I Ain'tOne To Gossip But ....

Remember that cringeworthy moment at the Oscars a few years ago when totally-not-gay John Travolta introduced Idina Menzel as “Adele Dazeem”? Yeah, well, he’s at it again.

At this year’s MTV VMAs Travolta, along with totally-not-closeted Queen Latifah—do I sense a theme?—presented the Video Of The Year award to Taylor Swifty for You Need To Calm Down. And Travolta handed the statuette to a drag queen he thought was Swifty.

Perhaps he didn’t know who Swifty was, even though she opened the show … and when she won for her video, she gave Classic Swifty-Who-Me-Realness, and still Travolta picked a drag queen—Jade Jolie, from RuPaul’s Drag Race—as the real Taylor Swift.

But at least he got her name right.

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Methinks he doth protest too much.

Prince Andrew recently claimed in a second official statement that he knew Jeffrey Epstein and saw him once or twice a year, but that he never saw Epstein do anything inappropriate with underage girls.

Back in 2009, Paul Page, a former police officer who served in the Royal Protection Command [RPC] talked about Andy’s ALLEGED visitors at Buckingham Palace, and now, thanks to The Mirror,  his words are out there for everyone’s enjoyment … well except for Andy and his mum, The Queen.

Page made the ALLEGATIONS against Prince Andrew while on trial in ’09 for investment fraud; he was found guilty and given six years in jail. Page’s testimony about Andrew was locked up, but now it’s out there:

“It was not just the royalty protection officers who abused their position, members of the Royal Household also frequently did. The biggest culprit was Prince Andrew … [who] … would often have lady friends come to visit, including frequent visits by Ghislaine Maxwell, daughter of the disgraced late Robert Maxwell.”

Ghislaine Maxwell is the woman who ALLEGEDLY recruited women for Epstein’s sex trafficking ring, and Page says Maxwell made frequent palace calls and always brought young women with her. Page claims Ghislaine and the female guests never signed the Buckingham Palace gate book, and that members of the RPC would drive the secret female guests home.

Page’s  former RPC boss Dai Davies confirmed that members of the Royal family can bring in guests without checking them in, because it’s “their home.” Davies also confirmed that Prince was known to have many “glamorous good-looking young ladies,” but that he wasn’t aware any of them were underage.

To be fair, having random women show up at the palace probably isn’t anything new, but if they were brought to Andy by Ghislaine Maxwell, it doesn’t look good, eh?

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Lori Loughlin, the star of College Admissions Scam, went back to court this week with her College Admissions Scam designer husband, Mossimo Giannulli and if you saw her enter the courthouse, you’d know she thinks her goose is cooked.

The first time she appeared in court Loughlin was smiling and waving to “fans,” and may have even signed an autograph or bribery check, but this week, she was head down, eye contact avoiding and rushing into court.

Why? Well, Lori has ALLEGEDLY been Googling herself—and not in the fun way—and is a’scurred this won’t turn out well. But that’s what happens when you pay some hustler half-a-million dollars to make up fake credits, fake resumes, fake accomplishments, to get your two less-than-intelligent daughters into USC.

And even worse than waiting for a Google alert about yourself is the fact that Lori and Mossimo have seen their neighbors become just so busy they can’t come to the pool party, or return that cup of sugar, or be a character witness for them.

Prison might be a nice change.

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Well, Billy Bush … yes, that Billy Bush, the one who laughed as _____ talked about grabbing women “by the pussy” … has got a new gig.

Bush is set to host a revamped edition of Extra, now called ExtraExtra—who thinks of these names, they’re a genius?—and swears he will be better at this job than he was the last one.

Meaning that if a racist blob of orange goo jokes about grabbing women’s pussies, he won’t laugh.

Bitch, please, you will always be known as the man, the husband and father of daughters, who laughed about sexual assault. But, hey, at least you’re making coins again, right?

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Nothing funnier than a TV judge getting busted. Amirite, Judge Mathis?

It appears that a valet in Detroit has accused Mathis of being a cranky diva by shrieking at him and spitting at him because Mathis had to wait for his car like regular folk.

I hope the valet sues and Mathis goes before Judge Judy because she will hand him his ass in a hot minute!

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Oh, the Stewart-Goop Feud is heating up again, and I am living for it!

It seems that the Bloods and Crips of the lifestyle brand market—Martha Stewart and Gwyneth Paltrow—are at it again, and Martha has backup.

While on the season premiere of Barstool Sport’s The Corp podcast, Martha was asked by host Alex Rodriguez about her long-standing spat with Poop, er, Goop, and we learned that the beef is real, and still on-going. A-Rod asked Stewart about her businesses in the lifestyle, cooking and publishing markets, and then asked about Goop—because he’s banging JLo and he loves some tea—like this:

“How would you describe what Gwyneth Paltrow is doing today versus what Martha Stewart created years ago.”

And Martha, who has politely asked that Paltrow stick to acting … hehe “acting” … pulled an ‘I don’t know her’ moment about Gwynnie, saying:

“I don’t follow goop. Sometimes I look at products that she’s selling … I wish every young entrepreneur well and I hope that there are many, many, many different kinds of entrepreneurs … if they’re movie stars or hardworking women like I am, who are not movie stars… If they have a good idea, I want them to be able to succeed. So good luck, Gwyneth.”

