Bobservations

Last night around 11PM I say to Carlos:

“I’m tired, I’m going to bed now.”

“I’m going to read for a bit longer.”

“All right. Night. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

I go to bed and I’m out like a light until I get nudged:

“Did I tell you about my meeting today?”

“No, but—”

And he proceeds to tell me every detail of his meeting. When he finished, I again say how tired I am and am going to sleep, and again, after a bit I get nudged awake:

“I was talking to Ellen today …”

And he gives me a word-by-word replay of their conversation until I realize it’s now midnight and I say:

“Please, can I just get some sleep?”

“Oh sorry, night sweetie.”

And then I hear:

“How would you like to have dinner with some friends on Saturday night?”

“Can this wait?”

“Well, I mean, we didn’t get a chance to have dinner for my birthday last week and I was—”

“I guess the dinner and drinks and desert we had at Masa last Tuesday night ON YOUR BIRTHDAY don’t count?”

“Oh, I forgot.”

The worst part of this story is that we both had the day off and he’d had all day to tell me his stories but waited until I’m asleep. But hen, maybe he thought it would be the only time I had my yap closed?

This Tuxedo Tale, from April 2009 is one of many of Tuxedo enjoying his life:

Yup, that's how it's done!

You’d think that a guy who claims to have aced so many cognitive tests would know the difference between a doctor and the Messiah.

Ben Affleck has reportedly gifted his ex-wife Jennifer Lopez his entire share of their $60 million mansion for free. The former couple modified their property settlement agreement, which shows a “transfer of property among spouses” and I have two thoughts:

1] This is how JLo makes all her money, and …

B] Ben Affleck gave up $30 million to have JLO out of his life.

That’s all.

Following Cankles now-deleted image of him as Jesus, Nancy Pelosi was asked what she thought:

“You’d have to ask a psychiatrist, because it’s not worth a conversation, but it’s worthy of a diagnosis.”

Score again for Pelosi v Cankles.

After many late nights at the State Capitol to finish out the 2024 session the Georgia legislature successfully defeated ALL anti-LGBTQ+ legislation.

Yes, they stopped nearly 20 anti-LGBTQ+ bills with the help of the people of Georgia who called their representatives to make their voices heard and ended:

SB 88: a ‘don’t say gay’ bill targeting LGBTQ+ topics in schools

HB 1045: a forced outing bill against students

HB 1128: a bill to redefine “sex” to exclude trans identities

SB 141 and 519: bills to further restrict access to gender-affirming care

HB 936 and 836: bathroom bans targeting trans students

SB 438: a ban on trans students participating in sports

SB 180 ‘RFRA’: a license to discriminate on the basis of religion

HB 1140: a surprise amendment to ban trans participation from school sports and use of correct restrooms

HB 1170: a surprise amendment to restrict access to medical care for trans youth

This is the Resistance at work and proves that when we act as one and stand against hate, we win.

Cast a Goddamned Vote!

That’s the Tweet put out by Professional Grifting Grieving Widow Erika Kirk about her joint event with her future ex-husband JD CouchFucker Vance in Athens Georgia today. She claims her security detail said there was a "credible threat."

Yeah, a "credible threat" no one showing up for these two MAGAts and so Erika decided to stay home.

Elliot Meeten is a UK-based model who was scouted while having his hair cut when he was 17 and now at 27 the question is, Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

Work on the kitchen goes on; we are awaiting the delivery of the specialty tile I ordered so we can get the hood installed and the light up, but our contractor Craig was here this week installing all the knobs. He had a “management” question so naturally I was summoned from the office to the kitchen to discuss the issue, but first Craig apologized:

“I would have been done sooner but Carlos keeps coming out here and bothering me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“He was bugging me in the office so I kept sending him out here!”

And Carlos chimes in:

“I can hear you, you know.”

Oh, we know …

This Tuxedo Says is from June 2021, but is just as relevant today:

With all these state legislatures trying to pass these voter suppression bills, they are the perfect place to start voting out the RepubliQAnons.

