In Ain't One To Gossip But ...

It was never lost on anyone that it seemed weird that Sex and the City never had at least one Black friend—and Jennifer Hudson, as Carrie’s assistant, doesn’t count—but now, some twenty-three years after its premiere, the producers, including SJP, have finally noticed there are people of color in New York City.

You.Don’t.Say. Yes, I do, because now Nicole Ari Parker has been added to the reboot and it’s being reported that her character will fill the vacancy left by Kim Cattrall who has had enough of SJP and left the building.

The reboot, entitled And Just Like That… so no one shrieks, “Oh my god, not another sequel to this crap,” is currently shooting in NYC with SJP, Cynthia Nixon, Kristin Davis, and Nicole Ari Parker, playing Carrie Bradshaw’s new best friend, documentary-maker Lisa Todd Wexley.

Somewhere Kim Cattrall is reading this news and saying, “Meh.”

Just like the rest of us.

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Prince Harry fancies himself an environmental activist, even appearing … again … with Oprah Winfrey on her Apple TV+ series The Me You Can’t See to talk about an issue he is passionate about: climate change.

Nice, Harry, but then please explain why you took a rich friend’s private jet from Aspen to Santa Barbara playing in a charity polo match.

Charity good, private jet bad, Harry.

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In the latter part of the last century, actress Brett Butler was making millions from her hit sitcom Grace Under Fire based on her own life and stand-up comedy act. Trouble was, Butler had addiction issues, boundary issues—she allegedly bared her breasts to a twelve-year-old boy—and was difficult on set. Things got worse when Butler became addicted to Vicodin—which a doctor prescribed for sciatica—and began butting heads with the show’s creator Chuck Lorre—who would later have the same types of issues with Charlie Sheen on the set of Two and a Half Men. As Brett battled addiction, the show’s ratings fell and cast members began quitting. The show was canceled, and Brett left Hollywood to live on a farm in Rome, Georgia, until losing that to foreclosure.

She returned to Hollywood, ready to start her career over again, and is using GoFundMe to ask her fans to help her out even though she earned some $25 million from Grace. In the last decade she was cast on Sheen’s Anger Management for 38 episodes, did a few episodes of The Young and the Restless, appeared on The Leftovers, How To Get Away With Murder, The Walking Dead, and The Morning Show. She generally gets paid over the guild minimum and sometimes makes $5,000 for a one-day shoot, but doesn’t work that often, and, you know, it’s hard out there for a former millionaire and Butler struggles to pay her $2500-a-month rent and so is down to the social media money beg.

Sorry, hon, but you seem to think you’re owed something. And you aren’t. I remember when former Cosby Show actor Geoffrey Owens, who was struggling to make ends meet after the show ended, didn’t head to GoFundMe to have the public pay his bills but took a job at a Southern California Trader Joe’s. Maybe they’re hiring Brett …

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Kanye has recently filed papers with a California court to have his name legally changed from Kanye Omari West to … Ye.

I think he should change his name to ‘Who’.

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And speaking of Kardastrophe-adjacent folks, leave it to Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott to prove themselves tone-deaf … again.

Stormi Webster, the three-year-old love child of Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner, expressed an interest in how poor people get to school, her dad surprised her with a school bus of her own so she could experience what normal people do. And because Kardastrophe-adjacent people live on social media, Kylie shared Stormi’s shock-and-awe at the bus in her Instagram Stories.

I guess it’s lucky Stormi didn’t express an interest in rocket ships because then she’d be circling the globe about now.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

It was just three years ago that Demi Lovato suffered a heroin overdose, from which she recovered and decided to live a sober lifestyle.

Now Demi has decided to classify themselves—Lovato's pronouns are ‘they’ and ‘them’—as, ahem,  as “California sober,” meaning they can still smoke weed and drink.

Sounds to me like ‘California Sober’ is just the first step toward rehab or death.

Sorry, Demi, you can’t be ‘a little bit’ sober.

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Olivia Jade Giannulli, Lori Loughlin’s social-media-famous daughter and college-unworthy “rower”, has lashed out at the HBO Max reboot of Gossip Girl which, she says, claimed she capitalized on her parents’ college-admissions scandal and subsequent jail time.

