Bobservations

I sing all the time around the house, often driving Carlos insane … like the other morning when I did my full rendition of ‘America’ from West Side Story as I came out of the shower. But … Carlos, too, will sing a showtune every so often, like the other morning when he gave me a version of ‘Climb Every Mountain,’ with special lyrics interpreted, and an overdone vibrato, by …. Carlos:

Climb every mountain
Search everywhe-e-e-e-e-ere
Follow every highway
Everywhere you go-o-o-o-o-o

Climb every mountain
Follow every stre-e-e-e-e-eam
Follow every rainbow
'Till you find your dre-e-e-e-e-am

A dream that will need
All the love in your hea-a-a-art
Every day of your life
For your whole life lo-o-o-o-ng

Climb every mounta-a-a-a-in
Follow every stream
Look for the rainbow
'Till you find your pla-a-a-a-ce

He only stopped when  Tuxedo and Consuelo abandoned their breakfast and fled to a spot under the guestroom bed.

And of course I believe him because he’s never once lied to anyone, anywhere, ever, right? Right?

Rudy Giuliani doesn’t want to appear before a judge in that Georgia case of election interference and now says he cannot fly because of doctor’s orders, so Fulton County Deputy District Attorney Will Wooten called his bluff, and said:

“We expect to see your client before the grand jury … here in Atlanta. We will provide alternate transportation including bus or train if your client maintains that he is unable to fly.”

Rudy on a bus!!! I’m dying! Cuz there's no Bar Car!

Minor league pitcher Solomon Bates has come out as gay, making him the second minor league baseball player to publicly come out, after David Denson did so in 2015.

“I haven’t been out as my complete self because I’ve been hiding myself. I’m a masculine man who loves the sport of baseball, and now I want to open up doors for gay athletes like me.”

Bates has been out to his teammates since 2019, but Welcome Out Solomon, and please accept as our gift the Official Coming out Toaster Oven and a copy of The Gay Agenda.

Welcome out.

The white man—I won’t say his name—who murdered Ahmaud Arbery after chasing him down the street because he was running says he fears he will be killed by fellow inmates if he's sent to a state prison to serve a life sentence for murder.

Maybe you should have thought about that before you grabbed a couple of friends and some shotguns and went out to kill someone.

Remember when Donald J. Traitor said, “only the mob pleads the Fifth”? Well, that’s exactly what he did when questioned by the New York state attorney general yesterday … cuz he’s a criminal.

In Australia, Victoria Premier Daniel Andrews turned several Melbourne landmarks—including Flinders Street Station, Melbourne Cricket Ground and the Arts Centre –pink as an acknowledgement of Olivia Newton-John’s “enormous contribution” to the state:

“Tonight, landmarks across our city will be lit up pink to remember Olivia Newton-John, and her enormous contribution to cancer awareness, research and treatment. She took her cancer journey and used that to save lives and change lives, and that’s just a deeply impressive thing.”

RIP ONJ

Y’all know I’m a slave to fashion ::::cough:::: but I ain’t no slave to ridiculous. Amirite, Balenciaga?

You may remember that Balenciaga has done some weird shiz before, like the … clutch your pearls, Maddie … Croc stilettos or the bootleg Ikea bag and then charged thousands of dollars for them. Well, now they have made a calfskin handbag that looks like a trash bag, and they call the “Trash Pouch” and charge $1790.00 for it!

And don’t tell me that your brain, like mine, right after it processed “Balenciaga” and “Trash Pouch,” didn’t instantly head to Kim Kardastrophe, because that fashion victim already owns the nearly $2000.00 trash bag.

Jokes on her because I buy mine in bulk …

Beyoncé has new music out and, as usual, to me, it’s the same crap sung in a newer sequined onesie and with more fans in the weave.

I heard one song, don’t ask the name because I didn’t pay attention as the lyrics were so mind-numbingly insipid, where she sings a line, then repeats it four times; she sings another line, and repeats it four times; she then sings two lines, and starts over with the first line, repeated four times … and so on.

I got ♫♪Wheels on the bus go round and round ♪♫ from it.

PS Yes, that’s ugly Beyoncé up there, but it’s also the face I make when I have to hear her sing or see her perform.