That cat was onto something even back then!

The Cankles Regime has stopped commemorating December 1 as World AIDS Day. The US has honored that day every year since 1988 but no longer.

Bottom of Form

TheThThe Regime has  drastically cut federal funding for HIV prevention worldwide and an estimated 127,073 adult and 13,527 infant deaths have been caused by the effects of HIV/AIDS due to Cankles’ cuts in funding for the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief [PEPFAR], a program that has saved an estimated 25 to 26 million lives since its inception in 2003.

Fuck Cankles.

I recently read that Jennifer Lopez was paid $2 million to perform at a billionaire’s star-studded wedding in India.

I’ve said this about Taylor Swift and the same holds true for Jell-O … she could give a free concert in my kitchen and I still wouldn’t go.

Starbucks will pay about $38 million to more than 15,000 workers in what officials are calling the largest worker protection settlement in New York City history after the company denied thousands of workers stable schedules and cut their hours arbitrarily.

The bosses make millions and then fucks their employees.

Don’t go to Starbucks. Ever.

In Washington DC two members of the National Guard, Army Specialist Sarah Beckstrom and Air Force Staff Sgt. Andrew Wolfe were shot over the weekend and Beckstrom died from her wounds.

Instantly Cankles ordered 500 more National Guard members into DC but when children are shot in a school nothing happens.

Let that sink in ...

Anyone who invested $12,500 in the Slovenian Hooker’s meme coin scheme at its peak, not has $118 left.

I could feel sorry for those people, but if they believed that anyone in that family would make them rich gets what they got.

Jinkx Monsoon will star as Judy Garland in the revival of Peter Quilter's End of the Rainbow musical and Friends of Dorothy AKA The Gays, as well as Friends of Jinkx couldn't be more excited.

Monsoon, clearly the biggest winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race, has done everything from playing Matron Mama Morton in Chicago, Audrey in Little Shop of Horrors, Ruth in Pirates! The Penzance Musical, and Mary Todd Lincoln in Oh, Mary! and says approach to playing Garland will be different:

"I know people know me for impressions and imitations—but I'm thrilled for this chance to explore beyond the laughter and into the heart of why we still think so much about Judy today. Her tale is one that we can't forget, especially as women in entertainment are still fighting for autonomy and agency in their own careers. I'm ready to bring new aspects of her story to the stage, and to share what I find so tragically beautiful about her life.”

Monsoon Season comes to England from May 15 through June 21, 2026, at the Soho Theatre.

If we are at war, then DUI Hire Pete Hegseth is a war criminal. And if we are not at war then Pete Hegseth is a murderer and draft dodging Cankles is his accomplice.

Jakob Jokerst is a Germany model discovered at age 16; since then he quickly made a name for himself in the fashion industry and expanded into the strange new occupation, social media influencer, so now, at age 26 … Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

The other night CBS aired a Grammy salute to Cyndi Lauiper with all kinds of special guests singing with Lauper at the Hollywood Bowl. but my favorite part of the show was Cyndi telling the stories of how she wrote her songs and I was telling Carlos about that when he suddenly said:

“At least she’s not related to Lindsay Lohan.”

“Why would she be related ... Oh no, you thought she was Cyndi Lohan and not Cyndi Lauper.”

See what I deal with? I guess I should count myself lucky that he didn’t think Cyndi was Ma-dough-na or Jell-O. 

This Tuxedo Says comes from April 29, 2021, …

“Tuxedo wants to play off of Carlson’s idea of berating people who wear masks by asking the entire country to berate anyone who works for, listens to, or believes Fox News.”

I still think it’s a good plan!

While millions of fans celebrated, Kid Rock decided to rant about Bad Bunny getting the Super Bowl Halftime Show with this brilliant bon mot:

“So now the Super Bowl’s letting TikTok dancers headline? What’s next, a mariachi band doing Drake covers? Bring back real performers, not reggaeton karaoke.”

