I Didn't Say It ...

Kristi Noem, continuing to try and spin the killing of a dog into anything that represents a good, kind thing to do:

“I can understand why some people are upset about a 20-year-old story of Cricket, one of the working dogs at our ranch, in my upcoming book—No Going Back. The book is filled with many honest stories of my life, good and bad days, challenges, painful decisions, and lessons learned. What I learned from my years of public service, especially leading South Dakota through COVID, is people are looking for leaders who are authentic, willing to learn from the past, and don’t shy away from tough challenges. My hope is anyone reading this book will have an understanding that I always work to make the best decisions I can for the people in my life. The fact is, South Dakota law states that dogs who attack and kill livestock can be put down. Given that Cricket had shown aggressive behavior toward people by biting them, I decided what I did. Whether running the ranch or in politics, I have never passed on my responsibilities to anyone else to handle. Even if it’s hard and painful. I followed the law and was being a responsible parent, dog owner, and neighbor. As I explained in the book, it wasn’t easy. But often the easy way isn’t the right way.”

She will talk and talk and talk and try to justify killing a young dog rather than give it to someone who could care for it, but she will never, ever talk about her MAGAt make-over.

And perhaps those new blown-up lips make her stories shift?

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Mitt Romney, distancing himself and his own dog story from that of Kristi “Dog Killer” Noem:

“I didn’t eat my dog. I didn’t shoot my dog. I loved my dog, and my dog loved me.”

Mittsy, if you recall, says Noem’s “tale of slaughter” in her upcoming book is nothing like him being criticized for tying his dog Seamus to the roof of the family car during a cross-country trip.

True; he didn’t kill a dog, her just terrorized it. Noem, on the other hand murdered her dog because she “hated” it, and because it wasn’t a good hunter.

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Jeanine Pirro, Fox New’s resident boxed wine sommelier, on Kristi “Dog Killer” Noem:

“I have four rescues, and I have a puppy. I gotta tell you, you know what she’s done is, she’s sabotaged herself, whether or not it was to, you know, buttress what was coming down the road. She also managed to unite the right and the left. Because America—if nothing else, we are dog lovers. And don’t tell me you shot a puppy because it wasn’t used to hunting. You know, maybe you’re not a good teacher.”

I don’t think Noem united the two sides but she did show that Noem is woefully out of touch with the GOP if she thinks they approve of her murdering a fourteen-month-old dog because she didn’t like it.

Even Cruella was that much of a DeVil.

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Chris Plante, Newsmax host, showing his true racist colors:

“Illegals from Venezuela, Cuba, Nicaragua, and Haiti—where cannibalism is popular these days. Flying them mostly to swing states across the country. No electoral politics going on here. This is pretty obviously Joe Biden and the Democrats sticking it to Ron DeSantis, right? And sticking it to Florida and trying to move the demographic needle in Florida. And of course, you know, you put all the people in there, it’s like the Democrats during slavery times like the three-fifths of a person a slave because it gave them more seats in the House of Representatives, and they’re doing the same thing. The illegal aliens are effectively three-fifths of a person and they’re flooding them by 160,000 into the state of Florida. Much more than any other state, and it’s because they’ve got a problem with Ron DeSantis.”

No evidence of this, but Newsmax and Plante, like Fox News and Tucker, don’t worry about facts.

Plante recently accused President Biden of inciting civil war, when he declared that AI is racist against white people; he claimed Dr. Jill Biden dressed as Hitler for Halloween, and stated that late Capitol Police officer Brian Sicknick was actually killed by the COVID vaccine.

Truth doesn’t matter to these people because they have no souls.

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Mike Johnson, speaking to CNN’s Jake Tapper, on the alleged—or not so alleged—GOP plan to pass a national abortion ban:

“I don’t even know what you’re talking about—national abortion ban. No. Listen, [Hair Furor] has said this very well. Look, I’m pro-life personally, but I have 434 colleagues. You have to build a political consensus. After cultural consensus, Breitbart famously observed that politics is downstream from culture, and there is no consensus at the moment on what to do at the federal level so that’s not on the legislative agenda.”

