Meme Dump

Bobservations

The past couple of Mondays we’ve had some wild weather here in South Carolina. Last week we had heavy rains and tornado watches and I had to be at work, So I told Carlos to leave the weather reports on and if it gets bad and a tornado is close he needs to gathers the cats, his phone and charger, and some water and get into our master bedroom closet which is at the center of the house.

Luckily all we got was heavy rain and some high winds but no tornadoes in South Carolina.

This past Monday we got the same story but I was off work this week. Still, I reminded Carlos … cats, phone, water, closet. And we barely got a drizzle of rain and no really high winds.

Yesterday morning, I’m getting ready for work and I hear a siren go off in the distant, a long, sustained moan. I race from the back of the house out to the living shouting “Cats! Phone! Water!!” and find Carlos putting down his trumpet and looking around in shock.

That damn trump gave me tornado siren vibes and so I punished Carlos by putting him in the closet with the cats and NO phone. That’ll teach him!

The Great Tuxedo still has a lot left to say and he still has a place to say it.

Kathie Lee Gifford has said she doesn’t  like the LGBTQIA+ community using too many letters in its title:

“I don’t even know how many letters there are now. They’ve really got to stop with that.”

Listen,. Grandma, I don’t need some self-identifying straight white Christian woman telling me or anyone else in my community how we can or can, should or shouldn’t identify.

Gifford claims to have more gay friends that straight friends but then she sure loves to tell us how to live our lives.

Siddown.

JD Vance took time out from making sweet love to a love seat to tell us that the rising gas prices because of the war in Iran are, yes, Joe Biden’s fault:

“All of this conversation happens where Joe Biden left us in a terrible situation, and the reason why gas prices are where they are today is because of [Cankles’] work to get them lower, because the Biden administration, they were crazy high.”

So let me get this straight: When gas prices go up under Cankles, it’s Biden’s fault and when they go down under Cankles it’s his genius?

Anyone wanna tell Couchfucker that Biden has been out of office for fifteen months and gas prices went up just last week.

At the Oscars Jimmy Kimmel’s joke about Melanie’s “documentary” sent the regime into a tizzy attacking Kimmel’s family after he said:

"There are also documentaries where you walk around the White House trying on shoes."

Within hours, White House Communications Director Steven Cheung posted a rant:

“[Kimmel] is a classless hack who is self-projecting his depression and sadness onto others. [He] lives a pathetic existence where nobody, not even his family, enjoys his miserable company."

That's the official White House communications director … posting that … from his government account … about a shoe joke.

We’re at war and this has the regime pissed off.

Speaking of Cankles’ War, he asked several countries to send war ships to the Strait of Hormuz and, well, it didn’t go as he’d hoped:

France said No! China didn’t pick up the phone. The United kingdom said it was “discussing its options” but made no commitment. Japan also didn’t respond. South Korea declined. Germany said Nein. Norway basically laughed and went back to living their good life.

Still, this nonsense begs the question: why does Cankles need help in a war that he said he's already won?

Chief Justice John Roberts defended the Supreme Court against a barrage of attacks that Cankles unleashed against the court for striking down the core of his pivotal tariff policy:

“Personally directed hostility is dangerous and it’s got to stop.”

Hey Johnny, correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you rightwingnuts on the court give him free rein to do what he wanted? And then he did it and you voted against it and now he’s mad?

He’s a monster criminal grifter rapist that the Supreme Court created so check yourself in a mirror asshat, this is on you.

Now, after all this serious stuff, let’s have a laugh … Melanie spoke at a Women’s History month gathering and said this:

“As a visionary, I know success is not born overnight, but rather, takes shape after a long, and sometimes challenging process. Often alone at the top, I follow my passion, listen to my instinct, and always maintain a laser focus. In solitude, my creative mind dances—filling my imagination with originality. Attention to detail, demanding schedules, and multi-tasking are everyday realities when building towards success. This principle resonates across all my roles: as a mother, humanitarian, philanthropist, and entrepreneur. As well as with my new film, where I shaped its creative direction, served as producer, managed post-production, and activated the marketing campaign. Curiosity is a core value that keeps me ahead of the curve. Curiosity begets knowledge, opening doors to ideas and industries that I may have otherwise overlooked. This unrestricted mindset has led me to build across very different sectors: fashion, digital assets, publishing, accessories, skincare, commercial television, and of course, filmmaking.”