This is model, dancer, and out gay man from London, Sam Salter. He starred in Matthew Bourne’s all-male production of Swan Lake, and is quite bendy, but the question is: Would You Hit It?

What I Am Obsessed With Right Now

To be fair, I will not be seeing CATS because, well, because. But I am obsessed with Jennifer Hudson's version of Memory from the film.

 

Damn. That girl can saaaaaang!

Random Musings

Donald _____’s son-in-law, the one with zero government experience, is set to lead a new White House department—so much for smaller government, eh?—called the White House Office of American Innovation.

Sounds phony to me, but Jared will be daddy-in-law’s little helper in a new office staffed by former business executives—_____-speak for “rich white men”—to “infuse fresh thinking into Washington, float above the daily political grind and create a lasting legacy for a president still searching for signature achievements.”

Achievements like healthcare? Um, no; a Muslim ban? Um, still a No; a wall paid for by Mexico? Another No.

Good luck looking for _____ achievements.

I’m a show queen and proud of it. One of my favorite shows was Miss Saigon, which is back on Broadway and features one of my favorite songs, and so here it is:

Harris Jackson, the Baltimore man who stabbed bottle-collector Timothy Caughman to death on a New York street has been charged with terrorism. Good; see Jackson came to the city with the intent to kill Black people, so let’s put him away for, um, oh, I don’t know, forever?

That said, one disgusting aspect of this story was the fact that many papers reported on the criminal history of the dead man, Timothy Caughman.

See how that works in America? A black man is stabbed to death on a public street by a racist white terrorist—and remember, that’s homegrown and white—and his past is dredged up. It shouldn’t matter what his history might have been; he was murdered in public, for being black.

That’s, and the fact that the media aired the dead man’s laundry, is a crime.

So, there’s a show called The Magicians, which is kinda fun, and kinda different, and features some hotties ... like, clockwise from upper left, Arlen Escarpeta, who plays Prince Ess ... Princess? ... and Hale Appleman, who plays Elliot Waugh, and Leonard Roberts, who is Prince Ess’s father, King Idri. In a sly move, Elliott and King Idri were set to duel, as leaders of rival kingdoms, but found a better way to solve their issues: the two men would marry and untie their lands; ain’t love grand.

Lastly, while I don’t watch Dancing With The Stars[?] I was passing through the TV dial and saw one Bonner Bolton, rodeo star, dancing, and, well, let’s just say that he has the ass for dancing.

That’s all.

I also enjoy Patrick Stewart’s Starz show Blunt Talk. And on a few occasions, Stewart’s character has dressed as a woman, and recently the internet became aware of a striking resemblance between Drag Stewart and a certain Minister of Propaganda.

I actually think Stewart looks hotter. And now some fans are asking SNL to have Stewart on the play Kellyanne Conway.

Could be high-larious!

President _____’s approval rating slipped even lower this week in the Gallup daily tracking poll; now barely a third of the country thinks he not a giant douchebag, while the majority knows he’s a dick out of water.

Fish? No, dick is right.

This past Monday my Dad’s dog Foxy died ... just a week after the tumor was discovered. She did go peacefully, and spent the last week sunning herself on the deck and watching life in Toledo, Oregon.

Looks like North Carolina has just found out that Hate is expensive! Their Bathroom Bill is set to cost the state some $3.76 billion—with a b—in lost revenue.

I think the state should sue the GOP and all the haters to recoup their lost coins.

Now, back in the day, during the OJ trial—I lived in California then and it was the story—I watched the trial and developed a small crush on Christopher Darden.

Then, last year, The People v OJ Simpson aired and I developed a crush on Sterling K. Brown, who played Christopher Darden. Later in the year Brown was cast on This Is Us, which is such a lovely show, funny, heartbreaking, life, and my crush built.

Then that happened ... Brown gave fans a sneak peek at his six-pack, saying:

“So, I’ve been working on @the_predator_movie with the wonderful @_trevante_  [Trevante Rhodes], & try as I might to believe otherwise…that brother reminds me everyday that I’m 40 years old!  Even still…thanks for the inspiration young man. It is greatly appreciated!.”

And I thought, “Damn!”

Oh, FoxNews ....