Mike Johnson and the majority of House Republicans all support the “Life Begins At Conception Act” that would ban all abortions nationwide and rip away access to IVF.

That’s a fact. And God is watching faux-Christian Mike Johnson and She is not happy.

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Chris Sununu, New Hampshire GOP Governor, throwing his support for Hair Furor to win in 2024:

“I’m going to support the ticket. I’m going to support [Thing 45]. It won’t be his party forever. Right? It just won’t. At some point, [Thing 45] won’t be here forever. Let me put it a different way: Assholes come and go. But America is here to stay.”

Sununu has referred to Thing 45 as an “asshole” and once joked that he belongs in a mental institution, and who campaigned like hell for Nikki Haley, You’re an asshole, throwing your support behind a man you think should be locked up.

That’s the Kool Aid drinking, goose-stepping GOP.

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Sonia Sotomayor, Supreme Court Justice, droning arguments on Hair Furor’s immunity case:

“I am having a hard time thinking that creating false documents, that ordering the assassination of a rival, that accepting a bribe and countless other lies could be broken for personal gain, that anyone would say that it would be reasonable for a president or any public official to do that.”

Sotomayor spells it out plain and simply, though the rightwing justices are too simple, and too much in debt to Hair Furor, to understand.

You do this for Hair Furor, then you do it for every president.

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They're Everywhere ... Part Deux

It wasn’t hard, but I have found some more stupid to start the week …

TENNESSEE

The McMinn County School Board has voted to remove the Pulitzer Prize-winning graphic novel “Maus” from an eighth-grade language arts curriculum due to concerns about profanity and an image of female nudity in its depiction of Polish Jews who survived the Holocaust.

Art Spiegelman, the author of “Maus,” told CNBC:

“I’m kind of baffled by this. It’s leaving me with my jaw open, like, ‘What?’ I’ve met so many young people who ... have learned things from my book. … I also understand that Tennessee is obviously demented.”

Spiegelman suspects the school board members were motivated less  about some mild curse words—there are eight in the entire book—or the nudity—the nude woman in the book is Spiegelman’s mother, and the photo showcases the degrading way women were treated in the camps—and more by the subject of the book, which tells the story of his Jewish parents’ time in Nazi concentration camps, the mass murder of other Jews by Nazis, his mother’s suicide when he was just 20, and his relationship with his father.

What to do? Write letters? Protest? Cast a GODDAMNED vote? Yes, to all of that, but also do as Stephen King suggested on Twitter … find out which library has this book, and indeed all books banned by so-called conservatives, and check the book out and read it; or find a bookstore that sells it, buy it online, and read it.

Knowledge is power and if you read Spiegelman’s book you’ll see that the authorities in Tennessee are trying to erase the Holocaust from history.

And I know of at least 11 million reasons why that should never happen.

WASHINGTON

Robert LaMay, a State trooper was forced to step down from his job because he refused to get the COVID-19 vaccine, and after being let go, he told the state’s Democrat Governor Jay Inslee to “kiss my ass.”

Y’all know where this is going … this week LaMay died from COVID.

Sorry, not sorry.

NEW YORK CITY

Last weekend SNL made fun of Candace Owens in a skit, after which Owens ran to Fox to complain about the idea of a Black woman portraying another Black woman as stupid for laughs. Oh Candace, have you never seen SNL?

But then, minutes later on the same show, Owens showed how stupid she is when she went after … wait for it … Minnie Mouse, for wearing a pantsuit:

“It goes back to, like when they did this to the M&M’s and now they’re making [Minnie] more masculine … They’re taking all of these things that nobody was offended by and feel like they have to get rid of them and destroy them because they’re bored. You know, they’re absolutely bored. They’re trying to destroy fabrics of our society, pretending that there’s issues. So everybody looks over here, look at Minnie Mouse. Don’t look at inflation … look at Minnie Mouse. The world is going forward because we’ve got her in a pantsuit. Never mind, that you can’t get anything at the grocery store and you can’t buy a piece of bacon unless you’ve got $30 in your pocket. At least, we’re addressing the real problem, which is Minnie Mouse.”

