Ain't That America XXVII

We’re doing things a bit backwards today and starting with good news, resistance news, and news of a shift in the GOP, before moving on to the Party of Party Over Country, swearing their allegiance to a rapist, racist, predator, adulterer, con artist and war criminal, so let’s go …

In the wake of the Florida’s mandated removal of the Key West’s Pride crosswalks homeowners across the island have made their yards a little brighter by painting seven of their fence posts in rainbow colors.

But alas, the rainbows are also unpermitted in the historic district as Susan Kent learned the hard way when a neighbor, Penny Walker, a self-proclaimed “Christian Republican,” filed a complaint. Kent received a letter from the city’s Historic Architectural Review Commission alerting her that the city had received a complaint from Walker, who took to X to boast about her hate.

Kent painted over her rainbow to come into compliance but also said:

“Don’t worry, I have something else planned.”

This is Resistance ay work.

And in the same vein, St. Petersburg, Florida said it is honoring the Pride street murals removed earlier this by installing eleven “Pride-inspired bike racks” along Central Avenue and 25th Street. The city says the bike racks are “a vibrant way to honor the Pride street murals that were removed earlier this year due to state requirements.”

Again we see the Resistance at work ... in Florida where the city of Miami has elected its first Democrat Mayor in over 30 years!

Last week House of Representatives voted to overturn Cankles’ executive order ending collective bargaining rights for two-thirds of the federal workforce. It marks the first time in Cankles second term that the House secured enough votes to smack his bulbous orange melon.

The measure faces an uphill battle as it heads to the GOP-controlled Senate but the House did its job for a change.

Colorado Governor Jared Polis has told Cankles he cannot pardon Tina Peters:

“Tina Peters was convicted by a jury of her peers, prosecuted by a Republican District Attorney, and found guilty of violating Colorado state laws, including criminal impersonation. No President has jurisdiction over state law nor the power to pardon a person for state convictions. This is a matter for the courts to decide, and we will abide by court orders.”

Snap.

Shortly after that Cankles “symbolically” pardoned Peters which means absolutely nothing.

Indiana Republican state senators voted against a redrawn congressional map that would have favored their party in the 2026 elections, a resounding rejection of a plan pushed by Cankles to help his floundering GOP win all nine of the state’s congressional districts.

Twenty-one senators from the Republican supermajority and all 10 of the chamber’s Democrats voted down the redistricting proposal, which would have split the city of Indianapolis into four districts and potentially eliminated the districts of the state’s two Democratic congressional representatives.

Good on the Indiana GOP.

For a second time in a week, a federal grand jury in Virginia has refused to indict New York Attorney General Letitia James for alleged mortgage fraud and once again told Pam Bondi and her criminal DOJ to pound sand.

My guess is that Pam Bondi will run around Virginia looking for a court to do her dirty work for her but it looks like she won’t have any luck.

Illinois Democrat Representative Delia Ramirez is pressing the House Judiciary Committee to begin impeachment hearings into Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem AKA Border Barbie AKA DogKiller Kristi AKA Koncentration Kamp Kristi.

Michigan Democrat Representative Haley Stevens filed articles of impeachment against HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. on a litany of charges mostly related to his efforts to roll back public health measures.

Another Michigan Democrat, Representative Shri Thanedar  filed articles of impeachment against Defense Secretary DUI-hire Pete Hegseth over both Signalgate and a reported double-tap strike on an alleged Venezuelan drug boat in the Caribbean.

If we take the House in November these criminals can be removed from office.

The Secretary of State is America’s top diplomat managing foreign policy, negotiations, passports, and advising the President, but in the case of Marco Rubio it’s also Font Control.

You see, last week Rubio  ordered American diplomats to use the Times New Roman font in official communications and drop Calibri, which was brought in during the Joe Biden administration and is now described as a “woke” font.

Seriously.