On the show one character quipped that Olivia Jade raked in social media followers because her mom and dad sent to the Big Fuller House over cheating their daughters’ way into USC. 

Olivia Jade, clearly not the sharpest oar in the water—see what I did there? She faked photos of herself on the rowing team so I used oar and … I’ll stop—Tweeted back to the show:

“No, I didn’t.”

Wow, she’s quick. I’m surprised she couldn’t get into USC on her own merits. No, I’m not.

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This is the first ad for the Samantha-less reboot of Sex and the City  called  And Just Like That… Something Nobody Asked For. I kid, I added that last bit.

The three remaining ladies—Cynthia Nixon as Miranda, Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie, and Kristin Davis as Charlotte—are pictured strolling next to a trash can … which is where most of their careers went until someone sold this mess to HBO, and just look at their faces.

SJP’s says, “I’m getting more money than these two ho’s for this drivel.”

Kristen’s says, “Did I get enough Botox and fillers to make me look younger than SJP?”

And Nixon’s face says, “I was a candidate for governor and now I’m back to this shiz?”

Sorry HBO, no Samantha, no me.

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Can you feel the shift in the force after Meghan McCain announced she was leaving the show? It’s good, right? But Meghan, never one to do anything quietly, is responding to the haters and the gossipers who ruining the internet saying McCain was forced pout because no one on the show likes her. Meghan took to social media to respond like this, in a Tweet that has since been deleted:

“So much chatter, so much gossip, so many, many, many questions people are asking me this past week … I pride myself on always taking big risks, rolling the dice, and making unpredictable life and career choices. I’ve never fit in a box and I never will.”

She concluded the post with the New Hampshire state motto:

“Live free or die.”

All that’s missing is the foot stop, Meghan running down the hallway, a slamming door, and the sound of muffled tears in a pillow.

#ByeKaren

The only thing I’ll miss are those tragic daily hair accidents.

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Lotsa people are Team Britney, as the pop singer, Britney Spears, seeks to extricate herself from the conservatorship she’s been under for what seems like decades, but leave it to Madonna to overdo it … much like her face and makeup and, um, “singing’.

In her Instagram Stories, Madonna slammed the conservatorship and compared it to slavery and then positioned herself as a modern-day Harriet Tubman trying to steal Britney towards freedom:

“Give this woman her life back. Slavery was abolished so long ago! Death to the greedy patriarchy that has been doing this to women for centuries. This is a violating of human rights! Britney, we coming to get you out of jail!”

Cue Madge dropping from the ceiling of the courthouse and grabbing Britney up to safety. Then cue Madge trying to make some money off of it.

I think there’s room on the Karen Bench with Meghan.

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And now for something sweet and fun from a real star … Back in 1978 Dolly Parton was asked to pose for Playboy; she declined but did pose in the iconic bunny costume for a cover of the magazine. And Dolly infamously said she’d pose for Playboy when she was seventy-five.

Well, she’s seventy-five, but she has outlived Playboy, so did the next best thing. For her husband Carl Dean’s 79th birthday, Dolly recreated her Playboy cover and showed Carl and the world that she’s still got it, saying:

“Today is July 20. It’s my husband Carl’s birthday and you’re probably wondering why I’m dressed like this. Remember some time back I said I was going to pose for Playboy magazine when I was 75? Well, I’m 75 and they don’t have a magazine anymore but my husband always loved the original cover of Playboy, so I was trying to think of something to do to make him happy. He still thinks I’m a hot chick after 57 years—and I’m not going to try to talk him out of that. I did a little photoshoot in this little outfit and I had a cover made of the new Dolly. The first one, remember this? I was kind of a little butterball in that one. Well, I’m string cheese now. But he’ll probably think I’m cream cheese … I hope.”

Yes, ma’am.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

The Samantha-less revival of Sex and the City that no one other than Sarah Jessica Parker asked for will be more diverse.

No, seriously. The show will feature three women of color as regulars because, as the creators say, they can’t tell a story with an all-white cast because “it’s not reflective of New York. So they are being very, very conscious about understanding that New York has to reflect the way New York looks today.”

Today? Do they believe people of color only started living in NYC after the second film bombed? Perhaps, so, because they clearly had no problem with an all-white New York City when the show premiered in 1998, though they made a huge step forward when they added Jennifer Hudson, as New York’s only woman of color, in the first film, though JHud moved back to St. Louis so New York was all-white again by the second film.

