Bobservations

Prepare yourselves … last week Carlos had some stomach stuff and the diarrhea was happening. It got so bad he even called his doctor about it, but she suggested white rice and mashed potatoes and lots of fluids. Which he did but … once the diarrhea—god that word makes me wanna hurl—was done and gone, the constipation set in and now he was having the opposite problem made worse by the fact that he would describe his bathroom deposits to me. ME? The one who hurls at the sound of a word??

“I’m just waiting for that one Titanic poop and then I’ll be fine.”

“Titanic?”

“Yes, one giant poop.”

“Is it gonna float in the toilet until it hits an iceberg and then sink?”

Yesterday, he almost had a poop but is still hoping for ‘his poop to go on and on …

From November 2025 … It’s not that he’s egotistical, it’s just that no story is as good as a Great Tuxedo story …or so he tells me.

After Minnesota Democratic State Representative Melissa Hortman and her husband, Mark, were shot and killed at their home, and after Minnesota Democrat State Senator John Hoffman and his wife, Yvette, were both shot at their home but managed to survive, The Felon said he would not call Minnesota Democrat Governor Tim Walz because:

“I’m not calling him. The guy doesn’t have a clue. He’s a mess. So, you know, I could be nice and call him, but why waste time?”

Four Americans shot, two of them killed, and picking up a phone would be a waste of time. Thanks, America. We could have had decency but you voted for a fucking pig.

Nothing says it’s Summer like temperatures in the 90s and some hot beefy manly tan cakes, eh?

On the upside, while The Felon doesn’t want drag queens on stage at the Kennedy Center he couldn’t stop them from being in the audience and being cheered by the crowd.

When The Felon and his Slovenian Hooker attended a performance of Les Misérables at the Kennedy Center last week drag artists Tara Hoot, Ricky Rosé, Vagenesis, and Mari Con Carne also attended the show in full drag. And when the queens entered the theater, the crowd greeted them with cheers and applause while The Felon and Couch Fucker were loudly booed upon arrival.

The queens received their tickets from season ticket holders who donated them through Qommittee—a national advocacy network of drag artists and allies led by survivors of high-profile hate crimes such as the Pulse and Club Q mass shootings, a firebombing at an Ohio church, and an attack on a power grid in North Carolina.

Werk, queens.

I didn’t write this but it’s perfection …

One thing no one has explained is why women’s rights should vary by state, while men keep the same rights across the entire country, no matter where they live.

Don’t Americans have equal protection under the 14^th Amendment? Misogyny as policy treats women as “less than.” There is no law that controls a man’s body.

Now do the same for women.

And so it begins … work is being done at Casa Bob y Carlos with the removal of the two skylights in the sunroom. Both were failing and since the room has four sliding glass doors in it, as you can see below, do we really need windows in the ceiling? No, I say, we don’t. 

Next up, a meeting with a cabinet maker to start the work on the new kitchen.

Lastly, or close to last, we attended the No Kings protest at the statehouse last Saturday and were surprised at the nice crowd in mostly Red South Carolina.

Great spirit from the crowd and very few MAGAts out in a counter-protest, and those that were stayed back from the No Kings group.

The crowd was enthusiastic and large, but I loved this picture I got from the newspaper showing just two people protesting.

I also loved this photo from the protests in San Francisco where their message was loud and clear on ocean Beach.

And this last one, of another event the same day, that was sparely attended …

Sean O'Pry is a thirty-six-year-old American who began modeling in 2006 and is now the nest paid male model, but still … Would You Hit It?

After some of the nastiness in politics this week, I thought I could use a little joy and then I found this …

Bobservations

Carlos was doing an interpretation over Zoom at a Mediation hearing and during one of the breaks in the daylong hearing, the mediator asked Carlos if he lived in Camden as the mediator needed the name of an interpreter. And Carlos said:

“Have you heard of the Blind Interpreter? Cuz that’s me!”

And the mediator had heard of him, and now I think we need to have new business cards made …

Tuxedo has been listening to Jim, er, Gym Jordan, and Rafael Cruz and BoBo and Empty G—thanks to Upton for that one—talk about how much better things will be is they win, and yet they offer no plans at all, just whining and crying.

Oops, sorry not sorry, ma’am, but the Supreme Court has rejected a request from Lindsey Graham to quash a grand jury subpoena in a Georgia prosecutor’s probe into alleged interference in the 2020 presidential election.

Pack your girdle and your smelling salts, Miss Lindsey.

In the continuing saga of who is dropping Kanye next, did anyone have Goodwill on their lists?