At the end of 2016, Bill O’Reilly had hosted the number one rated cable “news” show for 16 consecutive years, and loved to brag about it.

As the kids say, Not no more.

Reilly has succumbed to the _____ slump ... Last week the number one show in cable news belonged to Rachel Maddow on MSNBC, and Bill O’Reilly wasn’t even number one in his time period ... that was Chris Hayes on MSNBC.

Poor Bill, couldn’t have happened to a bigger blowhard.

Residents of a Washington neighborhood say the _____ clan doesn't make for very good neighbors, hogging parking on an already crowded street and leaving trash bags rotting on the curb, and their yuuuuuge security presence, with even a trip to the playground requiring three vans.

Not Donald, though; this time it’s “Complicit” _____ and her husband, also called “Complicit”, and their three children who have caused the sidewalks to be closed, public parking to disappear, and the fact that the _____-Kushner house can’t seem to remember when trash day is, and leave their garbage on the streets all week.

But hey, their daddy is president, for now, so what do they care?

Maybe after the impeachment, when they crawl back to NYC like the cockroaches they are, they feel the pain.

Oh, and get this: the home is owned by a company with ties to a Chilean billionaire and they had no right, and no license to rent the home to “Complicit” until just this week when they finally filed their paperwork.

You know, because rules are different for rich folk.

But neighbors complained to the city, and this week District transportation crews were outside the house removing "No Parking" signs because no permits had been issued to use the signs.

Again, 1% problems, eh?

Random Musings

We’ve been watching Black-ish on TV and finding it very funny, and very timely.

In light of the recent deaths of Michael Brown and Eric Garner at the hands of police, and the increased need for a discussion on race in America, the show has been talking race, making it funny, while making it thoughtful.

One particular joke this week was that Black people cannot be racist because, well, Black. And I’ve heard the same thing about The Gays.

Something to do with being discriminated against makes you unable to discriminate.

It ain’t true. Some of the biggest racist and homophobes are racists and gay folks.

Just sayin’.

Now during the episode of Black-ish, ABC ran a promo for a new show about an Asian family, with the all too funny jokes about how hard it is to say Asian names. It’s high-larious … not.

The show, sadly is called, Fresh Off The Boat; seriously.

Am I the only one who finds that title offensive? Howsabout a show about a Mexican family called Hopped The Fence or Swam The Rio Grande?

Nope, not funny either.

There has been talk about what might be the new LGBT battle now that marriage equality is sweeping the country, and most seem to think it will be ENDA; that it will be to protect LGBT Americans in all fifty states from being hired, evicted, denied housing or employment simply for being gay.

And, on the other side of that argument, comes the religious not-right, who want to be able to discriminate against The Gays because God. And so this week, a local ordinance making LGBT discrimination illegal in Fayetteville, Arkansas was repealed just months after it was enacted, thanks primarily to political activity by conservative religious leaders and the Duggar family—you know the TLC family that spits out a new child every year so they can have a TV show and spew their familial hate.

Now the HRC is going after TLC because of the Duggar's support, both financially, and vocally, to the repeal. But who cares about that? If the HRC convinces TLC to drop the Duggar’s they’ll still be supporting anti-LGBT causes.

I’d suggest we simply ask The Gays and The Gay friendlies to avoid TLC if they choose to air hate-mongers, and then turn our efforts towards enlightening those people in Fayetteville who bought into the hate.

Just sayin’. Don’t get angry, get to work.

I saw this earlier in the week and, well, it made me look at our pets in a whole new, less enthusiastic , light.

Tabatha Bundsesen, the woman who owns Grumpy Cat—AKA Tartar Sauce—may have made as much as $100 million in the past two years off that Frowning Feline. 

The Grumpy Cat empire has grown into books, merchandise, appearances, and even a holiday movie.

I looked at our dog Ozzo, and asked why why why he wasn’t out there making money for the family? Why did they get lucky with Grumpy Cat and we got stuck with Dumpy Dog?

The next day Carlos informed me that the story wasn’t true, that grumpy hasn’t made 50 million a year for the past two, he’s made just 10 million.

Oh … my bad. Now excuse me while I get to making our pets look a little pissed off.