Bad Bunny fired back with pure Latin heat:

“You mad ‘cause the only halftime show you’re getting is at the county fair. Don’t talk about ‘real performers’ when your biggest hit was before Wi-Fi existed. If culture moved past you, maybe try catching up instead of crying about it.”

Aaaaaaand snap! 

Every so often a stupid joke finds its way to me and I just have to share it with y’all, so here goes:

Do you know what 50 Cent did when he got hungry?

58.

Please don’t unfollow me … 

I’m thinking  this must be what happens when the cakes are too big for the pan.

These are just a few of the things going around the interwebs that I thought I might clear up …

Undocumented immigrants do not receive free healthcare; it’s against the law.

Tylenol does not cause autism.

Bad Bunny is an American citizen; the Slovenian Hooker is not.

And it’s the Gulf of Mexico.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk … now carry on …. 

David Pruhs, the Republican mayor of Fairbanks Alaska has conceded the race to Democrat Mindy O'Neall after this week’s election.

Republicans have controlled Fairbanks for nearly a decade  but Democrats have scored yet another unlikely victory in deep-red territory.

In around 40 special elections since Cankles barely won his second term, Democrats have overperformed by an average of about 15% and flipped a slew of seats.

This is the Resistance, this is hope.

Y’all know I can scarcely tolerate JLo—or as Carlos calls her, Jell-O—but this is too stupid even for this Thirst Quen. I mean, what in the name of Kindergarten Construction Paper Art Project Nonsense is this dress?

I mean, yeah, she’s starring in Kiss of the Spider Woman but this is the dress she chose for the premiere? It looks more like Kiss of the Broken Belt Buckle Woman.

Someone lay hands on her.

Emilio Alcaraz is a six-foot, one-inch tall, brown haired brown eyed Spanish model and that’s all I need to know because I adore the Latin mens, but … Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

Since Carlos’ eyesight has gotten worse I have taken over the banking and paying bills and such. The other morning I was going to drop him off at court for a translation and then head to the cabinet make and give them a downpayment for our new kitchen and said to Carlos:

“I transferred $10,000 from savings t checking this morning—”

“TEN THOUSAND!!! For what?”

“For what? The first payment for the new cabinets, or maybe for my trip to the Bahamas—”

“You’re going to the Bahamas?”

See what I deal with?

This Tuxedo Says is from April 2021:

 I mean, come on. Tuxedo can’t even vote or fire a gun and he understands this nonsense. Sheesh!

Robert Redford passed away this week at 89; a great actor, filmmaker and humanitarian, he’s like the last movie star … Barefoot in the Park … Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid … The Sting … All the President’s Men … The Candidate … The Way We Were …. Ordinary People .. The Natural … The Milagros Beanfield War … Quiz Show … and so many more, including producing a great TV show, Dark Winds. His movies often helped explain America to Americans and off screen he worked tirelessly for environmental causes and fostered the Sundance-centered independent film movement.

And he was hot, too.

I have been tasked with painting the new ceiling in the sunroom and started the project last Friday. On Saturday I was going to finish the primer coat and then start on the new color but I decided to change the sheets on the bed first. I grabbed a sheet, walked around the bed and then jammed my pinky toe against a bedpost and, yes, I now have a broken toe … black-and-blue and painful AF.

Sunday morning as I limped into the kitchen Carlos said:

“You gonna paint the ceiling today or should I have Alex come by and do it?”

Not a word about the toe, just the paint, and would I like to climb up a ladder and paint the top of the peak which is about 14 feet up.

He’s lucky I didn’t break his toe.

According to the GOP who are painting themselves as the poster asshats for civil discourse the Democrats must stop calling Republicans fascists but Republicans can still call Democrats communists, socialists, the enemy within, radical left Marxists …

Make it make sense. Never mind, it's the GOP, and they don't make sense.

