It's Snarkurday!

Rule # 1: Never piss off the Queen. Not a queen, mind you, but The Queen, as in Elizabeth of England.

It seems that HRH is a little pissy that Princess Kate went to Wimbledon and met up with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, but couldn’t spare a moment to meet with UK veterans. Palace sources confided, and Royal Air Force officials confirmed, that Kate skipped a July 10 lunch in honor of WWII pilots attended by William and other royals, though she managed to squeeze in tennis and chats with Brangelina.

So, Queen Liz ain’t happy, and has, ALLEGEDLY, taken to calling her grandson’s bride and baby mama “Lazy Katie” and “Duchess of Do-Little.”

Duchess of Do-Little?  I.Am.Dying. Who knew the queen threw shade?

A couple of weeks ago we chatted about Tom Selleck stealing water from fire hydrants to use on his avocado farm, and to hydrate that tumbleweed above his upper lip.

Well, the minute that the private investigator returned to the Calleguas Municipal Water District headquarters with proof of the H2O thievery, a lawsuit was filed, and as soon as the lawsuit was filed, Tom Selleck stepped up to pay for the water. And the water district has voted to accept his payment of $21,000 to settle the lawsuit.

So, wait, is Tom Selleck the Wimpy of water thievery? I mean, will he gladly pay you tomorrow for the water he stole today?

So, Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert, country singing darlings and once happily wed sweethearts are divorcing. And it all seemed pretty quiet and private and amicable.

Not so much now. Rumor has it Team Miranda blamed Blake for cheating with another country singer, then Team Blake countered by saying Miranda caused the divorce by refusing to have children. And then they threw down their own cheating rumor, claiming Miranda broke Blake’s heart, and the marriage, by getting busy with country singer Chris Young — who denies it — and perhaps a roadie or two.

So, was she getting’ boned by a singer who wasn’t her husband; or was he boning a singer who wasn’t his wife.

Either way you slice I smell some Country Number One Singles coming up from both Blake and Miranda.

In country music, what doesn’t kill you makes a great country song.

In a Bill Cosby Update:

His lawyers filed papers to block any further release of the deposition where he admitted to buying Quaaludes to give to women so he could rape them, and to stop the ugly release of Cosby’s statements about how he seduces young women while his wife sits at home waiting for him every night for fifty-some-odd years.

The deposition Bill threw up was part of the lawsuit filed against him by Andrea Constand who says he drugged and assaulted her in 2004. The case ended with a settlement, and so now Bill’s lawyers are claiming that since the deposition was released, the settlement agreement was violated and want their money back. But Andrea ain’t lying down for Cosby — not this time — and her own lawyers are trying to get the entire deposition released.

They should be careful not to drink the water at that mediation table lest Cosby drug them and make them sign a waiver saying they want to keep the deposition sealed.

I mean, ain’t that how The Cos rolls?

Are the rumors that Tommy Grrrl Cruise is ready to tie the knot for the fourth time true? And is his new bride really his twenty-two year old Katie Holmes look-alike assistant, Emily Thomas?

Rumor has it that Emily has been “quietly seeing the superstar since late 2014,” and Tom is reportedly “smitten” with her — and by that, he means he can control her. And this comes at the right time because Cruise has a new Mission Impossible knock-off to promote and what better way than to get married … I mean, it worked with Katie Holmes?

So, prepare for a Xenu wedding, followed by a Xenu baby, and then a quick escape by Wife #4.

Uh oh. Trouble in paradise … or at least a Kardastrophe version of reality TV paradise?

Apparently Kim Kash Kow Kardastrophe is furious with her current husband — not to be confused with her last or next husbands — Kanye Kardastrophe after she found him looking at nude photos of his ex-girlfriend Amber Rose on his computer.

No word if he was spanking Tiny Kanye while he studied the photo set.

So, I digs me some Taye Diggs — hat/tip to TV’s Jack McFarland for the line — and am especially excited that he is taking over the lead role in Broadway’s Hedwig and the Angry Inch.

But there’s a line in the show that some are wondering if it will stay in; see, while Taye as Hedwig sings a song with his co-star, he also sings the line:

“Idina sang it better.”

Idina would be Taye’s ex-wife, Broadway diva and former Wicked star, Idina Menzel. So people were shocked that he left the line in and sang it as written in rehearsal.

But they were equally stunned when, after singing the line, he ad-libbed a reference to Mendel’s hit tune from the movie “Frozen” when he looked at the rehearsal crowd and sang:

“Let it go.”

Too funny, and it would be fun if he kept it in the show … as long as Idina’s cool with it, you know.

I Didn't Say It ...

Taye Diggs, who will be taking on the role of trans East German rock star Hedwig on Broadway in Hedwig and the Angry Inch, on letting his "inner homosexual" out:

“I mean I went through a stage where I was a drag queen in high school in 10th and 11th grade. I experienced with homosexuality and ass play and so outside of that…I worked the streets…male prostitution — I’m kidding — [but] I have a flaming homosexual inside of me so I’m raring to let that out."

Oh Taye, you played me! I was thinking of you as a hot male prostitute, drag queen homosexual and that was almost too much.