Well well well, it appears that the International Olympic Committee [IOC] has voted in a new Principle 6 clause stating the Olympics must be free of discrimination "of any kind, including race, color, sex, sexual orientation, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social origin, property, birth or other status."

This new rule is a direct result of the Sochi Games and Russia’s very anti-LGBT laws and policies.

That’s good to hear.

Speaking of Carlos, I have been driving him crazy … crazier … every day by, out of the blue, busting out into my high-pitched, off-key rendition of Tomorrow from Annie.

All Carlos can do is shake his head and look away.

♫♪ The sun’ll come out ….. ♪♫

We’ve been watching The Leftovers on the DVR. I mentioned last week about the hot-itude that is Justin Theroux, but the show also includes, clockwise from the top left:

Chris Zylka, Paterson Joseph and Max and Charlie Carver.

It’s like Beefcake-apalooza over there.

Speaking of Hot Men on the tube, how much do I like Finn Wittrock who plays the bloodthirsty, murderous Dandy Mott on American Horror Story?

The answer is “A lot!” He’s a hot little killer, with a killer booty, and a way to play crazy that reminds me of that other AHS star Jessica Lange.

I hope that however AHS returns next year that Finn is part of the show.

Carlos plays in a community band here in Smallville, and this week they gave their Christmas Concert, after which the band had a Christmas party at a member’s home.

Good food, good conversation, some drama …

Like when Carlos introduced me to his conductor as his, ahem, “significant other.”

I know; we had a long talk about hat and about how, if he thinks someone might be offended by him calling me his “husband” — because that’s what I am — then that unease is on the part of the other person.

That said, we chatted up Fiona, a lovely Brit who now lives in Smallville, and as we chatted the talk turned to food and cooking. Carlos said he as the MasterBaker while I said I was the cook, and she smiled and told us that we were the perfect pair; one of us is Art — that’d be me — and the other is Science — that’s be Carlos.

I reminded him that Fiona had no qualms about chatting up the homos.

And so this week's Song in My Head is for Carlos ..... though Idina Menzel AKA Adele Dazeem, sings it far better than I.

Random Musings

I just finished reading Guts by Kristen Johnston.

If you don't know her, she's an actress, most well-known for appearing on #rd Rock from the Sun. I never saw that show, because of a severe case of John Lithgow loathing, but I've always enjoyed Kristen on talk shows; she's quite funny, and very self-deprecating, and I am all about self-deprecating humor.

Oh, and humor aimed at others, too. But I digress,

Guts tells the story, and stories, of Kristen Johnston's life, as a Freak in school; of feeling like an 'other'--feelings which resonated with me as I reflected on my own school days, or daze. It also chronicles her addiction to pain medications and alcohol, and how, while appearing in a play in London, her stomach literally exploded.

Hence, Guts.

But it isn't all horror stories and drug addiction,. It's recovery, from the whole stomach thing and from addiction. it's the story of being different and feeling different, and how long it takes some of us, no matter what our circumstances, to realize we aren't different, we're just us.

It's hysterically written. You'll be laughing one minute and then be horrified the next, but it's a great, great story.

Guts: the Endless Follies and Tiny Triumphs of a Giant Disaster by Kristen Johnston. 

Get it.

The GOP is taking Barack Obama to task for his alleged politicizing of the capture and death of Osama bin Laden.

Um, GOP? STFU.

See, bin Laden was captured and killed under his watch, so he has earned the right to talk about it.

And, if politicizing that bothers you, take a stroll back in time, to W's "Wanted: Dead or Alive" speech. Or even back to W's fighter pilot arrival on that aircraft carrier and the banner that said "Mission Accomplished" when it wasn't.

And then take a gander at W's 2004 re-election campaign when he used fear of reprisal from al Quaeda to win the election.

Oh, GOP, you're all so Bible-thumping, but you missed the passage about those who have have no sin casting the first stone.

Again, STFU.

Okay, when I first saw that Tan Mom--seriously, she doesn't look tan, she looks like a burn victim--who is in trouble for bringing her young child into a tanning booth with her, I was disgusted.

Then I saw the mom, who obviously has issues with her looks because she's addicted to tanning and looks at least twice her forty years. Her skin is as chewy and sick looking as leather, and all I could think of was the N-word.

