Tuesday Thought #1

The Funny Papers

Clay Bennett, David Horsey, Michael de Adder, Drew Sheneman, Dave Whamond, Darrin Bell, Kevin Siers, Mike Luckovich, Nick Anderson, Michael de Adder

Tuesday Thought #4

The Funny Papers

Mike Smith, Clay Bennett, Darrin Bell, David Fitzsimmons, Michael de Adder, Ed Hall, Jack Ohman, Dave Whamond, Nick Anderson, Deb Milbrath

The Funny Papers

Scott Stantis, Adam Zyglis, Drew Sheneman, Ed Wexler, Kevin Siers, John Cole, Bill Bramhall, Clay Bennett, Steve Breen, Mike Luckovich, Steve Sack, Michael de Adder

Day Three: Democratic National Convention ... Or I'm with Joe ... Or I Love My President

While some at the Democratic National Convention took a He-Who-Will-Not-Be-Mentioned approach in their speeches this week, former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg played the [t]Rump Card, and played it hard:

"I'm a New Yorker, and New Yorkers know a con when we see one."

Bloomberg — who has been a Democrat, a Republican, and an Independent — said he votes the person, not the ticket, and then gave Hillary Clinton his resounding endorsement:

"I know what it's like to have neither party represent my views or values ... There are times when I disagree with Hillary Clinton. But let me tell you, whatever our disagreements may be, I've come here to say: We must put them aside for the good of our country. And we must unite around the candidate who can defeat a dangerous demagogue."

And as a businessman, he took on [t]Rump]’s business dealings and laid out the [t]Rump style plainly, clearly:

"We've heard a lot of talk in this campaign about needing a leader who understands business. I couldn't agree more. I've built a business, and I didn't start it with a million-dollar check from my father. … But Trump's business plan is a disaster in the making. … Throughout his career, Trump has left behind a well-documented record of bankruptcies, thousands of lawsuits, angry shareholders and contractors who feel cheated, and disillusioned customers who feel ripped off." Trump says he wants to run the nation like he's run his business. God help us."

But the best part of all was when he took on [t]Rump’s habit of saying one thing and doing another — like bringing business back to this country while having his line of suits made in China:

"Truth be told, the richest thing about Donald Trump is his hypocrisy. … He says he wants to deport 11 million undocumented people, but he seems to have no problem in hiring them. What'd I miss here?"

But then he went back to Hillary and talked of how, in the days after 9/11, as New York’s new mayor, he personally witnessed Clinton's work ethic in public office:

"I saw how Hillary Clinton worked with Republicans in Washington to ensure that New York got the help it needed to recover and rebuild. Throughout her time in the Senate, we didn't always agree — but Hillary Clinton always listened. And that's the kind of approach we need in Washington today, and it just has to start in the White House ... so let's elect a sane, competent person with international experience … Hillary Clinton.”

Ouch. Elect the sane, competent choice. Poor [t]Rump.

Tim Kaine, who calls himself boring, but is the Vice Presidential nominee, took the stage and laid things out pretty simply:

"I trust Hillary Clinton."

And that’s Tim Kaine’s job, to show he trusts Hillary and to show those on both sides who still have their doubts — as misguided as I think they are — that they, too, can trust her:

"I want to tell you why I trust Hillary Clinton. On a personal level, as [our son] is serving our nation abroad, I trust Hillary Clinton with [his] life."

Not [t]Rump who will only exacerbate the anti-American sentiment around the world with his Muslim bans and calls for torture, and his hate speech.

“[But] you know who I don't trust? Donald Trump. The guy promises a lot. But you might have noticed, he has a habit of saying the same two words right after he makes his biggest promises … “Believe me.”

And then he channeled [t]Rump:

“’It’s gonna be great -- believe me! We're gonna build a wall and make Mexico pay for it -- believe me! We're gonna destroy ISIS so fast -- believe me! There's nothing suspicious in my tax returns -- believe me!’"

And that’s gonna be the dig that Kaine carries with him: [t]Rump]s taxes, because I’ve a feeling that, just like Mittsy in 2012, we have a billionaire running for office who pays less in taxes than the average schoolteacher, and so how can we expect that kind of man to know what’s right, and what’s best for any class but the wealthy?

That is a [t]Rump presidency in Tim Kaine’s mind — and in mine, too: one of hate, division, lack of real leadership, bigotry and lies. I trust that Tim Kaine and Hillary Clinton will do better than that.

Trust.