Clearly narcissism and delusion are family traits.

Pau Ramis is a Spanish model  with blue-green eyes and who stands at 6’2” which is all very nice, but Would You Hit It?

Ain't That America XXIX ...

I have decided to simplify the “Ain’t That America” posts by giving you what amounts to a headline, along with my personal thoughts about said headline. It’s quicker for me to post a few bullet points and quicker for y’all to read, so let’s go …

What better way to get the media and your enemies to stop talking about you raping girls on a tropical island than by invading another country.

Remember when the GOP went after Putin for invading Ukraine without cause but stayed silent when America raided Venezuela for the same reason last week? It’s not drugs or terrorism; it’s oil and money and greed.

If you needed proof that former news network SeeBS has flipped to the MAGAt side, note that the White House gave them the scoop on the illegal attack on Venezuela.

Candace Owens says it was the Jews who orchestrated the attack on Venezuela because Candace is an anti-Semitic lunatic.

Cankles now says the US will “run” Venezuela. Funny, because he is running America into the ground so I guess we can see the future of Venezuela.

Miss Lindsey Graham pulled her head out of Cankles’ ass long enough to call the attack on Venezuela “amazing”  and says Cuba should be next.

Pammy Jo Bondi praised Cankles for his “courage” in sitting in the White House and ordering American military men and women to put their lives on the line in Venezuela while he stuffed his gullet with McDonalds.

Senator Tim Kaine says he will force a Senate vote on Cankles war powers, though the GOP—still Carrying Cankles’ water—will fight that.

Most of the world has denounced America—and Cankles—for the attack; that ain’t America when most of the world comes for us.

One MAGAt Republican Thomas Massie claims Cankles’ threat to Iran is just like Venezuela: it’s about oil and money. One smart Republican who isn’t afraid to speak the truth.

It seems that both Cankles and the Couchfucker claim the attack on Venezuela was because they had “stolen” our oil with no explanation of how it was done … maybe it was that giant invisible pipeline Venezuela built in Alaska to funnel oil to South America when no one was watching?

The Wall Street Journal poked Cankles for going TACO on another round of tariffs.

The Democrats vow to campaign on the expired Obamacare subsidies and the idea that a great many Americans will see their health care insurance rates triple, but, hey, there’s oil to be had in Venezuela.

Tommy Tuberville, GOP clown, and many in that party, melted down over NYC Mayor Zohran Mamdani taking the oath of office on the Quran. Funny they had no trouble with a rapist, pussy grabbing pedophile swearing on the Bible.

Cankles says White House doctors say he’s in “perfect health” which explains the near constant medical procedures, the MRIs and the rotting flesh on both his hands, as well as those elephant ankles.

And Lastly, because this is funny and stupid and scary and all the things, but Chief Justice of the Supreme Court John Roberts is now calling for judicial impartiality. It’s kinda late, you traitorous prick.

And now you know, so … 

The Funny Papers

Bill Bramhall, Matt Wuerker, Randy Bish, Pedro X Molina, Michael de Adder, Marc Murphy, RJ Matson, Nick Anderson, Walt Handelsman, Gary Huck

I Didn't Say It ...

Nancy Pelosi, speaking to MSNBC and the GQP:

“What I’m concerned about is the behavior of members of Congress, who on the one hand, want to have the luxury of criticizing the president, and on the other hand not wanting to do anything about it. I will never forgive those people and the president who instigated the insurrection for the trauma that they caused to the workers in the Capitol. They messed up my office, they broke mirrors, they stole stuff, and the rest—who cares. But I do care that the impact, the negative impact, the fright they instilled in people because they were doing their civic duty in the Congress of the United States.”