Not that one: Naugahyde.

Seriously sad.

Richard Grenell says he was "hounded from the Romney campaign by anti-gay conservatives" and so he tendered his resignation.

Was it the anti-gay forces who bashed the Romney campaign for hiring an openly gay man when Mitt Romney clearly does not like the gays? Or, was he chased away by his own Tweets and his own words?

I think it was a combination of both. I mean, how can you have a spokesman who has Tweeted some very hurtful and harmful things about other public figures, including some homophobic Tweets about Rachel Maddow?

His self-loathing drove him from the campaign. His own words.

Sitting down to watch Smash this week, the show began with, of course, a fabulous showtune, "Another Opening, Another Show."

I was giddy as a schoolgirl, singing along, and trying to get Carlos to join in.

But, and I cannot fathom this, he said, while he may have heard the song before, he said, and I'm so sorry, He.Does.Not.Know.The.Words.

I am seriously afraid the Gay Mafia and the Showtune Squad will be knocking on our front door any minute asking for the return of his Gay Membership card, the Toaster Oven, and his copy of The Gay Agenda.

Pray for him.

Sweet Tweet:

New book; er, books.

I have a tendency to read more than one book at a time. I was reading Stephen King's 11/22/63--which I found overly long...I mean, does every King book need to be 800 pages--while I was also reading Darkly Dreaming Dexter by Jeff Lindsay on my Kindle--Yes...I got a Kindle...though I will not stop buying 'real' books.

Now, I am onto The Leftovers by Tom Perrotta, which tells a story of The Rapture, which isn't really a Rapture, but more of a Sudden Departure because it didn't take all those God-fearing, God-worshipping folks, but it did take some of them, and some non-believers and, gasp, even some homosexuals.

So, what if The Rapture came and didn't take the ones who thought they should go? And what if it did take the ones who didn't believe? Or the ones who, according to those God-fearing-and-worshipping folks, shouldn't have been allowed to go? How do those Leftovers feel about being leftovers?

And, I am also reading The Mysteries of Pittsburgh by Michael Chabon. 

It's an older book, first published in 1988, but I recently saw the movie based on the novel, and I really enjoyed it, so i decided to see what the novel was like.

It tells the about a young man, graduating from college, and how he spends that last summer before "life" is supposed to start. And how that last summer shapes what may, or may not, be his "life".

It's kind of a coming of age story, though, from what I saw in the film, it's also a coming to life story.

And, of course, I am scouring Amazon for a new Kindle read, so....there will be more. 

I've given up on Idol because, seriously, except for Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood, none of the winners have had any great success. In fact, some of the losers have become more successful than the winners.

Daughtry, JHud. Adam Lambert.

But, I was channel surfing the other night as the show started and I was stunned to see that Miss Ryan Seacrest is still coming down the big stairs as the show opens, like some sort of cheap Vegas showgirl.

Ego much.

And I'm also not much for The Voice. 

I don't care for Blake Shelton or Adam Levine, and Cee Lo's little tiny hands kinda scare me. I do enjoy, though, watching to see how drunk Christina is acting.

But then even that gets sad and I click away.

And, in addition to not watching Idol, I also don't watch The Apprentice because Trump is a toupee-wearing, ego-0manaiacal blowhard.

But I digress. it isn't Trump and His Magic Hair that has gotten me a'scurred, it's the appearance of former Idol loser Clay Aiken.

He's on the show this time around and I saw a picture of him with his new face.

His new jacked up face.

Seriously Clay? Why?

Did anyone read that story of the woman who took her lottery ticket back to the store to see if it was a winner and, after scanning the ticket, she was told she hadn't won anything?

Well, she threw the ticket away. And another woman found it, took it into the store, and had it scanned and found that it was a MILLION DOLLAR TICKET!

Now, the woman who bought the ticket is suing the woman who found the ticket because she wants her million. But the finder has already spent some of the money.

Is this a case of :finders keepers" or should the ticket purchaser be allowed to recoup her winnings? And, if so, should the finder have to pay her for the money she spent?

My personal thought is that the store, and the company who made the faulty scanner, should somehow be involved in paying off this woman, After all, had the scanner not been wrong, she never would have thrown the ticket out.

What do you think?