As the cost of nearly everything is going up, and the so-called president says the affordability crisis is a Democratic hoax, Ohio GOP Senator Jon Husted has a solution:  

“Look, there are three ways to make things more affordable: earn more, keep more of what you earn, and drive down prices.”

Or maybe vote these self-entitled, multimillionaires who don’t worry about the costs of things out of office.

Nancy Mace, South Carolina’s GOP loon of a Representative is playing the ‘poor me’ card:

“We have to take our security very seriously, if you’re conservative, if you’re well known, if you have fought the transgender community exponentially like I have, in the wake of Charlie Kirk’s public assassination— the death threats, the amount of political violence, the celebration of the killing of conservatives is deeply disturbing …  I had an incident just three weeks ago — it was the last time I was in public — I had a leftist person come up to me aggressively, physically threaten me in front of a group of people, including my security.”

In the three weeks that Mace claims to have been in hiding, she’s made a least a dozen appearances on cable news and has voted on multiple bills before the House, including just a few minutes ago, so once again Nancy Mace shows herself to be a liar.

Cankles and several administration officials have already informally discussed the idea of preemptively pardoning an array of his advisers, policymakers, and others who the president believes will likely be criminally investigated once Democrats are back in power.

But, gosh, is this the regime admitting they are criminals if they are seeking pardons before any charges, much less any investigations, occur?

Ahead of his reelection bid next year, Senator, and former Miss South Carolina Magnolia Queen, Lindsey Graham dropped his support for the Dream Act, a bill to help undocumented immigrants and a bill that he co-sponsored each time it was introduced for nearly a decade, saying:

“Yeah, there will be no Dream Act. Not until you deal with the millions of people here illegally.”

Is he suggesting there are now more undocumented immigrants in this country than were here for the last ten years or … is he just following orders from Cankles so he can have his cotillion at Mar-Illegal?

House Speaker Mike Johnson said the military’s decision to attack an alleged drug-smuggling vessel for a second time to kill survivors of an initial strike was “entirely appropriate” and followed Defense Department rules.

How Christ-like.

Erika Kirk, AKA The Grieving Grifter,  says some of her late husband’s controversial comments, lacked context and that he should not “be deteriorated” to a few sentences. Things like:

“MLK was awful. He's not a good person. He said one good thing he actually didn't believe.”

“There is no separation of church and state. It’s a fabrication, it’s a fiction, it’s not in the constitution. It’s made up by secular humanists.

“The Democrat Party supports everything that God hates,

“This is something that I hope will make Taylor Swift more conservative. Engage in reality more… Reject feminism. Submit to your husband, Taylor. You're not in charge.”

“Black Women do not have the brain processing power to be taken seriously.”

Yes, Erika, I see exactly what you mean … about how Charlie said women should submit their husbands and how they are not I charge and yet here you are making money off the fetid corpse of your former racist husband.

Take a seat, grifter.

Cankles went to the Army-Navy game to do the coin toss and proved himself a bumbling buffoon who cannot even toss a coin; in fact, he looks like he setting a baby bird free, and then points to the ground like a child to where the coin landed:

Help us!

Ain't That America XVII

Well, the retribution has begun as Cankles is siccing his DOJ Lapdog Pammy Jo Bondi on his so-called enemies … he’s asking to release the Amelia Earhart files because of Jeffrey Epstein … he’s doxing Democrats … Border Barbie is helping her friends and donors while others suffer … and more. On the upside, Melanie has released a line of Christmas Ornaments … I haven’t seen them but I imagine they were created in the Devil’s Sweatshop with child labor … so let’s go ….

Cankles wants to release the files about Amelia Earhart and there are two possible reasons. One, a donor of his paid him to do it, or … Two, he needs another distraction from the Epstein Files.

Personally, I think that unless Amelia Earhart crashed on Epstein Island, no one cares.

Democrat Representative Mikie Sherrill and other leading Democrats want an investigation into a politically motivated leak by Cankles and the GOP of Sherrill’s unredacted military service records, which included her Social Security number and other personal details, to her GOP opponent in the New Jersey gubernatorial election.