Apparently Goodwill sent a memo out to their stores, instructing them to remove all Yeezy items because they don’t want to be associated with him in any way. In addition, Yeezy products cannot be sent to eCommerce, eCommerce will not sell any Yeezy products online, stores/boutiques are to immediately remove any and all Yeezy products from store shelves. They will also have to be placed in trash bags, and outlets are to remove any Yeezy coming through the “tippers” daily.

When Goodwill says ‘No,’ it means No.

I bought this for a Halloween costume but never got to wear it, so I’m thinking of doing some “Glitter Balls” and calling it Christmas Couture.

I’ve seen the GOP sink low, but to watch many in the party lie, spread false rumors and outright laugh about the hammer attack on Paul Pelosi sickens me.

The GOP isn’t even trying to hide it any longer; if you are a Democrat and beaten with a hammer it’s a plus for the Party of Hate.

Is Maya Rudolph trying to be as thirsty as Madonna? It seems she recently complained in a WSJ interview that David Letterman made her feel “embarrassed and humiliated" during a 2009 interview when he mispronounced her name.

Rudolph didn’t say a word in 2009, ‘10, ‘11, ‘12, ‘13, ‘14, ‘15, ‘16, ‘17, ‘18, ’19, ‘20, or ‘21 but in 2022 she tells the tale?

PS Letterman apologized for the mistake in … wait for it … 2009.

In an interview with Fox News’ Sean Hannity, Doctor Quackers AKA GOP Senate candidate Dr. Mehmet Oz criticized his Democratic opponent John Fetterman over his “radical” views on crime and his faltering performance during the live televised debate on October 25:

“This is important: We do not have a Republican senator north of North Carolina on the Atlantic coast until you get to Maine, if I don’t hold this seat.”

Perhaps Oz was confused and thinking of the New Jersey Atlantic coastline since he lives in that state.

It’s the Goopiest time of the year. My BFF Little Gwynnie Paltrow is stealing a page out of Oprah’s book, my other BFF, to reveal her Goop’s 2022 holiday gift guide, so let’s dive right in:

Gucci GG Waste Bag Holder so your pet can have their feces scooped up from the sidewalk and deposited in a Gucci bag for just $420.00.

Rowan Hair Color Kit for Dogs; it’s vegan, veterinary dermatologist-approved and comes in bold color sticks and has a “coat shimmer” for a splash of sparkle.$50

Higherdose Two-Person Infrared Sauna with low-EMF carbon and ceramic heaters, LED lights and Bluetooth or AUX capabilities for a hot and sweaty session; shipped to the manse for just $8,099.

Bolin Webb 24-Karat Gold Razor Set uses the same disposable razors you already use but this one has a  24-karat gold handle and a matching sleek base for $425.

Kiki de Montparnasse Tufted Boudoir Chaise. Is it a sex chair or just a stylish piece of furniture? Who cares! This sleek black leather recliner with brass details and could almost pass for something out of Architectural Digest and even includes stirrups for just $28,500.

Flamingo Estate The Good Shit . Yes, for $75, GOOP, er, POOP, will give you a literal sack of shit, a “blend of free-range goat, horse, chicken and cow manure” from the Flamingo Estate in Los Angeles.

Tapper Gold-Plated AirPod Chain. Are you still using wires? That’s so 2019. Why not order this 18-karat gold-plated chain for $110.

Chefanie Kama Sutra Dinner Napkins. Just in time for your next Key Party, drop a hint about the after dinner enterTAINTment for $88.

Cowgirl Sex Machine is the GOOP take on the mechanical bull, only you don’t hold onto to it with your hands … if you get my meaning. $1,750.

The Light Phone II is for those who want to go back in time before smartphones without buying a vintage flip phone. For $300 you plug in your own SIM card and limit your phone capabilities to calling, texting, navigation, alarms, music and podcasts! So 2000!

But fear not, the Smells Like Gwynnie’s Cooch Candle is also available!

Edward Adam Senn is an 38-year-old France born American model, actor, and restaurateur but … Would You Hit It?

Donald [t]Rump For President ... Because Mocking The Disabled Is So Presidential

I, sometimes, when I’m feeling especially dark and especially low, and deep into depression, wonder what a Donald[t]Rump presidency might look like. 

You know, Putin says something [t]Rump doesn’t like and he holds a press conference to call Putin a loser. He declares the British Prime Minister to be low energy; he finds some female head of state particularly unattractive and announces to the world that she’s ugly.

That’s President [t]Rump. Now, that might just be my imagination, but this, sadly, is not.