Jennifer Lopez popped on a blond wig and, in her continuing thirst for attention, spewed photos of herself all over social media. Sadly, many of the people who saw the photos on her Instagram page were wondering why she was posting photos of Gwen Stefani.

Oh, Jell-O—as Carlos calls her—you are so high maintenance and thirty for social media clicks that you actually had someone hold the camera for the “selfies” you posted.

PS That’s the real G-Stef down there and not Jell-O.

The other day President Cankles said, and rightly so, that “smart people” don’t like him.

Crazy, but true and even better is the fact that he keeps insulting his base as being stupid and it’s completely lost on them.

As I was at the cabinet-makers on Monday paying the down payment, I sat and chatted with a couple of the women who worked in the front office and I am not exactly sure of all that I said, but both women have invited me back every Monday morning for another comedy performance so their week can start off fun.

Andreas Giesen is an actor and dancer and social media influencer and if that isn’t enough he wants to know: Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

So we’ve had the roof repaired and replaced over the sunroom after having the skylights removed, but now we need to decide what to do with the ceiling inside the sunroom.

The ceiling had originally been these roughhewn wood panels that I painted a light blue when we moved in, but we cannot het that same wood and  it’s cheaper just to get something new. So our contractor called and wanted to discuss the new ceiling and I said I wanted beadboard that I would then paint blue. He said we’d have to decide how to finish it along the walls … one-by-two-inch straps, a coved molding, quarter round, regular crown or shoe molding … I said probably quarter round was best and we hung up. Carlos looked at me and said:

“Why are you and Craig talking about moldy shoes? I thought we were talking about the ceiling.”

I adore that man.

Here’s Tuxedo, still in lockdown mode, from January 2021:

I seriously hope he’s only thinking of the dog. I mean, he wouldn’t want to quarantine without me, would he? I’m worried …

The other day on Mitchell’s blog, Moving With Mitchell, he talked about a dinner of Salmorejo, a Spanish cold tomato soup similar to gazpacho. And  David, at The Adventures of Travel Penguin posted a link to the recipe so naturally I wanted to try it because I love Gazpacho,

This soup doesn’t have the veggies in it, it is a simple combination of tomatoes, day old bread torn into pieces, a clove of garlic, olive oil, Sherry vinegar sea salt and pepper pureed and chilled. Before serving, I topped it with a hardboiled egg and some gently crisped prosciutto.

I thought I was making a large batch, but it turned out to be slightly less than 2 bowls, so I did a roasted salmon served over arugula with kalamata olives, tomato, and red onion, with herbs and olive sourdough.

Thanks to Mitchell for the mention, and to Travel for the posted recipe; it was dee-lish, and it looks good too ….

Lisa Murkowski says she feels "cheated" after The Felon removed the tax credits she demanded in the GOP Big Beautiful bill. 

Boo-effing-hoo, Lisa, you trued a con man? You can never trust conman but you can always trust Lisa Murkowski to be a selfish sucker who got played.

I went to the doctor for a basic check-up recently and after the examination, he said to me:

"Don't eat anything fatty."

I said: "Like what, bacon and burgers?"

He said: "No fatty, don't eat anything."

Good night!!!

While performing onstage for her “Up All Night” tour in Europe, JLo seemed to respond to a fan sign that read: “J Lo, marry me?”

And JLo, or as Carlos calls her, Jell-o, perhaps forgot that her last film, Marry Me, was about a singer who was asked by a fan to marry him by holding a sign up at a concert, replied:

“I think I’m done with that. I’ve tried that a few times.”

The thirst is real.

It appears that $85 million a year for PBS is too much for the American people to bear so it’s been cut. And a billion in cuts for child nutrition, and feeding children, is, I’m guessing wasteful. But $100 million a year for a gelatinous tub of cheese to play golf is just fine and dandy and so is $200 million for Leon Skum’s Nazi chatbot.

Have I got that right America? Is that where you want your money spent?

Sacha Bilal is a 23-year-old model from Paris whose career is on the rise, but Would You Hit It?