This is the game they’re playing, putting out personal information of their opponents which could endanger their lives and their families.

Mob Boss Cankles is behind this.

For months, the complaints have rolled in from parts of the country hit by natural disasters that FEMA was moving too slowly in sending aid to communities ravaged by floods and hurricanes. Many officials blamed Koncentration Kamp Kristi Noem, whose agency oversees FEMA, after records obtained by ProPublica show how one locality found a way to get FEMA aid more quickly: ask one of Border Barbie’s political donors for help.

Those records show that Noem expedited more than $11 million of federal money to rebuild a historic pier in Naples, Florida that was damaged by Hurricane Ian in 2022, after a major donor contacted her. Noem flew to Naples on a government plane to tour the pier herself, and then had dinner with the donor, local cardiologist Sinan Gursoy.

Noem’s top adviser, and ALLEGED lover Corey Lewandowski, also owns a home in Naples near the pier; Lewandowski is an unpaid staffer—I’m thinking Staffer With Benefits—at DHS serving as Noem’s de facto chief of staff.

Grifters and liars and cheaters.

Texas GOP Gover Hot Wheels AKA Greg Abbott has signed a bill to restrict which restrooms transgender people can use in government buildings and schools and fines institutions up to $125,000 for violations.

Texas which has seen power grid outages, hurricanes, floods, school shootings, church shooting and all kinds of violence is more concerned about who pees where and not about taking care of the citizens of the state.

When Cankles took office eight months ago, the DOJ 36 experienced attorneys assigned full-time to investigate corrupt politicians and police officers; today it has two. The other thirty-four have either quit under pressure, resigned in protest or been detailed to other matters across the nation.

It’s almost like the Cankles Regime doesn’t want lawyers to look into corruption. I wonder why.

Bill Berrien, a Republican running for governor  of Wisconsin, is a so-called conservative who stands up for family values, and is especially critical of transgender individuals, saying they are engaged in “radical social experimentation.”

But, big surprise,  Berrien’s online footprint tells a different story: on Medium.com Berrien has an account that follows transgender porn star Jiz Lee and the authors of sexually explicit essays, like Octavio Morrison, author of “7 Types of Orgasmic Sensations” and Emma Austin, who has posted items such as “Pegging is A-OK,” and “I Love Getting Jackhammered.” In the past, he “liked” an article on “Polyamory Today” entitled, “My Husband Loves Watching Me Flirt With Another Man.”

Every GOP accusation is an admission, especially given that Berrien has been voraciously trying to scrub his dirty little online secrets.

UPDATE Bill Berrien has ended his Republican campaign for governor.

Exactly two months after Cankles signed his so-called Big Beautiful Bill a Virginia health care company blamed the law for the closure of three rural clinics serving communities along the Blue Ridge Mountains. The closures, Augusta Medical Group said in its statement, were part of the company’s “ongoing response to the One Big Beautiful Bill Act and the resulting realities for healthcare delivery.”

Keep this in mind as we move ahead and vote; the GOP passed this bill and now people in rural Virginia have far less access to healthcare.

At the UN last week, war criminal and Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu told fellow world leaders that Israel “must finish the job” against Hamas in Gaza, giving a defiant speech despite growing international isolation over his refusal to end the devastating war in Gaza.

As he spoke dozens of delegates from multiple nations walked out of the General Assembly hall en masse.

The US delegation, which has backed Netanyahu, stayed put but neither the US nor the UK sent their most senior officials or even their UN ambassador to their section.

Hundreds of federal employees who lost their jobs in Leon Skum’s cost-cutting blitz are now being asked to return to work and the General Services Administration has given the employees until the end of the week to accept or decline reinstatement.

No one saw this coming … except for everyone but Cankles and his Minions.