Yes, there is no food at the grocery stores, and bacon costs $30.

Methinks Candace is too dumb to see that there are other places to shop, and she’s too dumb to note that even she wears pantsuits but a cartoon mouse doing so is taking it too far.

PS She’s been a leader in the conservative push to kill as many fellow conservatives as possible based on the theory that it will drive Joe Biden’s approval ratings down among the surviving Americans who were smart enough not to listen to people like Candace Owens in the first place.

And now she says the Moon landing was faked.

WISCONSIN

GOP Senator Ron Johnson is against government efforts to make childcare cheaper for parents:

“People decide to have families and become parents. That’s something they need to consider when they make that choice. I’ve never really felt it was society’s responsibility to take care of other people’s children.”

Johnson says slashing unemployment benefits to get more people back to work and alleviate the ongoing labor shortage would be a better alternative.

So, not only does Ron Johnson want to cut unemployment benefits, but he wants to make it harder for working people to get childcare so they can work.

ITALY

Pope Francis says parents of LGBTQIA children should not condemn them but offer them support.

But the Catholic Church will do nothing to help those same children, much less LGBTQ+ adults, and the church will never accept same-sex marriage.

How does a parent who is Catholic support an LGBTQIA child and also support a church that denies that child the right to marry when they are grown?

WASHINGTON DC

Supreme Court Justice Neil Gorsuch works right alongside of Justice Sonia Sotomayor who has diabetes, a condition that puts her at elevated risk for serious illness, or even death, from COVID-19. She has been the only justice to wear a mask on the bench since last fall when the justices resumed in-person arguments for the first time since the onset of the pandemic.

Sotomayor did not feel safe in close proximity to people who were unmasked so Chief Justice John Roberts, understanding that, asked the other justices to mask up except Gorsuch, who refused. His continued refusal means Sotomayor has not attended the justices’ weekly conference in person, joining instead by telephone.

Get educated. Save yourself from The Stupids.

 

I Didn't Say It ...

Mark Meadows, Thing 45 Chief of Staff, about the texts from Hannity, Junior, Brian Kilmeade and Laura Ingraham begging him to get his boss to stop the riots:

“We’ve tried very hard, in a very transparent and accommodating way, to share non privileged information, and what we found out tonight is that not only did that just get disregarded, but then they tried to weaponize text messages, selectively leaked them, to put out a narrative that the president didn’t act.”

Um, Mark? Those are the texts sent to you; you provided them. And now you want to suggest they’re not being used accurately?

Bitch please.

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Jim Clyburn, House Majority Whip and Democrat Congressman from South Carolina, with a message to the GQP:

"It's high time that we ... think about what's best for this country. If you want to think about what's best for one person, you are teetering on one-person rule; that’s an autocracy. For a party such as the Republican party, that my parents were members of, for them to turn the whole party apparatus over to one person means you're no longer a party, but you're now a cult. It's time for the right-thinking people in this country to step away from cult worship. That's where a lot of people are headed."

I tend to agree with Clyburn. Many people are moving away from this cultish GOP. Sure, it may seem untrue, but remember, it’s the squeaky, loudest, most unhinged wheel that gets the grease, er, media attention. And so that means a lot of the quitter, more disgusted by this traitorous wing of the GOP, is tired of it all and ready to move on.

