two underage boys, Ronnie Gorton, a married father and pastor of The Awakening Church in Tennessee, was indicted on 47 counts of illegal relations with three underage boys including five counts of aggravated sexual battery, 17 counts of sexual battery by an authority figure, two counts of continuous sexual abuse of a child, 16 counts of statutory rape by an authority figure, two counts of exploitation of a minor by electronic means, two counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor, two counts of purchasing alcohol for a child, and one count of rape.

Yup, the pastor f**ks children.  Just sayin’.

In Bye Felicia News … Victoria Miller and her three daughters, the Christian owners of W.W. Bridal Boutique in Pennsylvania have decided to close their business due to fears that impending ordinance would require their public business serve all the public and stop denying service to lesbian couples:

 “The members of our town council have made it known they will pass an ordinance soon. We have chosen to close rather than be forced to go against our faith.”

Um, Victoria, you can still practice your Bigotry and Hate Faith, you just can’t use it to deny services to people.M’kay?

Look! A grifter! It looks like _____ isn’t the only _____ with potential conflicts of interest in the White House.

Ivanka “Complicit” _____, an ALLEGED senior White House adviser will pull in more than $1 million a year from the family business that has continued to develop luxury resorts across the globe during the ______ sham presidency.

And, some of those _____-branded developments are hiring state-owned companies for construction, receiving gifts from foreign governments in the form of public land or eased regulations and accepting payments from customers who are foreign officials.

Yes, she’s a thief and lair and grifter and con artist, just like her husband and her daddy.

Meanwhile, Back at Ben Carson’s $31, 000 dining table for his office.

When the story broke, Carson and his staff claimed they had no knowledge of the cost of the table, but since they all work for _____, we now know that was a lie.

Newly released emails show Carson and his wife selected the furniture themselves. The email, with the subject line “Secretary’s dining room set needed,” sent to Carson’s assistant refers to “printouts of the furniture the Secretary and Mrs. Carson picked out.”

The Secretary picked out.

Yup, it’s a swampy slime-fest in DC, thanks to _____ and his ilk.

Dennis Alexander is a teacher and a reserve police officer.

Dennis Alexander was teaching a course about gun safety for his Administration of Justice class.

Dennis Alexander accidentally fired that gun inside the classroom injuring three students.

But, by all means, arm teachers. What could possibly go wrong?

The NRA proved once again what a disgusting group of terrorists they are, and in doing so are practically guaranteeing that millions of teenagers, who will be old enough to vote for the first time in November, will be Democrats.

In an effort to counter calls for new gun control legislation on Wednesday, the same day that thousands of students across the country, and the world, walked out of schools to protest gun violence, the NRA tweeted a picture that image depicting an AR-15 style rifle, the same gun used in the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School shooting, with the caption, “I’ll control my own guns, thank you.”

Vile. Mocking students who watched as classmates were slaughtered by the very same kind of weapon they want everyone to own.

I hope these students keep marching and talking and protesting and voting. I’ll be doing the same right alongside them.

South Carolina’s GOP Governor, Henry McMaster, who just yesterday called the student walkout “disgraceful”, proved how disgusting a man he is by issuing an executive order Tuesday that allows foster care providers to discriminate based on religion without losing their license.

For decades, the Greenville-based Miracle Hill Ministries has only allowed foster children to be placed with parents who share the organization’s Christian beliefs. That practice came under fire when a new regulation took effect thanks to My President, Barack Obama, that prevented publicly licensed and funded foster care agencies from servicing specific religions.

But McMaster is all about discrimination. Luckily, he’s up for reelection and I’m hoping the people of South Carolina put an end to his career.

Palate Cleanser… this week on Homeland, Carrie enlisted a team to help her get information out of a suspect, and, well, if I was ever going to get roughed up for information, these three sides of beef could dot …just saying.

Clockwise, from the top, Hot Ginger William Popp, Beefcake Clé Bennett and snarky James D'Arcy.

Interrogate me, boys!

The Funny Papers

Bill Day, Drew Sheneman, Steve Benson, Kevin Kallaugher, RJ Matson, Jim Morin, Steve Sack, Kevin Siers, Clay Bennett, David Fitzsimmons

The Funny Papers

Bill Day, Joe Heller, Mike Luckovich, Nick Anderson, Chris Britt, Ed Wexler, Jim Morin, David Horsey, RJ Matson, Darrin Bell