If they are movie stars or hardworking women like I am.

Damn, Martha, you still got. Whoever said prison would soften you didn’t know what they were talking about.

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In the wake of the Is-Taylor-Swift-A-Drag-Queen  moment at the VMAs John Travolta is back on damage control for being a bona fide asshat.

Travolta was on Dallas-Fort Worth’s Hot 93.3, and when asked about the mess-up, he shrugged and made it sound like he didn’t mistake Jade for Taylor … except he did … and also said that no matter what he does … like totally f**king up Idina Menzel’s name, it makes headlines:

“There’s so many people that bombarded the stage, that I was looking for [Swift]. So, the video has me trying to find her, and you know, I thought it was so funny the way it was interpreted. And it’s cool, I didn’t care.”

But the point, ma’am, is that Swifty cared. You practically Kanye’d her again!

But the real gem of the interview is when he talked about other things he’s done that make news … and, no, he’s not talking about that lip-lock with his private pilot a few years ago; it’s this:

“If I shave my head, it’s headlines.”

Shave your head? Bitch, please, you took your rug off.

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I Didn't Say This, Either

Neil Patrick Harris, to a fan who follows him on Twitter, asking for advice on "coming out as gay”:
“Stand tall. Be proud of who you are. Don’t break promises. Want to learn. Represent well. But more than anything, be safe.”

Susan "Cindy Brady" Olsen on the reported feud between TV sisters Eve "Jan Brady" Plumb and Maureen "Marcia Marcia Marcia Brady" McCormick after McCormick hinted at a lesbian relationship between the two of them in her autobiography Here's The Story:

"I don't like there to be a rift in the family. I love them both and this means whenever we get together for any project there will only be one or the other. But I do understand Eve's point of view. She got tired of Maureen gaining attention for herself by regurgitating the tiresome and false insinuations that they had a lesbian affair."

TV Judge Greg Mathis on a case recently televised between two men that dealt with one of them possibly being in the closet:

"If you are [gay] I think you should be up front about it. So many young men and women try to stay in the closet because their family and friends might be biased, or what have you. Forget about them. Be who you are."

Lady GaGa, on an ex-boyfriend:
"I had a boyfriend who told me I'd never succeed, never be nominated for a Grammy, never have a hit song, and that he hoped I'd fail. I said to him, 'Someday when we're not together, you won't be able to order a cup of coffee at the fucking deli without hearing or seeing me'."

Kate Winslet, aka the British Meryl Streep, on why she keeps her Oscar in the loo:

“Because basically everybody wants to touch it, everybody wants to hold it and go ‘Oh, my gosh,’ and ‘How heavy is it?’ So I figured if I put it [in the bathroom], then people can avoid the whole, ‘Where’s your Oscar?’ thing.”

Senator John "Dammit! It was my turn to be President!" McCain on why Admiral Mullen's statements aren't enough to satisfy his 2006 statement that if military leaders say the policy should be changed, that's what should happen:

"As I said back then, we need to have a careful examination. And Admiral Mullen was, as quote, speaking personally. Just this week the commandant of the Marine Corps said that he did not want DADT repealed. There are many in the military who do not want to. We are going to go through, hopefully, a year-long study that will, hopefully, also, have the feelings of the men and women who are serving."

Daniel Radcliffe on the LGBT community:
"I grew up knowing a lot of gay men and it was never something that I even thought twice about -- that some men were gay and some weren't. And then I went to school and (for) the first time ... I came across homophobia. I had never encountered it before. It shocked me. I have always hated anybody who is not tolerant of gay men or lesbians or bisexuals. Now I am in the very fortunate position where I can actually help or do something about it."

Howard Stern on Ellen Degeneres, and American Idol:

"Ellen has said she won't work with me, but quite frankly, after watching her on the stupid show, I gotta tell ya, I won't work with Ellen. She's out if I come in."

Doug Spearman on being an out actor and Black history Month:

"What Black History Month invited me to do, encouraged me to do, and still makes me strive to do is reach way beyond the late-twentieth century comfort zone I was raised in and do something. SOMETHING. Something that matters. Something that makes a difference. Something that helps. The people I learned to honor, revere, and respect were all doers. They changed the world for the better. And every February I think about my frosty teacher and her clipped Yankee voice and I thank her for warming my mind and spirit to possibility. To what I could and would do with my life. To making some humble contribution to Black History.It’s why as an actor, I chose to be an out, gay Black actor. Doing that, I took a risk; I made a decision that for years people in the entertainment industry considered career suicide. To be black and an actor is hard enough, but to call yourself gay on top of that? Screwed from the gate. But I also realized that nothing changes if nothing changes....So, I came out. And I’ve managed to have a bit of a career, too. It might be bigger if I’d chosen to be closeted, but then again, it might not."

Joan Rivers On Victoria Beckham:

"Victoria Beckham is so nasty. Why doesn't she just go home? Her dresses are beautiful, but I don't care what she does. She's mean to all the people around her. She's too short to be a diva. We all use the same hairdressers, make-up artists, limo-drivers and greeters at the airports in LA and nobody has anything nice to say about her. They say she's rude. She can't always just be having a bad day. ....You want to say: Calm down, you were a Spice Girl. The arrogance when she walks into a room is astonishing."