Democrat Adelita Grijalva won a special election for the Arizona congressional seat held by her late father. Grijalva, a former Pima County supervisor and Tucson school board member, captured Arizona’s 7th Congressional District, which includes Tucson, and will serve out the remaining 15 months of her father, Representative Raúl Grijalva’s term after he passed away in March.

On the down side, Little Mike Johnson is putting off swearing her in as she would be another vote to release the Epstein  Files and Little Mike is Cankles' Little Bitch.

The Wall Street Journal, its parent company and Rupert Murdoch asked a federal judge to dismiss Cankles’ $10 billion defamation lawsuit over the publication’s report on his relationship with BFF Jeffrey Epstein.

Cankles claimed that the article could damage the reputation, hold for laughter, of a man who cheated on his first wife with the woman who became his second wife , and the cheated on his second wife with the Slovenian Hooker who became his third wife, and then cheated on his third wife with a porn star, all the while bragging about grabbing women by the pussy and being a sexual predator with Jeffrey Epstein.

Seriously? That reputation?

Participants gathered on the Melbourne Causeway in Florida to shine a Rainbow light on LGBTQ rights with the Light Up Melbourne with Pride event. Participants marched to the top of the causeway and lit it up in support of LGBTQ+ Americans.

This comes on the heels, the Gogo boot heels, of Governor Ronnie DeSantis who has banned the painting on sidewalks and crosswalks in the Rainbow colors.

Sorry, Ronnie, you cannot erase us.

And speaking of Melbourne, Florida … a push to rename a street in Melbourne after conservative activist Charlie Kirk has failed.

The Melbourne City Council voted down the proposal during a tense meeting when council chambers were packed with people who wanted to voice their opinions on Charlie Kirk and whether or not a road in the city should be named after him.

Good.

US District Judge Rita Lin of the Northern District of California has ordered the Cankles Regime to restore $500 million in UCLA medical research grants, halting for now a nearly two-month funding crisis that UC leaders said threatened the future of the nation’s premier public university system.

The opinion added hundreds of UCLA’s NIH grants to an ongoing class-action lawsuit that already led to the reversal of tens of millions of dollars in grants from the National Science Foundation, Environmental Protection Agency, National Endowment for the Humanities and other federal agencies to the University of California.

Lin ruled that the NIH grants were suspended by form letters that were unspecific to the research, a likely violation of the Administrative Procedure Act, which regulates executive branch rulemaking.

This week Cankles’ lapdog FCC Chair Brendan Carr was seen wearing a gold Cankles-Head lapel pin.

Members of the Fascist Cabinet as well as Congressional GOP goose-steppers are also wearing the pin lest they  suffer the wrath of their Dear Cult Leader.

We talked earlier about the “unendable” wars that Cankle says he ended since flopping his gelatinous buttocks in the Oval Office and so, here they are:

Egypt and Ethiopia have argued over an Ethiopian dam project on the Blue Nile, but they were not in a raging war in which thousands of people were being killed.

He also did not stop the conflict between Serbia and Kosovo from resuming because they were also not at war.

The conflict involving the Democratic Republic of Congo and neighboring Rwanda has not actually been resolved.

And India denies that Cankles was responsible for mediating its ceasefire, its truce, with neighboring Pakistan.

So, yeah, he lied … and no one is surprised … but wait, there’s more:

Cankles says grocery prices are down during his presidency but the fact is prices are up and going higher because of his tariffs.

Cankles says inflation has been defeated but the fact is that it’s also accelerating., up 2.9% last month, from 2.7% previously.

Cankles said European electricity bills are high,--which is true—but that ours are coming way down when the fact is electricity bills are up over 6.2% from when Biden was in office.

Cankles claimed that he has secured $17 trillion in investment in the US and yet his own White House Press Secretary, KaroLying Leavitt says it was $9 trillion in investment; did someone lose $8 trillion?

Cankles says China builds a lot of wind turbines and manufactures them for others, but barely uses wind power but, again, the fact is that China is the world leader in the use of wind power.

The man is delusional AF.