Like I trust Joe. Middle Class Joe, he joked … but to me he’s just a Regular Joe. Joe Biden. I wonder what this election cycle might have looked like had he chosen to run, though I understand the reasons — the death of his son, Beau — that formed his decision not to run. But still, imagine …

After an emotional tribute to Beau — he is a proud father, after all — Joe took on [t]Rump, often using his own words against him:

“We should really think about this. [Trump’s] cynicism is unbounded. His lack of empathy and compassion can be summed up in a phrase I think he’s really proud of: ‘You’re fired.’ How can there be pleasure in saying you’re fired?’”

He was outraged, saying we have all been raised better than that, except for [t]Rump who finds it all so funny.

“He’s saying he cares about the middle class. Give me a break! That’s a bunch of malarkey. This guy doesn’t have a clue about the middle class, not a clue. He has no clue about what makes America great.”

Slow beat … wait for applause … and then:

“Actually, he has no clue, period.”

But Joe wasn’t finished:

“No major party nominee in the history of this nation has ever known less or has been less prepared to deal with our national security. We cannot elect a man who exploits our fear of ISIS and other terrorists, who has no plan, … a man who embraces the tactics of our enemies: torture, religious intolerance … We cannot elect a man who belittles our closest allies while embracing dictators like Vladimir Putin, a man who confuses bluster with strength. We simply cannot let that happen as Americans, period.”

Plain talk from a Regular Joe, who ended his speech plainly and simply:

“It’s never, never, never been a good bet to bet against America. Americans have never, ever, ever let their country down. Never. Never. We are America, second to none, and we own the finish line! Don’t forget it! We’re America!”

I think Hillary needs to get Joe by her side and out on the campaign trail to keep it simple, keep it regular, keep it Joe.

But finally, the best for last … President Barack Obama.

I have, at times, been frustrated by Obama, as I have been frustrated by every elected official because, you know, politics is hard; it can be a game; it can be ugly; and there were times when  it got ugly, and personal, that I wished Barack Obama had acted as though he had no f**ks left to give.

But, I learned the other night from Michelle Obama that when the other side goes low, Obama goes high. And he went high last night, too.

He reminded us of some of the hopes we’d had when we elected him — twice — and the changes we’ve seen during his tenure:  making healthcare "a right for everybody;" an historic global climate agreement,; and the one that affected me most personally: full marriage equality. But he admitted that there was still work to be done and that we needed to make the right choice this November:

Hillary Clinton.

He recalled the race he ran against Hillary back in 2008 and joked:

"It was tough, because Hillary's tough. She was doing everything I was doing, but just like Ginger Rogers, it was backwards and in heels." 

And then he reminded us that, when she lost, she got up, and stood by his side, and helped him win the election that year, and now he’s here to return the favor because, out of any of the candidates running, and especially compared to one, she is by far the most qualified:

"You know, nothing truly prepares you for the demands of the Oval Office. You can read about it, you can study it, but until you've sat at that desk, you don't know what it's like to manage a global crisis or send young people to war. … Hillary's been in the room; she's been part of those decisions. She knows what's at stake in the decisions our government makes for the working family, the senior citizen, the small business owner, the soldier, and the veteran. Even in the midst of crisis, she listens to people and keeps her cool and treats everybody with respect. And no matter how daunting the odds, no matter how much people try to knock her down, she never, ever quits. … I can say with confidence there has never been a man or a woman — not me, not Bill, nobody — more qualified than Hillary Clinton to serve as President of the United States of America." 

And then he compared the two frontrunners for the White House and did not mince words … or have any f**ks left to give:

"I have to say, I know plenty of businessmen and women who've achieved success without leaving a trail of lawsuits and unpaid workers and people feeling like they got cheated. Does anyone really believe that a guy who's spent his 70 years on this Earth showing no regard for working people is suddenly going to be your champion? Your voice?"

And he rejected [t]Rump’s view of America:

“We are not a fragile or frightful people. Our power doesn’t come from some self-declared savior promising that he alone can restore order. We don’t look to be ruled. … America has never been about what one person says he’ll do for us. It’s always been about what can be achieved by us, together, through the hard, slow, sometimes frustrating, but ultimately enduring work of self-government.”

And then he spoke about the America he knows:

“The America I know is full of courage, and optimism, and ingenuity. The America I know is decent and generous. Sure, we have real anxieties — about paying the bills, protecting our kids, caring for a sick parent. We get frustrated with political gridlock, worry about racial divisions; are shocked and saddened by the madness of Orlando or Nice. There are pockets of America that never recovered from factory closures; men who took pride in hard work and providing for their families who now feel forgotten. Parents who wonder whether their kids will have the same opportunities we have.”