Nancy has zero fucks to give and takes no prisoners.

I love that!

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Andrew Giuliani, Demon Spawn of Nosferatu Ghouliani, foot-stomping and whining about what happened to Daddy.

“It has to stop. If this can happen to the former president’s lawyer, this can happen to any American. Enough is enough. The only piece of evidence that they did not take up there today was the only piece of incriminating evidence that is in there, and it does not belong to my father, it belongs to the current president’s son. Any American, whether you are red or blue, should be extremely disturbed by what happened here today, by the continued politititation [sic] of the Justice Department. Enough is enough, ladies and gentlemen. We cannot stand for this anymore.”

Seriously, he thinks this shouldn’t have happened because his Daddy was the twice-impeached, one-term loser’s lawyer? And this tool is running for New York governor?

Bitch. Please.

PS Learn your worlds dear: it’s “politicization” not “politititation.”

PPS Is it me or does he look like Eric The Dumb One thirty pounds heavier? Did Thing #45 get frisky with one of the Missus Giuliani’s?

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Dr. Anthony Fauci, calling podcast host Joe Rogan “incorrect” for saying he would advise healthy young people against getting the COVID-19 vaccine:

“Well that’s incorrect, and the reason why is you’re talking about yourself in a vacuum then. You’re worried about yourself getting infected and the likelihood that you’re not gonna get any symptoms. But you can get infected and will get infected if you put yourself at risk. And even if you don’t have any symptoms, you’re propagating the outbreak because it is likely that you—even if you have no symptoms—that you may inadvertently and innocently then infect someone else who might infect someone who really could have a problem with a severe outcome.”

What is it with people on the right suddenly thinking they’re doctors or scientists? Rogan is a has-been actor, has-been comic, and a podcaster, so excuse the fuck outta me if I don’t want him dispensing medical advice.

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Joe Rogan, asshat, walking back his idiotic comments:

“There’s some legitimate science behind [these vaccines]. This is the thing about this whole thing, people being upset at me: I’m not an anti-vax person. I said, ‘I believe [the vaccines are] safe,’ and I encouraged many people to take them. My parents were vaccinated. I just said, ‘I don’t think that if you’re a young, healthy person, that you need it.’ [But] their argument was, you need it for other people. That makes more sense, but that’s a different argument. That’s a different conversation.”

Wrong idiot. We have learned all along that wearing the mask is for “other,” to protect “others.” And we were told that getting the vaccine is the same deal: to protect others.

You just wanted to be cute and edgy and, well, stupid. Almost as stupid as your audience because anyone Who takes medical advice from the likes of Joe Rogan over Dr. Anthony Fauci is an idiot.

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John Roberts, Fox News host, walking back the lie about President Biden’s ambitious climate change goals:

“That research from 2020 found that cutting back how much red meat people eat would have a drastic impact on harmful greenhouse gas emissions. The data was accurate, but a graphic and the script incorrectly implied it was part of Biden’s plan for dealing with climate change. That is not the case.”

Um, John, honey? Your news channel “implied”—and not how the word implied contains the word lied—about the data being part of Biden’s plan without one shred of proof.

Good reporting over there. Asshat.

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Lindsey Graham, Q-SC, says he does not believe systemic racism exists in law enforcement or other U.S. institutions because … Obama:

“No, not in my opinion. We just elected a two-term African American president … the vice president is of African American, Indian descent. [So] reform the police yes, call them all racists no. Within every society you have bad actors. Qualified immunity is a problem. It’s a pretty simple solution: Don’t sue the police officer, sue the department.”

First off, Aunt PityPat, you did not elect Barack Obama or Kamala Harris; I did. Along with tens of millions of others.

You, however, did, say, that:

“If you’re a young, African American or an immigrant, you can go anywhere in this state, you just need to be conservative, not liberal.”

Nope, nothing racist at all in that statement; you just act how Miss Lindsey wants you to act and you’re welcome in his state.

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I Didn't Say It ....