But today, in 2021, the creators of Sex and the City want you to know that New York City is a more diverse city because they hired three people of color.

Sex and the City. Diversity. Nope.

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The U.S. government is suggesting that Kim Kardastrophe tried to smuggle an ancient Roman sculpture into the country.

The statue was detained at the U.S. border in 2016 after Masterpiece International, a logistics company that worked for Kardastrophe, tried to import it with the wrong documentation, causing Italian authorities to demand its return.

According to court documents, Kardastrophe bought the sculpture, known as Fragment of Myron’s Samian Athena, in 2016 from the Axel Vervoordt Gallery in Belgium, but that the piece was detained when it arrived in LA after authorities were alerted that it might be protected cultural property. Italian officials requested provenance details from Masterpiece International, which provided the sculpture’s sales invoice to Kardastrophe, as well as a previous invoice showing that Vervoordt had purchased the work from Galerie Chenel in Paris in 2012.

But there are discrepancies in the descriptions of the sculpture on the two invoices, with the 2012 statement calling it “a large, draped statue” with provenance from an “Old German Collection, bought before 1980,” and the Kardastrophe invoice describing it as a “fragment,” and containing handwritten notations indicating it had originated from Italy.

Huh, Kimmy sure smells like an ALLEGED art smuggler, but we won’t know for sure because she and Axel Vervoordt aren’t talking.

UPDATE Kimmy says she never purchased the statute and someone must have used her name. Seriously; that’s what she says.

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So, Bill and Melinda Gates are divorcing. Yawn. But what is interesting is that Bill apparently transferred $1.8 billion in stocks to Melinda Gates on the day she filed for divorce.

Wow, I remember breaking up with a boyfriend and he said I could take the coffee maker, and I thought that was generous.

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This week Channing Tatum was on The Kelly Clarkson Show and talked about how his body is highly unrealistic and it only looks like that because his job requires him to work out all the time. But he has a plan to stop the constant exercising: become a better actor:

“As someone who works out for a job, I promise you I would not look like this unless I had to be naked in most of my movies mostly. At some point I have to get better at acting so I don’t have to be naked in all of them.”

Um, Channing, we already have a lot of really good actors, so you do you and keep baring that ass in your movies. If I wanna see great acting, I’ll lean toward Anthony Hopkins or DiCaprio or Daniel Day Lewis, and  when I want hot ass, I’ll buy a ticket to anything you’re in.

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Things That Tickle My, Um, Fancy

Glee.
It's back. tonight. Not the Madonna ep; that's next week, but still........
It's on opposite Lost.
I have a DVR.
All is right with the world because I can be a Gleek and a Lostie all at the same time!

Y'all know about my feud with Lindsay Lohan, right? I mean, she beat me out for The Love Bug sequel, and I got cast in Twilight instead of her--I played High School Girl Number 14. It wasn't a big part but I got felt up by Rob Pattinson.
So, Lindsay and I have been frenemies for a long time.
Well, it seems that Nintendo, after a long five year wait, has decided to make a video game out of Lohan's mediocre movie, Mean Girls. But, and this is where I giggle, they left Lindsanity off the box cover. And she STARRED in the movie.
It's mean, to a mean girl.
And I love it.

This is kinda cute.
Yardley is using Ricky Martin's coming out party to advertise their new line of waterproof mascara, because all those girls who love Ricky are crying since he's revealed himself to be a man's man.
Um, yeah, Yardley? There aren't any of those girls left. They all got the memo in 1992 and moved on. And, as for boys who wear waterproof mascara, they ain't cryin' over Ricky's coming out either.
They're dancing.

I will have to say that i might be the Lone Gay Man who isn't dying over Sex and The City. I saw a few episodes of the series; cute, funny, I'll give it that. But it didn't ring my bell, you know. And I didn't see the first movie until DVD and probably won't sequel until DVD or OnDemand.
But that doesn't stop me from getting all giggly over the latest one-sheet for SATC2 with EssJayPee strolling single toward us.
Where are the other girls? Where are the other girl's names?
Uh huh. I smell SATC2 catfight.
Or, perhaps, SATC3: Carrie's Funeral.