He reminisced about the values of his grandparents:

"They didn't like show-offs. They didn't admire braggarts or bullies. Instead, they valued traits like honesty and hard work. That's why anyone who threatens our values, whether fascists or communists or jihadists or homegrown demagogues, will always fail in the end."

But then he brought it all back around to where it started … hope:

“Most of all, I see Americans of every party, every background, every faith who believe that we are stronger together — black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American; young and old; gay, straight, men, women, folks with disabilities, all pledging allegiance, under the same proud flag, to this big, bold country that we love. … Tonight, I ask you to do for Hillary Clinton what you did for me; I ask you to carry her the same way you carried me. It's been you who've fueled my dogged faith in our future, even when the odds are great, even when the road is long. Hope in the face of difficulty; hope in the face of uncertainty; the audacity of hope!"

Hope. Hope versus fear, Clinton versus [t]Rump. Qualified versus bombastic. The choice seems clear. 

But I need to say one more thing: I’ve voted a lot, for presidents, for governor, senators, congressman and women, mayors, city council,, class presidents. Whatever. But, I have never been more proud of a president of this country than I have been of Barack Obama and for that one reason that Michelle talked about the other night.

Think of all the attacks, personal, hate-filled, racist attacks, made against him by, not only, average Americans but political leaders and colleagues over the last eight years, and remember how he responded: dignified, respectful, taking the high road.

He is a man of intelligence and grace and compassion and hope and, while he does see the need for change, and continued change, he wants to change toward hope, not fear.

They say electing Hillary Clinton will be like electing Obama to a third term; I say, that sounds like a keen idea.

NJ.Com

CNN: Bloomberg
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Mother Jones
PoliticusUSA
Indian Express

I Didn't Say It....Monday Edition

Matthew Mitcham, out Australian diver, on being an outspoken LGBT advocate:

"I certainly don't see it as a burden. I never did, especially with how much attention the LGBT cause has been getting lately with marriage equality...and with how few openly gay sports stars there are around at the moment. I don't mind attention being put on it. Ideally I would like one day for sexuality to be as unimportant and uninteresting as hair colour, or eye colour or even just gender in general. One day it will get to that. But until it is easy for sports people to come out without fear of persecution or fear of lost sponsorship income and stuff like that, or fear of being comfortable in the team environment, I don't mind attention being brought to my sexuality in the hope that it might make other people feel more comfortable … in being comfortable enough about who they are in their sporting environment."

Obviously, we need more out athletes, willing to speak up for the LGBT community.

Mitcham has paved the way, as Greg Louganis did before him, and now other athletes, straight and especially gay, need to speak up.

Michael Bloomberg, NYC mayor, on the NRA and the Stand Your Ground laws:

"These laws are vigilantism masquerading as self-defense, and getting 25 states to pass them is one of the best con jobs the NRA’s leaders have ever pulled off. They don’t give a damn whether innocent people are shot and killed. And they don’t give a damn about the integrity of the American justice system. They want to create a nation where disputes are settled by guns instead of gavels, and where suspects are shot by civilians instead of arrested by police. These laws destabilize our justice system, they degrade our society, and they destroy innocent lives. We can’t be silent — and we can’t let them stand."

That whole 'Guns Don't Kill People, People Kill People' bull really irks me.

It should be 'People With Guns Kill People'. 

Or 'Peaople Who Shouldn't Have Guns, But Can Get Them Easier Than Buying A Bottle Of Gin, Kill People'.

Mark Morford, San Francisco Chronicle columnist, on the Homophobes Are Gay theory:

"Really, who doesn't already know? Who among us with the slightest acumen toward self-reflection doesn't fully understand that the more you wail against something, the more violently outspoken or hateful you are against this or that perceived indiscretion, sexual proclivity, perversion, deviance, expression, delight, taste sensation, the more certain it is that said deliciousness secretly attracts you, turns you on and makes you enormously, terrifically scared? Case after case, priest after priest, GOP senator after megachurch pastor after spittle-flecked Tea Party zealot -- all suddenly caught pants down in a bathroom stall, in a leather bar, gay chat room, in a Grindr hookup app, living out their real and honest selves even as they rail and oppose and thump their Bibles everywhere else. Hypocrisy, thy name is homophobe. Which is, essentially, exactly what the study found. One's level of homophobia lies, quite frequently, in direct proportion to one's own brutally closeted desire for homosexual sex. Result: self-denial, self hatred, wailing and thrashing and Prop 8-ing against an unfair world." -  writing about the just-released study on the cause of homophobia."