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Sonia Sotomayor, U.S. Supreme Court Justice, rebuking the conservative wing of SCOTUS for their decision not to overturn Texas’ vigilante abortion ban:

“The Court should have put an end to this madness months ago, before SB 8 first went into effect. It failed to do so then, and it fails again today. I dissent, however, from the Court’s dangerous departure from its precedents, which establish that federal courts can and should issue relief when a State enacts a law that chills the exercise of a constitutional right and aims to evade judicial review … effectively [inviting] other States to refine SB 8’s model for nullifying federal rights. The Court thus betrays not only the citizens of Texas, but also our constitutional system of government. [The Court] simply ignores … the law’s numerous procedural and substantive anomalies [and] those vulnerable to suit might include a medical provider, a receptionist, a friend who books an appointment, or a ride-share driver who takes a woman to a clinic.”

The Right wants to turn us into a country of vigilantes, who turn our neighbors in because they went to Planned Parenthood, call police on doctors and women seeking access to their healthcare choices, and who cross state lines with guns to shoot protesters. Is that the America we want, or is it the America we deserve if we don’t do something to stop it?

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Chris Wallace, Fox News Anchor, announcing his departure from the “news” network last Sunday:

“After 18 years—this is my final Fox News Sunday. It is the last time—and I say this with real sadness—we will meet like this. Eighteen years ago, the bosses here at Fox promised me they would never interfere with a guest I booked or a question I asked. And they kept that promise. I have been free to report to the best of my ability, to cover the stories I think are important, to hold our country’s leaders to account. It’s been a great ride. We’ve covered five presidential elections, interviewed every president since George H.W. Bush, traveled the world—sitting down with France’s Emanuel Macron and Russia’s Vladimir Putin. And I’ve gotten to spend Sunday mornings with you. It may sound corny, but I feel we’ve built a community here. There’s a lot you can do on Sundays. The fact you’ve chosen to spend this hour with us is something I cherish. But after 18 years, I have decided to leave Fox. I want to try something new, to go beyond politics to all the things I’m interested in. I’m ready for a new adventure.”

His new adventure was announced shortly thereafter: he is headed to CNN+, that channels new streaming service. And to say Fox is unhappy about it is an understatement. Their statement on his leaving the network barely mentioned him or his career but instead focused on the network and their, ahem, ”star” journalists … Tucker, Sean, Jeanine, Laura and the rest of the loons.

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Gavin Newsom, California’s Democrat Governor, taking a bold antigun stance, based on that Texas abortion law:

“If states can now shield their laws from review by the federal courts that compare assault weapons to Swiss Army knives, then California will use that authority to protect people’s lives, where Texas used it to put women in harm’s way. If the most efficient way to keep these devastating weapons off our streets is to add the threat of private lawsuits, we should do just that.”

Wait until SCOTUS hears this case and tries to justify making it illegal to call the authorities on people with guns but keep it legal to turn in a pro-choice woman.

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Madison Cawthorn, GOP Representative and ALLEGED president of his local Hitler Youth Chapter, on “woke” people, i.e. liberals:

“I’m telling you, when I see the people that are in Washington, DC who are trying to insert their woke politics into our culture, trying to destroy western civilization, trying to take all of our morality away from everyone, trying to make everyone genderless, sexless, and Godless. We want our country back, we want our culture back, and if you want to stand in the way that, we will run you over.”

No, these 'woke' people are just trying to be welcoming and inclusive of all people, not just those who love a good Swastika.

I’d tell you to take a seat, Madison, but you’re already there. And before anyone says it, I know that was kinda mean, but this is a vile human being.

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The Funny Papers

Clay Bennett, Deb Milbrath, RJ Matson, Ann Telnaes, Michael de Adder, Bill Bramhall, Dave Whamond, Ed Hall, Adam Zyglis, Darrin Bell, Mike Luckovich, Jack Ohman, Kevin Siers, JD Crowe, Nick Anderson,

Congrats To Strong Latina Women Everywhere

Sonia Sotomayor was confirmed on a 68-31 vote by the Senate yesterday, making her the nation's 111th Supreme Court justice, the third woman, and the first of Hispanic descent to serve on the Court.