After [t]Rump recently lied about seeing "thousands and thousands" of Muslim Americans in Jersey City, New Jersey, cheering and celebrating the 9/11 attacks, his lie has been called out by someone who knows the truth.

Back on September 11, 2001,  Serge Kovaleski was a reporter for The Washington Post and he wrote a piece about police interviewing people accused of allegedly celebrating the attacks that day. None of those accusations or reports turned out to be true, and Kovaleski said so in a New York Times interview.

Last week, while once again saying he saw it and so it was true—just like he ‘saw’ people jumping from the towers as he sat in his apartment four miles away—[t]Rump decided to mock Kovaleski, and began imitating the symptoms of artrogryposis, a disability from which Kovaleski suffers.

Yes, a grown-assed man, running for the highest office in this country, stooped to making fun of a disability.

How-effing-presidential. Let’s roll the tape ….

And when the New York Times called Trump's mocking of their reporter "despicable," he issued a statement.

“I have no idea who this reporter, Serge Kovalski [sic] is, what he looks like or his level of intelligence. I don’t know if he is J.J. Watt or Muhammad Ali in his prime — or somebody of less athletic or physical ability. Despite having one of the all-time great memories I certainly do not remember him.”

Sadly, [t]Rump’s memory is another one of his lies, because Serge Kovaleski was a reporter for the New York Daily News from 1987 to 1993 and he knows Donald [t]Rump:

“Donald and I were on a first-name basis for years. I’ve interviewed him in his office. I’ve talked to him at press conferences. All in all, I would say around a dozen times, I’ve interacted with him as a reporter while I was at The Daily News.”

The Greatest Memory doesn’t remember that; but, remember that this isn’t the first time that Donald [t]Rump has ridiculed someone for their disability. Last July, he attacked columnist Charles Krauthammer—who is paralyzed from the waist down—for calling [t]Rump a "rodeo clown" :

“I get called by a guy that can’t buy a pair of pants, I get called names?”

[t]Rump tried to explain it away by staying he was referring to a different, non-disabled, columnist, but that’s not the truth … either.

Look, we all get to vote for whomever we choose, and I get that some people like the idea of someone outside the Washington Beltway being in office. But do we want someone who cannot have an adult discussion? Do we want someone who blatantly lies, gets called out on his lies, and continues to lie? And, worse yet, do we want a president who mocks disabled people because they called him a name?

Do we?

NCRM

Minute Rant: American Airlines Is F**ked Up

I hate airlines, for all their jacked-up pricing and ridiculous fees for just about everything, but American Airlines has sunk to a new low, possibly the lowest of lows.

Theresa Purcell, who suffers from a neurological disorder, uses a wheelchair to get about, and says the gate attendant for the San Diego commuter flight on American Airlines told her that it was too late to set up the wheelchair ramp for her so … Theresa got out of her wheelchair and crawled to her plane, and not one member of the airport team, or the airline, helped her.

"I crawled up onto the steps. I crawled into the plane. There was no other way for me to get on the plane so I crawled up to the plane. I was humiliated. It was embarrassing to have 50-something people watch you crawl into a plane."

Theresa has filed a lawsuit demanding $2.5 million from American and her attorney says if the case goes to court before it’s settled, she’ll ask for $6 million in damages. 

Oh, and American Airlines has basically admitted they’re guilty, and acknowledged the airline was in violation of the Air Carrier Access Act, a federal law that requires airlines to provide the necessary assistance for disabled passengers to allow them to enter and exit planes safely. American Airlines says:

"On behalf of US Airways and American Airlines, please accept our apologies for the difficulties Ms. Purcell experienced with her request for level entry boarding. It is imperative to provide essential care and to have a sensitive approach when assisting our passengers who have special needs.

We regret that a ramp was not requested so Ms. Purcell would be able to board the aircraft without going up the stairs, assistance should have been provided shortly thereafter. Based on what you've shared, it appears our employees didn't provide the attentive, courteous and professional service we expect as a company. I understand how the way you are treated can affect your impression of our" airline and sympathize with your displeasure.

After review of the facts, American Airlines admits they were in violation of CFR 14 Part 382 for not having provided level entry boarding as requested."

American Airlines has agreed to pay two million dollars in reparations, but I say that’s not enough. I say they pay the $6 million, and I say that Theresa Purcell flies First Class, for free, for the rest of her life, and is catered to like no one on earth has ever been catered to before.

This is disgusting. American Airlines needs to be sued and fined and publicly shamed for their behavior. Oh, and that gate attendant needs to be fired.

NCRM