How many anti-gay, bathroom stall toe-tappers must we endure before we understand that the most vile homophobes are actually gay men and women who are so deeply closeted, and so self-loathing, that they, in effect, attack other gays to make themselves feel somehow 'safe'?

Harry Jackson, "Bishop", still whining about marriage equality:

"Same-sex marriage isn't about civil rights. It's about our civil responsibilities. As Americans and as people of faith, we have a duty to stand up, engage, and speak the truth about marriage. And when we all stand in unity, no one can stop us. Same-sex marriage supporters have it all backward. It is the Democratic Party elites and gay marriage leaders that are pushing an agenda of division."

Hmmm, the Democrats are pushing division.

And they do that by demanding equality for all.

How divisive, Harry, how divisive.

Ken Hutcherson, "pastor", on being born gay:

"There is no evidence at all that the homosexual was born that way. I guarantee you I was. I was born this way. I was born black, I’m living black, I’m going to die black. You know we find out there’re criminal genes, they say, in some people. But do you know how to get rid of criminal gene? Two parents with a belt gets rid of the criminal gene. Discipline, understanding, good parenting removes the homosexual gene."

Oh, Ken, me thinks you're one of those homophobes with a secret, you spend so much time and effort on The Gays.

Comparing us to criminals? Been done before and people don't buy it.

But, you suggest that parents maybe beat The Gay out of their children? So, you advocate child abuse? How effing Christ-like.

But, Kenny, what about the kids in school, who think like you, that The Gay needs to be beat out of people? Are they given your permission to beat other kids, bully other kids, kill other kids?

Don't call yourself a man of God when you're a mate of Hate.

Anne Graham Lotz, daughter of Billy Graham, on North Carolina, God, and marriage equality:

"Because we live in such perilous, unstable times economically, environmentally, politically, globally, racially and even religiously, we need the security that comes from God's protection and blessing. This is not the time to defy Him by flaunting an institution He has clearly ordained, thus provoking His displeasure. Please join me in praying that God's institution of marriage would be preserved and protected in North Carolina...for our own good."

Check your facts Anne.

Marriage has been in a state of flux since it began.

Marriages today bear little resemble to marriages of old.

And God has other things to worry about, other than Adam and Steve, or Madam and Eve, getting hitched.

Madonna, telling NBC's Harry Smith how she can scold her daughter, Lourdes, for smoking, and yet smoke herself in videos:

"That's just an accessory, Harry. There's a difference."

Um....it's not an accessory. That would be a purse or a pair of shoes.
And there is a difference between an accessory and a cigartette, Madge.

Your child sees you smoke, and acting like it's all hip and cool, and she begins to smoke.

Typical Madge, trying to spin something negative--like lackluster album sales--into something positive.
Cop to it, or I'll start sending hydrangeas your way.

Bill O'Reilly, on Glee making kids "experiment" with being gay or transgender:

"If you make the behavior of these people ... if children hear it, unsupervised children, okay who don’t have parents watching their -- they might go out and experiment with this stuff...When I was a teenager and I saw James Dean smoking, it made me want to smoke...a lot of these dopey kids are confused about who they are. They’re confused."

Haven't heard from O'Reilly too much of late.

Haven't missed his illiterate rants.

Seeing someone smoke is quite different than seeing two men kiss. If you're straight, you might wanna smoke, but you won't wanna kiss a boy.

Or think you're transgendered.

But, listening to your idiotic rants does make people lose brain cells, so, there's that......

Gretchen Carlson, FuxNews "commentator", agreeing with O'Reilly:

"I wholeheartedly believe, in today’s society, that kids are experimenting with homosexuality. We see it in celebrities who maybe just do it on the side, and it may be drug-fueled...I totally agree with Bill that this causes kids to experiment. And if we didn’t– why do we have any rules in society then if we don’t try and set some parameters for our children to live their lives? I just think that this is way over the top."

If people 'experiment' with homosexuality, they're doing so because they believe they are gay, or maybe bisexual.

I was born gay, Gretchen, and IO saw all kinds of men and women on TV and in the movies having sex, and I never once thought about having sex with a woman.

Oh, and you're an idiot.