Still, Taye Diggs; hot; hot; and hot.

[photo source]

Jon Stewart, on those “religious freedom” bills:

"It seems like gay marriage looms a lot larger in the minds of certain conservatives than it does in the Bible. And the only thing I would say is, don’t they sell cakes to sinners all the time? Adulterers? When you come in do you go 'I'd like a cake,' and they go 'Do you use the name of the Lord in vain?' How do you figure that out? It feels disingenuous."

Um, because it is; it’s homophobia and bigotry plain and simple, when you use your “Bible” to discriminate against one group of people, er, sinners, I’m guessing, while all the other sinners get a pass.

[photo source]

Cleve Jones, LGBT activist, marking Harvey Milk's 85th birthday:

"As I look back over the decades, I marvel at the progress our community has made in achieving our rights and know that Harvey would be proud. And as we wait for the Supreme Court’s decision on marriage equality, I know that Harvey would remind us that our struggle is not yet won — no matter what the court decides."

This will be a huge victory, no doubt, but we still I have gender inequality, workplace and housing discrimination, religious discrimination to fight against.

The war is not over, but we might be close to winning a big battle!

[photo source]

Karen Carter Peterson, Louisiana state senator, on Governor Bobby Jindal’s "religious freedom" executive order:

"We've heard him talk about how he feels about executive orders, but those are at the federal level. He don't like those. But today it's okay to just ignore the House and the clear rejection of something that's just not good for our state. He didn't even have the courage to testify before the House, but he wants to roll out a press release saying what he's going to do through executive action. But guess what he did have time to do? To start running commercial, not here in New Orleans, or Baton Rouge, or Monroe - he ran a religious freedom commercial in Iowa. Are you kidding me? Why don't you roll some commercials out on how to fix this nightmare that you've created right here in Louisiana? This is ridiculous.”

Bobby Jindal is just pandering and scheming and misrepresenting his own party, and his own state, for his own personal need to be president, which, let’s be queer, ain’t never gonna happen.

[photo source]

Evan Wolfson, head of Freedom To Marry, on Ireland’s vote for marriage equality:

"With a nationwide landslide in favor, Ireland now becomes the first country in the world to pass the freedom to marry by popular referendum, as well as the 21st nation and the 10th predominantly Catholic country in which same-sex couples can marry. … The global momentum for the freedom to marry reflects and reinforces the progress we are making here in the United States – and we look now to the Supreme Court to bring our country to national resolution, following Ireland’s good example." 

It’s time.

[photo source]

Frank Bruni, in the New York Times, on Catholics and same-sex marriage:

"Take a look at this list of countries: Belgium, Canada, Spain, Argentina, Portugal, Brazil, France, Uruguay, Luxembourg and Ireland. Name two things that they have in common. They don’t share a continent, obviously. Or a language. But in all of them, the Roman Catholic Church has more adherents, at least nominally, than any other religious denomination does. And all of them belong to the vanguard of 20 nations that have decided to make same-sex marriage legal."

That’s the part that amazes me most of all: that these predominantly Catholic countries are defying their churches and Pope Frankie and demanding LGBT equality.

And yet here in America lotsa gay folks can’t even get a wedding cake in places where it’s legal.

The march goes on.

[photo source]

Would You Hit It?

It's a simple question .... actor, singer, dancer, and married to separated from the faboosh Idina Menzel Taye Diggs..

Would.You.Hit.It?

Yes or No?

SAG Musings

I watched the SAG awards last night...well, okay, I DVR'd the SAG awards last night and watched them this morning, speeding through the winners I didn't like, didn't know, didn't care about, and therefore cutting a two hour show down to about forty minutes.

What did I learn?

Well, actors don't know any other comedic TV actors other than Alec Baldwin. Seriously, why does he win this award almost every year?


Julianna Margulis and Keith Lieberthal

 Julianna Margulies husband is very, very cute, and was giving a little gay vibe on my set. I paused, rewound, played it again. Same vibe. Now maybe he is, and maybe he isn't, but he sure is cute and shiny. 

Did someone finally tell Anette Benning that there are clothes designed after 1963, and that there is nothing wrong with combing her hair?

Why did Ed O'Neil accept the award for Modern Family's cast win? Ty Burrell would have been funnier. Hell, Annette Benning would have been funnier.


I kinda wish Jeff Bridges would lose the facial hair. he's hot with it, he's hotter without it. And that goes for Christian Bale, too.

Is anyone else getting a little tired of the Betty White sex jokes? I know that may sound blasphemous, but.....

When exactly did Jon Hamm become Kevin Kline?

Did Natalie Portman say asshole on TV? And, if she did, was it really necessary to bleep it out? I mean, she was talking about herself, you know.

Michael C. Hall was robbed. He's brilliant in Dexter. And Steve Buscemi still looks like Don Knotts. That isn't why he shouldn't have won, though. It's all about Dexter.

I have a suggestion for next year's SAG awards, and all awards shows in general. Have Taye Diggs host. Have Taye Diggs present every award. Make all the nominees stay at home so Taye Digs can accept the awards for them. In other words, make it all Taye, all the time.

Did you watch? And, if you did, wouldn't you want it All Taye, All The Time, too?