Michelle Wolf, comedian, clapping back at ______ who applauded the fact that, after her stint as host of the White House Correspondents Dinner, they will no longer use comedians:

“I bet you’d be on my side if I had killed a journalist.”

Snap.

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John Roberts, Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, also clapping back at _____ who referred to a judge who ruled against his policy limiting asylum for certain immigrants as an “Obama judge”:

“We do not have Obama judges or Trump judges, Bush judges or Clinton judges. What we have is an extraordinary group of dedicated judges doing their level best to do equal right to those appearing before them. That independent judiciary is something we should all be thankful for.”

Sounds like one conservative judge _____ can’t buy.

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Shepard Smith, on _____’s refusal to accept the CIA’s conclusion that Saudi Arabia, and their prince, were behind the murder of Jamal Khashoggi:

“The president said that maybe the Saudi crown prince, Mohammed bin Salman, knew about the murder, or maybe he didn’t, yet the CIA has concluded not only that he knew, but that he ordered the brutal killing. Lawmakers are putting pressure on the White House to punish the Saudis, both Republicans and Democrats. And U.S. allies are doing the same. So the president may not have the last say. We’re waiting for the full report from the CIA. But today, the president got ahead of his intelligence agencies, in essence, it doesn’t matter what intel says, we are standing with the Saudi kingdom.”

He likes Kim Jong Un because Un said he’d dismantle the nuclear program.

He likes Putin because Putin said he didn’t interfere in our elections.

He likes the Saudi’s who said they didn't kill anyone.

That’s who ______ likes.

Despots, crooks and murderers; they’re his people.

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_____, sounding buffoonish while offering his wisdom on how to prevent forest fires:

"You gotta take care of the floors. You know the floors of the forest, very important ... I was with the President of Finland ... he called it a forest nation and they spent a lot of time on raking and cleaning and doing things and they don't have any problem."

Damn you California! You should’a been raking the forests all this time.

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S.E. Cupp, on CNN, about _____ and the Blue Wave:

“Life is about to get pretty rough for the president. For one, governing is hard work and it’s about to get harder without Republicans controlling all the levers. His three-hour workday is about to go bye-bye. There’s also the deluge of investigations, subpoenas and hearings coming his way. With Democrats retaking the House the next two years will be the equivalent of a rectal exam for _____. And at this point, there’s little he can do about it.”

Um, you wanna give _____ a rectal exam, you’ll have to move Lindsey Graham’s lips and _____’s own head.

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Liz Crokin, Townhall columnist, on why the fires rage in Malibu … and it’s rich:

“This man [actor Rainn Wilson], I started doing some research on him. Guess what? He’s involved with a charity in Haiti. Any celebrity that is involved with ‘work’ in Haiti, you had better believe they’re involved in child sex trafficking, okay? So the guy who openly talks about cannibalism, eating babies, and raping babies and who just happens to be involved in a charity that allegedly helps kids in Haiti; now Rainn, ironically—not ironically—guess what? His house is one of the houses that was burned down the other day. Guess what? A lot of people who are up to their eyeballs in child sex trafficking have had their homes burn down. Burning evidence much? I don’t think it’s a coincidence. The more people they kill, the better because it’s more sacrifice to Moloch.”

She offers no explanation for the fires in Northern California … because she’s a lunatic.

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William McRaven, retired Admiral who oversaw the operation that killed Osama bin Laden, standing by his assertion that _____’s attacks on the news media represent "the greatest threat to democracy" after _____ dismissed him as a "Hillary Clinton backer":

"I did not back Hillary Clinton or anyone else. I am a fan of President Obama and President George W. Bush, both of whom I worked for. I admire all presidents, regardless of their political party, who uphold the dignity of the office and who use that office to bring the nation together in challenging times. I stand by my comment that the President's attack on the media is the greatest threat to our democracy in my lifetime. When you undermine the people's right to a free press and freedom of speech and expression, then you threaten the Constitution and all for which it stands."

Hmmm, whom to believe …the war hero, the man who captured bin Laden, or the draft-dodging chickenshit who whimpered about sore feet?

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