After Dr. RFK BrainWorm announced that Tylenol causes autism he pushed a “cure” for it, something called Leucovorin [folic acid]. Of note, is that Dr. Snake Oil Salesman Oz’s supplement company, iHerb, sells  folic acid so it looks like BrainWorm is trying to make coins for Snake Oil.

US Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent pledged to provide “all options for stabilization” to Argentine President Javier Milei as the South American country faces a market selloff in recent weeks. Options include, but aren’t limited to, currency swap lines, direct currency repurchases and US dollar-denominated debt from the Treasury’s exchange stabilization fund.

Funny, he wants to save Argentina’s economy while he destroys the American economy.

Slovenian Hooker and Floor Lamp Model Melanie has unveiled a line of Christmas ornaments―but fans … fans?? Seriously—will have to cough up $90 a piece or almost $500 for a set of six. But I do have a question: will there be ornaments with one of Melanie’s most famous phrases:

“Who gives a fuck about Christmas?”

Remember, Melanie was caught on tape uttering that line! And so I say:

“Who gives a fuck about giving coins to the Slovenian Hooker wife of a Fascist Pig?”

Not me.

Spend your money on better things, like donations to Blue candidates and then …

The Funny Papers

Marc Murphy, Jesse Duquette, Matt Davies, RJ Matson, Max Espinoza, Michael de Adder, Lalo Alcaraz, Gary Huck, Daniel Boris

Bobservations

The other night I was cleaning up after dinner and I saw something on the countertop and I politely said to Carlos:

“What in the holy hell is this Jed Clampett, petrified wood  contraption doing on my counter?”

“I was hoping you’d see it.”

“See it, it confirms that we are officially white trash.”

The ‘it’ in question was a whisk that Carlos thought needed a bigger handle so he went into the yard and cut a branch off a tree and turned that into a handle. He then, apparently, used the whisk to stir the Special Roadkill Stew he’d prepared for dinner.

It’s not really much of a struggle for Tuxedo, but he is doing his part and being very patrioti-cat.

It’s kind of shocking that Florida can build a Concentration Camp in the Everglades in four days but can’t help its own citizens in an actual hurricane.

There’s a reason why the “Big Beautiful Bill’s” Medicaid cuts don’t hit until 2027. The GOP planned to blow it up after the Midterms to blame the Democrats whom they are afraid will be taking over Congress.

Don’t forget the truth.

Sometimes, just walking through a meadow in the middle of nowhere you can spot some cakes in the wild.

The other morning after breakfast I was in the bedroom changing into a pair of Causal-Lay-About-The-House-Because-It’s-Sunday-and-I-Want-To-Read shorts … specifically the black ones. I said to Carlos:

“Have you seen my black shorts?”

“I haven’t seen any black shorts in about three years.”

I guffawed.

“Blind humor is funny. But I can’t find my black shorts.”

“Are they in the laund-“

“No.”

“Are they in the hamp-“

“No.”

“Are they in another drawe-“

“No.”

“Are you wearing them already.”

Silence.

“And they call me the blind one.”

Last week y’all weighed in on The Great Kitchen Island Debate going on at Casa Bob y Carlos where Carlos didn’t want his sheet pans stored on the other side of the island from where there are now because he didn’t want to have to walk the 24 inches …

This week I spoke with the cabinet maker and they have faux door panels so we can move the door to Sheet Pan Central to where it’s always been and leave everything else as designed with faux door panels making it all look seamless.

Happy now?

Mexico’s President Claudia Sheinbaum has sent a group of firefighters and rescue personnel to help search for flood victims in Texas. After all the hate from this regime. After all the racism toward brown people from this regime. After all the anti-immigration policies aimed at brown people. She helped. She did the right thing … for a Red state that would never do the same for her.

That’s leadership and power; that’s a woman.

Julian Morris is a 42-year-old British actor who is married to fellow actor Landon Ross and likes taking off his clothes; but enough about that, Would You Hit It?